Eureka
by Lathis
Summary: It has been three years since the mysterious disappearance of Ranma. But, finally, Ryouga has found his long lost rival . . . Unfortunately, that is only the beginning of their problems. A Ranma1/2 Megacross- The End is Here. Final Crosses - 36
1. Welcome to the Neighborhood

Eureka - Welcome to the Neighborhood.

Chapter 1

Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen. Lathis here, still on Hiatus and still doing a terrible job of it. I have good news and bad news. I have been pretty busy with the writing during my hiatus, just not with Dark Titans. As such, I have this story (which I've actually finished writing, but am having just a terrible time actually typing into my computer) for you. Unfortunately, both of my Volunteer Betas have apparently been pretty busy lately, so I'm sending this out without any filters at all . . . yeah, good luck with that.

Anyway, this does mean two things, though. Now that I have all of these plot bunnies out of my head. One, I plan on starting to write for Dark Titans again. Two, you probably won't be seeing anything from that until I finally have all of this typed in and posted, and considering my stubborn case of typer's block, it's possible I could have the entire series finished on paper before I type another word.

P.S. - Recent Addition. Due to FF being… less than kind, and erasing all of my scene breaks, I'm taking some small measures to start fixing that mess. Hopefully this new break (not really that new, but whatever) isn't too annoying.

I suppose that's life for you. Hopefully you'll all forgive me for sucking so much.

Again, Enjoy if you will, Tolerate if you won't.

OOOoooOOO

The young man continued to place one foot ahead of the other, continuing the endless cycle of motion which had come to predominate so very much of his life. Walking, the simplest action a human could do without falling back on those lazy autonomic anatomic functions that kept the body humming along. What was walking, anyway? Just repeatedly falling forward, only to catch yourself before you fell flat on your face. It seemed to be a fairly apt metaphor for his life. Every time he tried to take a step forward with his life, he inevitably seemed to fall flat on his face, only to pick himself up, dust himself off . . . and proceed to repeat the process all over again.

And yet he kept on going, kept on walking; unrelenting, unceasing, unthinking, an automaton whose sole purpose was to-

"_Ow_! _Damnit_!"

Cursing for all he was worth, Ryouga Hibiki bounced around clutching the toe which he had just stubbed something fierce on some errant piece of debris littering the road. The wandering martial artist rubbed his aching digit for another minute before glaring at the offending toe-stubber.

"Why the hell is it so dark out?" he muttered crossly to himself.

He could hardly see a thing in the near pitch black of the night. He couldn't even see the stars above, let alone a moon to guide his way. Only the telltale glow of distant civilization gave him any light at all. As such, he could just make out the glittering edges of what looked like a piece of glass sitting on the road.

"Oh, son of a-"

He took another look at his foot . . . yes, his slipper was ruined. It was a minor miracle that he hadn't cut up his foot, too. It wasn't like he had five pairs of spare slippers to replace the ones he was wearing . . . sure, he had _two _spare pairs, but one of those pairs were his dress slippers, and the other were about five years old and fit like a pair of tightened vices.

Well, nothing to do about it, he supposed. Taking a moment to change into his fresh, new slippers, he irately stuffed his damaged footwear into his ever-present backpack and slipped the massive carry-on onto his back. He was sure that if he kept heading to the pinkish glow on the horizon, he'd reach a city where he could buy another pair soon enough.

Still, one would think it would be the _least _the government could do to keep up the infrastructure. Sure, so he didn't exactly _pay _taxes, but if he _did_, he'd certainly want clean, well maintained roads to be a top priority. In all honesty, the road was the closest thing to a home that he'd ever had, so he would prefer if _it_ weren't lashing out at him as well.

He adjusted the straps on his pack a final time, then made sure his umbrella was tightly synched in place before continuing on his way. Come to think of it, the road really _had _been his home for the past three years, or so. After the last failed wedding attempt - what did that bring the tally to, three, four? – Ranma had simply vanished.

Still being the hopeless romantic that he was, Ryouga had tried to take advantage of his main rival's absence; unfortunately it appeared that he was just that much more hopeless than romantic when it came to one Akane Tendo. He wasn't even really sure _why _he had tried to woo the youngest Tendo after Ranma had vanished. Ever since the _first _failed wedding attempt, he had more or less given up on the fiery young woman . . . maybe he had just been feeling a bit nostalgic for the old days, or something to that effect.

Regardless, with no Ranma to beat, no Akane to woo and not even a snowball's chance in hell of actually finding Akari's farm, Ryouga's _minor_ tendency to become . . . _misplaced _. . . had bloomed magnificently into a phenomenal, meandering trek to which there was no end in sight.

Whoever said that 'life is a journey, not a destination' needed to be shot.

'Hmmmm . . .' Well, it wasn't like there was anything _else_ on his plate for the moment. The wanderer began to consider the logistics of A) purchasing a gun, and B) finding said person, when-

"-_hyaaa_-"

The sound was faint, distant, but unmistakably the sound of someone yelling out an attack. Almost immediately, Ryouga's sour mood evaporated and he perked up noticeably. Combat, or at least the potential for combat was one of the few things that could still get him excited after all of his time on the long, dusty trail. He was many things, after all: hopeless romantic, hopeless wanderer, hopeless dreamer, but above it all, he was a hopeless martial artist – no wait, scratch that last one. He was a _martial artist_.

With surprising ease, he managed to keep track of the sounds of violence while he followed it to its source. Oddly, when it came to placing himself into life threatening situations his sense of direction invariably flipped from 'Drunken Tourist' to 'Homing Pigeon' in a matter of seconds. He continued to assure himself that it was his Warrior's Spirit drawing him towards conflict, and definitely not a deeply seeded death wish drawing him towards destruction. It was either that, or someone upstairs just _really _liked watching him take a beating.

Suicidal tendencies or Divine sadism aside, Ryouga had never been one to back down from a fight. As such, he didn't even hesitate when the cacophony of combat led him off of the beaten trail and drew him into the darkness of the woods that ran along both sides of the road for as far as the eye could see . . . which wasn't particularly far at the moment. A sudden flash of light through the trees caught his attention, giving him yet another beacon to follow. It looked very much like someone was swinging around a flashlight in the distance, even as they continued to fight. It only took a half a minute for the swiftly moving martial artist to close the remaining distance.

In a blur of motion, the fanged warrior burst past several more trees, landing dramatically in a small clearing of the forest. He immediately set his stance and prepared to lash out at whoever looked to be the aggressor . . . or whoever was less attractive, depending on the situation-

". . ."

_Or_, he could help the man being attacked by a pack of giant rodents . . . That, at least, seemed to be a pretty safe bet. He shook off the odd sight of a remarkably tall man with what looked to be a sizeable afro hairstyle being attacked by ten or so bright white, red eyed rodents of the four foot long variety; it wasn't like he hadn't seen stranger, even _before _he left Nerima for good.

His ruminations were cut short as he saw one of the rodents leap into the air behind the tall man, preparing to attack his blind spot. Moving more quickly than most people could even think, Ryouga flowed forward and launched himself into a flying kick.

The sole of his brand new and fancy dress slipper slammed home into the face of the oversized rodent. The martial artist winced at the loud crunch that resulted from the strike - '_Great, now I got blood on my good slippers_!' - then the rodent vanished from sight, disappearing back into the darkness of the forest from the force of his attack.

The distant sound of a soft body colliding with something indisputably _not _soft, and a pained squeal, gave him the distinct impression that _that _rat wouldn't be back any time soon.

He landed a second later, spinning down and to the side to avoid another of the rodents leaping through the air. Simultaneously, the fanged warrior unlimbered his umbrella with practiced ease just in time to finish his spin, implement held horizontally before him to catch the unnervingly long teeth of a third rodent a mere twelve inches from his face.

With a contemptuous twist of the handle, he sent the entire bulk of the white furred creature spinning wildly in the air. Even as the monster mouse crashed to the ground and began to roll uncontrollably to the side, bowling over a fourth rodent, Ryouga looked at the rather sizeable hole in the canopy of his favorite umbrella.

"_This_ is why I can never have nice things," he lamented sourly.

Apparently those teeth weren't anything to sneeze at. If those rats could actually chew through his umbrella, he certainly didn't want to put his delectable flesh to the test. Like he didn't get enough of _that _with P-Chan.

"Screw this, _Bakusai Tenketsu_!"

Yelling his familiar epitaph, Ryouga jammed his index finger into the ground at his feet with reckless abandon. It was followed a fraction of a second later by a rather sizeable detonation of soft forest soil and assorted tree roots-

"Hey- _Whoo-Oof!_"

Oh, _riiiight_, he'd been _saving _someone. The bandanna clad martial artist chuckled in embarrassment as the remaining rodents squealed in panic and fled beyond his sight into the darkened woods. Well, not exactly one of his smoother rescues, but it looked like he managed to chase off the giant rats at any rate.

Ryouga turned to regard the fortunate recipient of his timely aid; at least what he could see of the poor fellow, half buried in dirt as he was.

"Umm, you alright, Mister?"

He ventured forward to help extricate his companion, when suddenly the earthen mound burst up into a fountain of dirt, the buried man leaping heroically to his feet.

"A_HAHAHAHA_! Of course I'm alright, boy! In fact, if you hadn't shown up when you had, _I _would have performed a similar attack myself. Of course, considering how much more powerful _mine_ would have been, it was obviously for the best that I didn't, A_HAHAHAHA_!"

Ryouga could only stare at the man in wonder for a moment. However, things began to click in his mind with startling speed. The dark brown gi top, the dirtied yet still white pants, the intensely muscled frame and the distinctive hair and mustache . . .

The young warrior found himself nearly vibrating with giddiness as he realized just whom he had assisted.

"Y-y-you're _Mr. Satan_!" he very nearly squealed.

The world renowned martial artist looked shocked for a moment, before a beaming smile lit up his face and he stood straight and proud.

"So, you've heard of me, have you? Not really a surprise, I suppose, you look like you know a little martial arts yourself."

Ryouga nodded excitedly.

"Yeah. You _really_ tore up all of the tournament leagues around the world. In fact, I'd always kind of hoped to fight you in one, but I've never had much luck registering for tournaments . . . well, except for that Dark Tournament a few years back . . ."

Mr. Satan looked at him oddly for a moment, before shrugging.

"Still, I should thank you for helping me out there, Son. You saved me a little bit of trouble, chasing off those mutants like you did. I mean, of course I could have handled them, likely would have finished them in another minute or so, but I wouldn't have been quite so merciful."

Ryouga nodded, agreeing completely.

"I don't doubt it, Mr. Satan. By the way, my names Hibiki Ryouga, and I'm a really big fan of yours."

The Afro wearing martial artist let out another boisterous bout of laughter.

"Of _course _you are. And please, call me Hercule. Now, I better start tracking down those creatures before they cause any problems. Thanks again for the help, Son."

Hercule then proceeded to suit action to word, taking a step in the direction that one of the various rodents had escaped in-

Only to collapse instantly to the ground in a gurgling heap.

"_Mr. Satan_!"

Instantly, Ryouga was at the world famous fighter's side, helping the bulky man back to his feet. A quick scan revealed the problem in an instant. Though it had been partially concealed by the dirt and the darkness, Ryouga's idol had sustained a nasty looking bite to the back of his leg. Frankly, it was a testament to the older man's tenacity that he could even stand with such an injury, let alone put up such a brave front.

Mr. Satan chuckled weakly as he allowed Ryouga to bear the bulk of his weight on his comparatively narrow shoulder.

"W-well, I guess taking a _small _break wouldn't hurt too much. I don't suppose it would be too much of an imposition to ask you to help me back to town, would it, Ryouga?"

'_Ahhhh! He said my name_!'

"N-no, not at all, Mr. Satan."

The massive man smiled and gave him an energetic thumbs up.

"Thanks, kid. And, really, call me Hercule."

OOOoooOOO

Several tightly synched bandannas for a makeshift bandage and roughly forty minutes later, Ryouga and his world famous shoulder warmer had finally found civilization. The wanderer sighed in relief as the welcome sight of softly glowing streetlights scattered the eerie darkness which had cocooned him since the setting of the sun. It had been a long, long time since he'd seen such a dark night, and it wasn't a prospect he hoped to repeat.

The town itself seemed to be fairly mundane, looking like any of the other hundred small Japanese settlements that he'd passed through over the years. It did have a somewhat cozy feel to it, none of the buildings rose above two stories and the streets were well lit and surprisingly clean. A sparse number of automobiles were parked along the sides of the road, which appeared to turn into the main strip as it entered into the town proper.

There was even a large digital display mounted on one of the streetlights displaying the time –

Wait, it was only _ten thirty_? Considering the inky darkness he'd been traveling through, he assumed it was well after midnight. True, he hadn't really been paying attention to the time, but it had felt like he'd been traveling down that road forever.

'Meh, probably just my imagination,' he mused.

In fact, several storefronts were still lit up, most notably what looked like a restaurant down the road. He squinted his eyes to read the sign, the 'Yang Spring' restaurant, eh? He'd have to check it out after he got Hercule some help. He was _starving_.

"So, where's the Doctor around here, Mr. Satan?"

His companion, looking a little on the pale side, let out a weak groan. "There's a private practice a few blocks over. The doc is a nice enough guy, he won't mind a visit at this hour."

Ryouga nodded agreeably and began to move forward to Hercrule's prodding once more. Thankfully the world-renowned fighter hadn't taken too long to pick up on his directional problem. Oddly, though, Mr. Satan had barely even batted an eyelash when Ryouga had explained his condition. Just a minor shrug of his shoulders before he began to shepherd the Lost Boy along.

Oh, if only all people were so understanding . . .

They were just about to pass by the restaurant he'd noticed moments earlier, when suddenly the door opened. With the perky ringing of a bell, the glass edifice ejected a lovely young woman . . . a lovely young woman that almost walked headlong into the hobbling pair of martial artists. Ryouga quickly shuffle stepped to the side, taking in the odd female as he did.

There were two things that stood out right away about the young woman, besides her aesthetic looks, anyway. She had long, blonde hair, and he meant _long,_ as in nearly brushing the ground behind her long. How long did this girl take to wash all that hair, anyway? Did she spend half the day in the shower or something?

The rather abrupt thought of this girl in the shower caused his nose to throb in warning, so he quickly latched onto the other attribute which he'd noticed on the girl. She appeared to have . . . to have large, _plastic looking_ ears. They were down turned, reminding him of a mopey cat, or something, except for the glossy sheen to them. The oddity of her ears was enough to force him to remember his manners.

He was about to apologize for . . . um, for nearly letting her walk into him, when-

"Chi!" exclaimed the lovely young woman.

At his side, Hercule began to laugh nervously. "Um, heh, heh. Oh, hey there, Chi! Nice to see you, now why don't you run along home?"

The weird ear girl nodded happily then began to make down the street, leaving them with a final, upbeat, "Chi!"

Ryouga stared after Chi for a long moment, before turning to his companion.

"Was it just me . . . or did she have plastic ears?"

Mr. Satan let out another nervous chuckle. "Ah, those were orthopedic earmuffs . . . she's, ah . . . _anemic_?"

'Ah, anemia. Tragic, that.' Ryouga shook his head sadly. That really was too bad, such a pretty girl having to deal with a condition like that.

"Um, so, where was that doctor's place, again?"

An odd look on his face for some reason, likely the pain, Mr. Satan began to lead him down the street once more, nervous chuckles leaking out of him like water from a leaky sink. Ryouga was starting to wonder what was so funny . . .

They made it two blocks down the road before they reached the cross street they needed to take to reach the doctor's practice. As such, Ryouga waited patiently at the crosswalk for the crossing signal to change. Not that he was really worried about getting hit at this time of night, but the desire to adhere to the delicate social contract which bound all of society together kept him from crossing the street before it was time. Heck, there was only one car even traveling down the road this late-

"Huh," Ryouga commented, "Was it just me . . . or did that car not have any wheels?"

Mr. Satan stiffened noticeably at his innocuous question, responding with surprising speed.

"_Oh_ . . . ah, th-they're in the shop."

Ryouga considered this for a moment.

"Hunh, go figure."

With that, the tiny flashing hand transformed into a tiny pictograph of a walking person, and Ryouga began to drag his companion across the road. For some reason, Mr. Satan let out a sigh of relief. Maybe the pain was beginning to subside? That could be a good sign, or a very, very bad sign, depending on how bad his wound was. Deciding to err on the side of caution, Ryouga picked up the pace as he made his way down the street-

He made it about five yards before he froze in terror.

"_Ohohohohohohoho_!"

No . . . wait a moment, Kodachi's laugh was more of a '_Ahahahahahahaha_!', with a slightly more unhinged flavor to it. With that thought firmly in mind, Ryouga let out his own sigh of relief and turned his attention to the perpetrator of the maniacal laughter-

Oh, it was just a lavender haired girl wearing an armor plated bikini flying down the street at incredible speeds . . . that was all. Still fifty feet down the road, the scantily clad war-machine spun in mid flight and lifted an arm at a figure trailing in the distance behind her.

"_Fool_! You believe yourself a match for the stunningly beautiful Daitokuji Biko? _Akagiyama_ _Missiles_!"

Ryouga's eyes widened slightly as a salvo of tiny little missiles exploded from the young woman's rather slim looking gauntlet to scream down the street. The figure, who also appeared to be gliding down the street at high speeds, didn't even slow, just raised a gloved hand and the explosive warheads detonated several yards ahead of him. A second later, the man (Ryouga was sure he was a man, despite the long, silver hair tied into a ponytail) held out his gloved hand and a glowing broadsword of pure green energy formed from naught but air.

Ryouga's eyes widened further at that. It wasn't everyday he got to see such an advanced display of chi control, and it had been over a year since he'd met a person actually capable of creating an energy sword . . .

"My Dear, you can not even _begin _to fathom the depths of the power with which you trifle."

With that, the silver haired swordsmen, sporting an intellectual looking pair of spectacles perched on his nose (a fact only made noticeable as he flew past) increased his speed and closed the distance with the bikini clad warrior, inciting a good section of the infrastructure to literally disintegrate as they began trading blows.

Ryouga could only watch, jaw agape, as the pair continued to battle their way down the street, explosions and the hissing of high energy plasma searing the air and lighting up the night, before they reached an intersection three blocks down and inexplicably took a left.

Slowly, the fanged wanderer turned to face his companion.

". . . Was it _just_ _me_ . . ."

"What? _Those _two? This is just their _date_ night," Hercule replied to his unasked question with a blasé tone.

"Oh . . . well, that makes sense," Ryouga conceded.

"Wait, _it does_?"

The incredulous look which suddenly bloomed on Hercule's face made Ryouga wonder if he'd said something wrong. Eyes narrowing slightly, he regarded his Martial Arts senior with a skeptical gaze.

"_Shouldn't it_?"

Mr. Satan began to laugh nervously, rubbing the back of his head in a disturbingly familiar manner.

"_Ahahaha_ . . . of _course _it should! You know how those crazy kids are these days? What with their Naruto anime and Yu Gi Oh card games, _everything's _gotta be a big fight . . . _right_?"

Well, those weren't examples that _he _would have used, but Ryouga supposed the sentiment still rang true. Though, that guy had looked a little on the old side to be playing any card games, well, besides high stakes poker or something like that.

"Ah well, so how far to the doctor's again?"

"Ahhhh, about that . . . you know what? The Sheriff's office is actually a lot closer than that, and I know they have a first aid kit there. Just follow my lead and we'll get there in no time."

Ryouga gave a non-committal shrug. It hardly mattered to him one way or the other. At this point, finding his way back to that restaurant before it closed for the night was getting higher and higher on his priority list. The whiff he'd gotten when that anemic girl had opened the restaurant door had gotten his stomach to rumbling something fierce.

So, a mere ten minutes later (he could have _sworn_ that Hercule had said it was closer than the doctor's office . . . but hadn't they been just a block away from there?) the pair found themselves standing outside the rather non-descript face of the Sheriff's Office. The sign hanging above the door with 'Sheriff's Office' blazoned across it helped to alleviate his worry that they might have been at the wrong place.

Without further ado, Ryouga pushed open the door, causing another bell to chime, and dragged his Martial Arts Idol through the door. The bandanna clad fighter took a moment to take in the interior of the office. It had a very 'small town' feel to it. Nice, hard wood floors, a standard looking cell taking up most of one half of the room, and several heavy wooden desks, littered with various office clutter.

The most notable accoutrement of the office had to be the young woman lounging comfortably behind one of the desks, her feet kicked up onto its wooden surface and her hands folded lazily behind her head. Much like that Chi girl, Ryouga also noticed two notable things about this female as well. The first was her spiky, cyan hair, flowing back over the chair like the untamed mane of a wild animal.

The second was her glistening amber eyes. The pupil's of said eyes were slit, very much like those of a cat, adding to already wild appearance that her hair provided. The young woman, Deputy Ryoko he would guess, judging by the nameplate sitting on the edge of her desk, looked up lazily at their entrance, only to perk up noticeably when she apparently realized just who it was that got dragged through her door.

He decided to play it especially polite, since it was just common sense to be polite to women, and one should always be polite to authority figures. "Hello, ma'am. You wouldn't happen to know if the Sheriff is in, would you? I have an injured man in need of assistance."

A smirk played across the young woman's lips that came across as positively 'catty' to the lost boy. And after knowing Shampoo so long, he had a _lot _of experience with _that _look.

"Actually, he just got in. Would you like me to get him for you?"

Before Ryouga even had the chance to nod, let alone reply, the cheerful woman suddenly leaned forward. Then, against all of the laws of physics which Ryouga knew (which wasn't very many, and even the ones that he knew were on pretty shaky ground considering some of the people he'd met over his travels) her feet passed directly _through_ the desk, bringing her quickly to a standing . . . err, floating position, she then proceed to glide bodily throughthe desk.

For the third (or was it fourth?) time that night, Ryouga's eyes widened in surprise. The amber eyed Deputy stared at him expectantly for a moment, apparently waiting for more than a mere widening of his eyes. When no such reaction was forthcoming, she gave a weak shrug of her shoulders and proceeded to pluck Mr. Satan's bulky form from his shoulder by the back of his gi, as if the massive man weighed no more than a sack of feathers.

"Stranger, Sheriff. Sheriff, stranger."

Hercule had the good graces to shrug sheepishly as he dangled helplessly from the floating woman's grasp. He then turned to glower at the deceptively strong deputy holding him aloft.

"Why did you have to do _that_? You know civilians aren't authorized to know what goes on here."

Apparently getting chewed out by her superior officer didn't mean a whole heck of a lot to the lovely young woman, as she scoffed loudly in reply. "_Please_. _You _dragged the guy through town on Biko's date night. If the guy's not deaf or blind, then he's _already _seen, or at least _heard_ way too much. This is all _your _fault, Old Man."

Sighing in defeat, Hercule nodded dejectedly.

"Well, you know what we have to do now, right?", muttered the older man forlornly

It was about this point that Ryouga began to get nervous. He was pretty sure he'd heard this conversation in movies before, and it _never _ended well for the subject of said conversation. Taking a _slow _step back towards the door, Ryouga raised his hands before him in a warding gesture.

"Ummm, y'know, I've done my good deed for the day. If I'm not supposed to be here, I can leave . . . immediately . . ."

Another step towards the doors. He began to feel blindly behind him for the doorknob.

Before him, Ryoko turned to regard Hercule once more. The bulky martial artist looked to Ryouga, then back to Ryoko, then gave a single nod of consent. An instant later, the spiky haired female dropped the Sheriff unceremoniously to the floor. A positively wicked smirk formed on her lips as she began to float forward, cracking her knuckles menacingly.

Still unable to find the doorknob behind him, Ryouga briefly considered simply leaping straight through the plate glass window . . . but he was in enough trouble already without adding property destruction to the list . . . he imagined. Besides, woman or not, what kind of man would be if he ran from a fight? That thought in mind, he took his own combat stance.

"Be warned, for now you face Hibiki Ry-"

OOOoooOOO

"Oww . . . w-what the _hell _just happened?"

Ryouga gingerly moved to rub his head, pulling his arm free from the masonry in which it was firmly embedded. Unfortunately, this thoughtless action had the rather unfortunate effect of dislodging the rest of his body from its custom made crater in the holding cell wall, dropping him rather unceremoniously onto his head. With great reluctance, the fanged fighter untwisted his body up and into a sitting position, where he made a brief attempt at dusting the powdered masonry from his shirt. Once this endeavor proved fruitless, he simply settled on glaring at the cyan haired monster on the other side of the iron bars.

For her part, Ryoko smiled with sinful delight.

"Most fun I've had all _week_," she exclaimed, cracking her neck absently.

It was about this time that Hercule made his way back into the conversation. Ryouga wasn't sure how long he'd been out, but the senior martial artist had apparently had the time to replace his bandanna bandage with a nice, white band of cloth which circled his wounded leg quite expertly. The mustached warrior turned to his plucky sidekick.

"Be a dear and call this one in for me, will you, Ryoko? I'm gonna head home for the night and recuperate a bit."

Hercule then made his way for the door, completely missing the enraged expression that bloomed on Ryoko's face pretty much sometime between 'Be a dear' and 'I'm gonna head home'. In fact, Ryouga considered trying to climb back into this personally fitted wall indentation when a sphere of crackling yellow energy began to coalesce between her curled fingers.

"Oh, by the way," Hercule added, just as he stepped out the door, "This kid isn't too bad, you'd better keep an eye on him until I get back."

"_What_? _All night_?"

Unfortunately, the floating young woman's disbelieving cry went unanswered, as Hercule was already out the door. Ryouga eyed the unstable looking ball of power that Ryoko had gathered, more than just a little worried at what she was planning on doing with it . . .

When, with a beleaguered sigh, the Deputy let the potentially devastating attack dissolve away to nothing. Then, grumbling mightily to herself, Ryoko floated back over to her desk and flopped back into her chair with enough force that the fragile wood creaked ominously in protest to her unbridled annoyance.

Feeling a little safer with a little more distance between him and the girl that had just so bodily tossed him into the holding cell, Ryouga allowed himself to relax and take a seat on the nearby cot. He studied the exotic looking woman for another minute or so, taking in the upset expression on her face, the stiffness of her posture and the strange red gem that appeared to be imbedded in her right wrist.

Still, as unusual as she was, his curiosity wouldn't be ignored for long.

"You know, I don't want to come across as pushy here," he began as politely as possible, given the situation, "But what the _hell is going _on? _What_ did I see too much of? _Who _are you supposed to call? What are you _going to do with me_?"

Of course, he had never really been known for his patience . . .

His sudden outburst had the positive effect of snapping the Deputy out of her irate bout of cursing to herself under her breath. Unfortunately what happened when she turned her attention back his way didn't instill him with even a shred of confidence. Rather than grace him with a supportive glance, or a reassuring smile, Ryoko chose to taunt him with a wicked smirk.

"Let me put it this way, Stud. You just stumbled across something you _really _shouldn't have."

"Story of my life." He fought the urge to roll his eyes.

"As for what we're gonna do . . . Personally, I'm gonna vote for blowing you out the airlock."

"B-but – but we aren't even _in_ space!"

Her wicked smirk became positively sinful.

"That can change pretty quick around here."

Ryouga folded his arms across his chest and slumped helplessly against the wall at the back of the cot. It appeared his usual luck with females was holding true this night as well.

"Sheesh, what do _you _have against me?"

Ryoko seemed to consider his question for a moment, before shrugging.

"Nothing, really. Just naturally vindictive and easily bored."

"Hmph, story of my life . . . again."

Well, at least the deranged deputy appeared to be in a better mood, to his detriment. The cyan haired female smiled in victory and kicked her feet back up onto the surface of her desk and proceeded to lace her hands back behind her head once more.

"Well, since I don't really _need _to sleep, and I'm stuck here anyway, might as well get a little work done."

With that, Ryoko casually lifted one of her feet into the air, only to drop her delicate looking heel onto a seemingly random button on her desk-

Only to have a bright yellow light drop from the ceiling and the wall behind her slide open. The sliding wall revealed a large, blue lighted closet filled with what appeared to be biological containment suits. As if anticipating her needs, one of the bulky suits slid out of the closet, ready for use.

Ryouga's eyes bulged from his sockets as he pointed incredulously at the gaudy suit.

"What the _hell _are you going to do with _that_?"

Ryoko chuckled an evil chuckle at his abject shock. "Sorry, wrong button."

A second later, she tapped her heel to the button again, retracting the HAZMAT suit and closing the closet. She then dropped her heel to another closely placed button. This time, the only result was a tiny device popping out of the wooden surface of the desk and tilting slightly in his direction.

"So, Guy, I've got a few questions for ya. First off, what's your name? Not that I particularly care."

He briefly considered giving his name as Saotome Ranma, but he'd be damned if he was going to hide behind his rival for anything. Besides, things didn't exactly turn out well for the last guy that pretended to be Ranma, now did they?

"Hibiki Ryouga."

Ryoko tilted her head an inch. "Hmm, nice name. Now, how did ya get down here?"

He looked at her oddly. "Um, I walked?"

She returned his odd look with interest. "Allllright . . . Then why don't ya tell me anything that struck you as _strange _when you were dragging the Sheriff through town?"

The martial artist took a moment to consider that request. Now that he thought about it, there _were_ a few things that had stuck him as being a _little _. . . off. "Well, that floating car was pretty cool, and something _did _seem a little off about that girl with the orthopedic earmuffs-"

He completely missed the absolutely baffled look that plastered itself across her face when he mentioned that detail.

"-And that crazy couple that was tearing up the streets _was _pretty impressive . . ."

He paused his musing as Ryoko let out a disgusted groan

"Don't even _remind _me. Do you know how _creepy _it is seeing a guy that's practically your uncle going out with a girl twenty thousand years too young for him? It's _just so wrong_!"

'_Riiiight_, sheesh, exaggerate much?' Sure, the guy had looked a little older than the bikini clad girl, but there was no need to blow it _that _far out of proportion.

"Anyway," Ryoko continued after a quick shudder finished rolling down her shoulders, "Last and least important. D'you know how the Sheriff got himself hurt? I'm just asking, because if you did it, I might reconsider tossing you out into space."

He leveled a flat stare in her direction. "Not much love for the boss, eh?"

She replied with another shrug. "Let's just say that Mr. Satan does a lot of barking, but _I _usually end up doing all the biting. So, do you know what happened?"

A genial nod. "Actually, I do. He was getting attacked by a pack of oversized rodents. I hopped in and helped him out, but it looked like one of those rats managed to take a bite out of him before I arrived. And you already know pretty much everything that happened after that."

This time, it was Ryoko who leveled a coldly flat glare in his direction. "You are _so_ getting launched into space . . . Still, mutant rats, eh? And that didn't strike you as odd?"

Ryouga replied with a casual shrug. "What? You've never been to Ryugenzawa?"

"Riiiight . . . Well, that sounds like enough anyway, and all I care to actually do at the moment. So . . . go to sleep or something. I don't feel like looking at your mug anymore tonight." Ryoko flicked her wrist at him in a shooing gesture, as if she expected him to scurry away like a housecat or something. As if he had anywhere to go.

Feeling a little spiteful, Ryouga folded his arms across his chest and leveled a taunting smirk her way.

"Don't you have someone you're supposed to call, or something?"

"Sheesh, I'm pretty sure this can wait till morning. Some dusty vagabond is hardly worth getting the higher ups out of bed in the middle of the night."

'Dusty vagabond? Now that was just uncalled for . . . accurate, but uncalled for.'

"Well excuse me, but considering my imminent future seems to involve getting launched into the icy depths of space, maybe you can understand my desire to find out _what the hell is going on here_?"

The irate deputy sat up in her desk, firing an equally irate glare back in his direction. "You're not just gonna fall asleep so I can sneak off, are you?"

It was Ryouga's turn to wear the vindictive smile. Being a pain in the ass could _really _be fun from time to time . . . maybe that was the reason that Ranma had seemed to do it every waking moment of his life.

The pair of warriors simply glared at each other for several long minutes, either one willing the other to spontaneously combust under the fury of their gazes alone . . . until-

With a final groan of defeat, Ryoko slumped back into her seat.

"_Fine_. I got some cards in the back, I'll go get them."

OOOoooOOO

"-so, I guess I've loved the guy since the first moment I saw him, y'know? Not that _Ayeka _could possibly understand that. I mean, I knew him his _entire life_, then she just pops out of space one day and acts like she _owns _him, or some crap."

Ryouga offered a sympathetic nod to his emotionally unburdening companion. He then shifted a bit on the not-quite-comfortable cot, to better face the lovely young woman whom was floating parallel to the ground just outside his cell. He idly wondered if a leather couch would have been more at home beneath the Deputy.

"That's pretty rough, Deputy. This Tenchi sounds like a pretty nice guy. Maybe a bit of a pushover when it comes to women, but I can relate to that a bit."

A weak chuckle was his reply, before Ryoko was glaring again. "And you would not _believe _how bratty Ayeka can be. Sometimes it feels like her entire existence is devoted to making mine worse!"

"Heh, heh. Actually, I think I can relate to _that _pretty well, too. Though I have to admit that I have it a little better, since my nemesis hasn't been around lately . . ."

At that, Ryoko stretched lazily, once more reinforcing the unshakable mental image that he got of a feline when he looked at her. The amber eyed woman looked about ready to launch into another diatribe about her own personal devil, when she happened to notice the sunlight streaming in through the windows-

"_Holy_! It's that early already? Man, I better call the GD people to come and deal with you already."

Ryouga looked down to his own wrist, gazing at the bare patch of skin where he sincerely wished a watch resided. Trying to tell the time by the sun's position in the sky wasn't nearly as easy as the History Channel made is seem, and heaven forbid you try to catch the Five-Fifteen bus by solar time. A disappointing moment later, he let out a weary sigh.

"I have to admit that I kind of hoped you had forgotten about that."

The light chime of a bell heralded a visitor.

"Heh, I'm surprised she _didn't_, man."

Ryouga's head spun so fast he nearly broke his own neck.

'_That voice_!'

There, against all expectations, standing as non-chalantly as if he _hadn't _been missing for the past three years . . . was the one and only Saotome Ranma.

"_Ranma_? W-what the hell are _you _doing here?"

The pigtailed boy . . . man, actually, with pigtail now trailing halfway down his back, actually had the audacity to chuckle.

"I'd ask _you _the same question, but in your case, it's painfully obvious."

"_Raaaanmaaa_!"

Ranma then turned to Ryoko. "Don't worry about making the call, I know how much you hate talkin' to the Head of Research. I'll take Ryouga up to the facility myself."

Ryoko glared balefully at the blue eyed martial artist. "How the heck did you even know he was here?"

Ranma simply shrugged in reply. "Swung by Hercule's for our mornin' spar, cept he was all laid up. He told me what happened last night and gave me a little description of the guy that saved his sorry butt. Heh, all it took was 'ridiculous bandanna' and I just _knew_ who it had to be. Of course, hearing that Ryouga was behind bars here, I just _had _to see it with my own eyes . . . Oh, and on a related note, you're on your own today, Ryoko."

Ryoko flopped back into her chair, rolling her eyes in annoyance.

"Ain't _that _the story of my life?"

Ryouga couldn't help but chuckle.

"Alright then. I'll bring the transport around. This guy doesn't look like much-"

"_Hey_!"

"-But he's got a nice right hook."

Ranma waved off her concern without a care in the world.

"Don't bother. I'm an old hand at keeping P-Chan here on a short leash."

"_Rrrranma_!"

"Besides, considering he's locked up like that, I'm assuming he saw something he wasn't supposed to, right? This'll give me a chance to explain what's goin on to the guy."

Ryoko just shrugged, wriggling herself more deeply into her well cushioned chair. "Like I care; I'm not the Sheriff. If the guy escapes it's on his head." With that, the cyan haired demoness tossed the pigtailed fighter a set of shiny keys. "Here, take my jeep. S'not like I ever use it."

Ranma looked at the keys for a moment, possibly fascinated by the shiny objects, then casually tossed them back. "Naw, I think it's a good day for a walk. Besides . . . I got a _lot _to catch him up on."

The unlikely Deputy gave him a skeptical look. "You're going to _walk _a potentially dangerous security breach to the GD facility?"

Only to have Ranma scoff loudly and turn towards Ryouga himself. "Hey, Ryouga, if I let you outta that cell are you gonna make a run for it?"

Ryouga scoffed with even more enthusiasm. "Are you insane? I've finally found you after three years. I'm going to get my answers even if I have to wring them out of your battered corpse."

The Anything Goes martial artist sighed fondly for some reason. "Awww, that's the stuff. I gotta say I missed the casual death threats." He then turned back to Ryoko. "See? We're good. He ain't goin nowhere."

"Fine, fine." Ryoko let out a weak groan. "Just let me get the guy out."

With that, she once again lackadaisically lifted her heel, only to drop in onto another random button on her desk-

Instantly causing a three foot by three foot column to extend down from the roof with startling speed . . . almost directly where Ranma was standing. With a frantic cry, the pigtailed man rolled to the side as the pillar, covered in racks and hanging enough futuristic firepower to probably wipe out a small country, slammed heavily into the ground he'd occupied only a second earlier.

"_Hey_!"

"Oops," Ryoko supplied, fingers held daintily over her lips, "Clumsy me."

"That was no accident! . . . Damnit, stop laughing, P-Chan!"

OOOoooOOO

Several minutes and _many _bouts of boisterous laughter later, Ryouga found himself being led down one of the many bustling streets of the pleasant looking little town. All around him, feats of brilliance were displayed for all the world to see: cyborg's walking dogs, children writing advanced mathematical formulae on the sidewalk in chalk and even one man pulling out a tiny capsule, only to drop in on the ground and have it explode into a full sized car . . .

And yet the only thing Ryouga found he could do was to stare disbelievingly at the man that walked at his side. He was almost tempted to reach out and poke the crimson shirted martial artist, if only to confirm that he was actually real and not just a figment. Between his rival's ridiculously unexpected reappearance after _three years_, and all of the other craziness he'd experienced within just the last twelve hours, the Lost Boy honestly had no idea where to even begin.

So the duo continued to walk in silence, Ryouga staring at Ranma out of the corner of his eye, and Ranma gently redirecting him whenever he began to veer off course. Of course, the silence was doomed to end, sooner or later. After nearly ten minutes of stiff silence, Ranma finally turned to regard him, a nostalgic look in his eyes.

"Y'know, I gotta say it's good to see you again, Ryouga. It's been way too long since I've seen anyone from the old crew."

And just like that, the ghostly dweamor that had been clinging to his perceptions was brushed away. All at once, three years of bitterness and anger surged back to the front of his mind, his most familiar and trusted companions. It was all he could do to restrain himself to simply scowling at his rival's cocky, smirking face.

"Cut the small talk, Ranma, this isn't a _friendly visit_. You just _vanish _for three years, not a word to anyone, not a care for anyone, and I find you laughing it up _here _of all places . . . wherever the hell _here _is."

Again, his pigtailed rival possessed the audacity to chuckle in amusement.

"Trust me, this is the _last _place I expected to see _you _too, but, then considering it's you, I guess it makes perfect sense."

A low growl resonated in Ryouga's throat.

"Damnit, Ranma, this isn't the time for your idiotic attempts at humor! I've been attacked by mutant rats, tossed into prison and threatened with explosive decompression! What the _hell _is going on in this crazy town, and what the _hell does it have to do with you_?"

"Sheesh, P-Chan, calm down. I already promised that I'd explain. So, where do you want me to start? From my _disappearance_, or just jump right ahead to the steaming pile that you just stepped in?"

The Hibiki grimaced at the somewhat apt analogy, and his desire to find out just what the hell was going on was stronger than his desire to ram a curled fist into his rival's smirking face . . . if only barely. Finally, the frustrated fighter let out a weak sigh, his shoulders slumping in defeat.

"You might as well start from the start. It's not like I have anything better to do."

Ranma nodded, looking a touch sympathetic. Not to mention the guy was taking his outbursts _really _well. "Fair enough. Say, you remember that last wedding, right?"

Ryouga felt a shudder run up his spine before he nodded weakly.

"Mostly as a blur of explosions, pain and horrible disappointment, but yes."

"Odd, that's how I remember it too . . ."

"You know, now that I think of it, I never _did _get my wedding gift back."

"Talk to Nabiki 'bout that."

"Ummm . . . on second thought, I don't need it back that bad."

Ranma snickered quietly. "Smart man. Anyway, after that disaster, I decided to go on a short training trip. Y'know, clear my head?"

Yes, Ryouga could understand that quite well, it was pretty much the same thing he had done, though likely for slightly different reasons. He offered his rival an almost imperceptible nod.

"How's Akari, by the way? I remember she was your guest at that one, wasn't she?" asked Ranma out of the blue.

Ryouga nodded once more, slightly annoyed at the detour from the topic at hand . . . and the memories it stirred up.

"Not that it's any of your business, but the last time I saw her, we were discussing getting married."

A broad, genuine smile verily burst onto Ranma's face at that piece of news. The raven haired man slapped a companionable hand onto his shoulder.

"Congrats, man! That's _great _news. So, how long ago was that?"

The Lost Boy could only let out an agonized sigh.

"About a year and a half ago . . ."

His companion's wince did not go unnoticed. "Ooooooh . . . ouch . . ."

"Yeah . . . pretty much. But enough about how I ruined my life, I want to hear about how you ruined yours."

Despite the joyous news that Ryouga had just unloaded, Ranma was somehow smirking again already.

"_Ruined_? Ha! That training trip was the best decision of my life! Y'see, while I was trainin' one day, this group of guys wandered into my campsite. They were all wearing suits and shades, real men in black types, y'know? Anyway, one of 'em was a woman, and, of all things, she offers me a _job_."

"A job? What kind of job could super secret government looking types offer you?" Almost immediately an obvious, if somewhat clichéd scenario popped into the wanderer's head and he gasped aloud. "You aren't letting them transform you into some kind of Ultimate Cyborg Killing Machine, are you?"

He was rewarded for his imagination with a smack upside the head.

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. I'm not even _in _the cybernetics department. No, you moron, they offered me a position as a researcher. Heh, heh, I'm an egghead now, Ryouga."

Ryouga leveled the flattest stare he could muster at his long time rival. "_Yeeeaaah_ . . . I think my idea was more plausible than that. What kind of company would hire _you?_ What kind of research could _you _possibly do, and while we're on the subject, why on earth would they even approach you in the first place?"

Apparently the Saotome Heir wasn't expecting so much utter disbelief and glowered back at him. "Those are fair questions, I suppose . . . _Jerk_. Let me ask you a question first, though. Have you ever heard of a company called Global Dynamics?"

'Global Dynamics?' He wracked his mind for a moment, but- "Well, I'm hardly an avid stock watcher at the best of times. Off the top of my head, nothing comes to mind."

His companion nodded quickly to himself. "Well, that's good. _No one _is supposed to know about Global Dynamics, so if you did, it'd probably mean you're a spy or something."

"Why? Do you do something worse than tossing people into space if they're spies?" Ryouga asked flippantly.

His wry attempt at humor garnered a chuckle from the Saotome. "They ain't gonna toss ya into space . . . at least, I haven't _heard _about them doing that to anyone . . . on purpose . . ."

His response was a searing glower.

Ranma held up his hands to ward off his ire. "Just kidding, just kidding, sheesh. Anyway, GD is, like, the biggest scientific research company on the _planet_. They cover _everything_, I'm talkin' Aerodynamics to Zoology and everything in between."

Ryouga was having a hard time concealing his skepticism.

"I'm serious, man. We're _decades_ ahead of anything on the market today, and that's just in the basic stuff, you don't even wanna _know _the kind of stuff the higher ups are working on. 'Course, to pull that off, GD recruits the best and the brightest from around the world, the real pioneers of their fields, and puts them to work. Unfortunately for you, considering just how much scientific research goes on here, this place is so highly classified by the government that you even stumbling through here is practically treason."

Ryouga's eyes bulged at _that _little tidbit of joy. He'd been in trouble before, but not like this! "Treason? Well isn't _that _great? So instead of a space walk, I get a firing squad?"

Ranma's eyes rolled in annoyance. "Oh, for cryin' out loud, calm down, ya big baby. We'll figure out some way to get you outta this. Worse comes to worse, you can be my lab assistant or something. Heh, that actually ain't a bad idea . . ."

'Lab Assistant? What the hell?'

"Lab Assistant? What the hell? Wait a second, what the heck are you researching anyway? There's no way that _you _are a cyberneticist. You can't even program a VCR!"

"Ahh, shaddup, P-Chan. S'not like you can, either. And, it just so happens-" Ranma dipped into a mocking bow. "-that you are speaking with the Head Researcher of GD's brand spankin' new Ki Application Division."

That brought Ryouga up short. He turned an incredulous eye towards the preening young researcher.

"You're _what_?"

"Heh, that's right! Ya remember how I told you that those Blues Brother's wannabes came out to recruit me while I was training?"

The fanged fighter could only nod dumbly.

"Well, it turns out that _Dr. Tofu_, of all people, sent them my way. Turns out that our absentee chiropractor had been working for GD for nearly a year. He started up the Ki Application Division himself, and suggested me to be the first addition to his department. So, now I get to spend all my time researching Martial Arts and developing new techniques! It's almost the perfect job."

His rival's latest diatribe raised so many questions in the Lost One's head that he couldn't even imagine where to begin, so he just latched on to the one that hit closest to home for him. Shaking his head in disbelief (yet again), he glared at his companion.

"Wait, wait, _wait_! You're telling me that you're getting paid likely a ridiculous sum of money to do nothing but _train_? How is that _not_ the perfect job?"

Again he found himself staring dumbly as, out of the blue, Ranma let out a beleaguered sigh and dropped a hand onto his shoulder.

"Unfortunately, buddy, life is full of compromises. You know that as well as anybody, don't ya?"

Ryouga nodded slowly.

"Well, my job is one of those compromises." An unusually serious expression settled on the usually carefree man's face. "Y'see, Dr. Tofu _used _to be the Head of our Division, focusing most of his research on healing and medical techniques, which is cool. However, the higher ups decided that they needed something more _valuable _to justify the funding for Dr. Tofu's work."

Well, that didn't make any sense to the wanderer. "What could possibly be more valuable than medical advances?"

The look that his rival shot him was easily one of the most cynical that he'd ever seen.

"Don't be naïve, Ryouga. The government wants _military applications_. It's a harsh deal, man. I gotta figure out the best ways that I can to kill people, so Dr. Tofu can get the money to find ways to help them."

"Wow . . . that _is _harsh."

"Tell me about it . . ."

With that rather heartwarming admission, their conversation gave way to an uncomfortable silence that stretched on for several minutes, neither one of them really knowing what to say. Ryouga was certain that Ranma's moody silence was for a very different than his own, though. There were just so many questions floating around his brain that they were practically playing bumper cars.

Ranma, a researcher? Tofu, finally rediscovered? Ryouga, launched into space?

The last one wasn't getting any less worrisome the more he thought about it. And as much of a fan as he was of uncomfortable silences, his curiosity, and self preservation instincts, would not remain silent for long.

"I know I'll probably regret this," the bandanna clad warrior started slowly, "But tell me more about this company, Global Dynamics. Who do they work for? How long have they been around? How many vagabonds have they made disappear?"

His rival must not have picked up the deadly serious tone of Ryouga's voice in his last question, as Ranma chuckled quietly to himself.

"Well, I can give ya the speech they gave me at orientation. Apparently, not too long after world war two, some famous scientist guy, Albert Somethin-or-Other, told the U.S. government that science was the future. I guess the guy had some serious sway, too, cuz they totally bought it. They started gathering all the smartest guys around and stuck em together in a little town out in the middle of nowhere in the States."

Ryouga stopped dead in his tracks.

"W-wait just a second. _We're in America_?"

Only to have Ranma roll his eyes in exasperation. "No, moron. About five years ago, GD, the company that handles all the research over in Eureka-"

"_Eureka_? You're making less sense by the second, Saotome."

This time, Ranma swatted him upside the head. "Just shut up and listen, P-Chan. Eureka is the name of the town all the researchers live in America. We're in the Japanese Branch, kind of a Eureka East, if you will."

Ryouga offered the pigtailed researched a skeptical look. "Japanese Branch?"

"A little slower on the uptake than usual today, eh?" joked his rival, before continuing, "_As I was saying_, about five years ago, GD approached the Japanese Government about setting shop here, too. Apparently Japan has its fair share of geniuses, so it must have seemed like a good idea at the time."

The wanderer had to let out an impressed whistle. "Wow, in just five years, an American company not only struck a deal with our government, but they also set up a complete town for you . . . And there must be a central research facility that you're taking me to . . . That must have cost a _fortune _to get set up and running in such a short time."

Ranma's bark of laughter caught him a little off guard.

"That's the best part! GD was able to start up _immediately_. You see, there was a rival research company, so GD pulled off a hostile takeover. They got a fully functional facility, a set of experimental super computers, a preexisting town, and even a sweet ass GeoFront to cover it all up. Man, what was the name of that company . . . Gehern . . . Nerve . . . something like that . . ."

Yet another slew of questions assaulted the Lost One, so he just latched onto the first one that sprang to mind.

"What the heck is a GeoFront?"

In a sense of fair play, it appeared that fate decreed it was Ranma's turn to start shooting _him _incredulous glances.

". . . You've gotta be kidding me. Are you telling me that you _didn't notice_?"

"Notice what?"

"Shessh! Look up, genius."

Not sure where his rival was going with this, and more than a little suspicious of some kind of humiliating prank, he slowly glanced up-

Only to have his legs collapse out from under him and drop him painfully to his butt as his mind did its futile best to comprehend the impossibility it had just been presented. The only thing he could do was point dumbly as he stuttered in shock.

"T-t-there's a _city floating in the sky_!"

His finger pointed unerringly at the numerous, skeletal frames of what looked to be a city caught in the middle of actually being built. 'W-w-w-wha-'

His computational logic loop was broken by the nerve wracking sound of his rival laughing his moronic ass off. Ryouga turned to fire a death glare at the braying jerk. Seeing his ire, Ranma settled down to merely chuckling in amusement.

"No it ain't. It's hanging from the GeoFront. We're _underground_, man. My God, Ryouga, how did you not notice that? Hell, for that matter, how did you even get down here?"

Ranma, between chuckles, then leaned down and offered him a hand to his feet. Needless to say, Ryouga slapped the offending appendage away and pushed himself up to his feet.

"It was night time when I got here, so how was I to know? And besides! It's as bright as day down here! If we're in a giant cave, then why the hell is it so bright?"

This pigtailed scientist raised a finger to make a point . . . only to lower it, then raise it again . . . only to drop it one final time. "Ummm . . . _science_?"

Ryouga let out a colossal groan of disgust.

"And _you _are supposed to be a genius?"

"Aw, shaddup. When I receive a Nobel Prize for definitively proving that Chi is simply a variant of Psionics, then we'll see who's laughing!"

Ryouga's hackles rose instantly.

"_What_? Chi and psychic energy are completely different!"

"_Oh_, and what do _you _know, Mr. Lost-Ninety-Percent-Of-The-Time?"

"Chi is the power of your spirit, of your very soul! You can't just quantify and explain it away with your _science_!"

His devilishly annoying rival scoffed in a most bemused tone. "Just as I expected. An antique point of view from an antique martial artist."

"_Antique_! I oughta pound you into the ground, you – you Quack!"

"Relic!"

"Sell-out!"

"_Fanatic_!"

"_Heretic_!"

"_Numbskull_!"

"_Bread Thief_!"

"_Oh_, _oh_, it _always _comes back to that! I thought we were past that!"

"Never!_ Die, Ranma_!"

Ryouga crouched down and prepared to launch himself forward. The tingling sensation of eager anticipation was already rolling up his spine, the long absent, yet intimately familiar yearning to throw everything that he was against the seemingly unassailable pedestal that his rival stood upon, hoping, more than anything, to topple the brilliant warrior, if only for a time-

Except, rather than respond in kind, Ranma simply held out a stalling hand.

"Whoa there, buddy. As much as I'd love beating you into the dirt, don't you think you're in enough trouble without attacking what amounts to a government employee?"

And, just like that, Ryouga's euphoric battle lust was crushed to dust by the harsh weight of cruel reality.

"Oh . . . right . . ." Well, _that _was intensely disappointing. He was _really _itching for a fight now, and there was only one opponent he could think of that would satisfy him now.

. . . Was it just him, or did that sound a little gay, even in his own head?

He shook off his disturbing thought quickly and turned back to Ranma.

"_So_, how long till we get there, anyway?"

A quick snicker from his rival quirked his interest. Ranma then took exactly five steps further down the road they had been traveling down during their long conversation. The pigtailed man then gestured grandly to the long stretch of road that sprawled out into the distance.

"We're already there."

Ryouga offered him a generously skeptical gaze, immediately prompting Ranma to smile in an even _more _infuriating manner.

"What, you never seen a hologram projector before?"

And, with that seemingly innocuous question, his rival took another step forward-

Only to vanish into thin air.

Ryouga could only boggle in disbelief at the miraculous disappearance of his companion. Had the Anything Goes fighter truly mastered the UmiSenKen to such an unbelievable degree . . . or . . . ?"

His musings were cut off, as Ranma suddenly reappeared, or, at least his torso and head did. The smugly smirking martial artist waved an energetic signal for Ryouga to join him. "C'mon, Ryouga, yer gonna _love _this one!"

Hesitant, but not willing to show even an ounce of reluctance before his hated . . . well, at the very least disliked, rival, Ryouga quickly moved forward and stepped across the intangible threshold which Ranma appeared to be straddling.

A moment later, without even a tingle to signify the transition to where he had been to where he was now, Ryouga knew that he had passed through the invisible barrier which his companion had already breached . . .

The giant black pyramid which had suddenly appeared before him was a pretty good hint of that.

Another quiet chuckle from the blue eyed man beside him drew his attention away from the monolithic structure for a moment.

"Overkill, I know, considering we're already underground, but when the Head Researcher heard that the American Branch had one . . . well . . ." Ranma explained . . . well, not at all, really.

Ryouga could only shake his head.

"Let's just get this over with. Space is actually starting to sound like a nice alternative about now."

OOOoooOOO

Roughly two hours of wandering through endless, twisting, turning, monotonous and disturbingly similar looking corridors, the pair of frazzled martial artists finally found themselves (with the helpful intervention of at least a half a dozen various GD employees) wandering down the correct corridor which would lead them to their ultimate destination. By unspoken agreement, neither one dared speak of the incredibly, indelibly, _unbelievably _scenic route they had taken; one out of embarrassment for having worked there for so long, and the other for . . . obvious reasons.

"So, whom are you taking me to talk to, anyway? The Head Researcher?" Ryouga asked, finally breaking the latest in a series of multi-minute stretches of silence between the two.

At the mere mention of his question, a visible shudder ran up the pigtailed researcher's spine and he shook his head quickly. "Naw, not even _you _are that unlucky. I'm just takin' you to talk to the Government Liaison. The worst that _he _would do is have you shot."

Ryouga fired a heated glare in his rival's direction. "Oh, is that all?"

Ranma's only response was to smile vindictively and lead them the rest of the way down the corridor, to the large door which rested at its conclusion. The Saotome Heir raised his hand to knock, only to strike air as the door swiftly slid open of its own volition . . . either that, or it was just really skilled at evading attacks . . .

His companion simply rolled his eyes at the display before walking forward into the room beyond.

. . . And what a room it was. The massive chamber, all the more imposing for its ominous black walls and ceiling, almost felt like he was standing on the perilous edge of some unknown abyss as he stared into it. Only the massive bank of windows at the far end of the room dispelled the unsettling illusion created. The windows also had the dramatic effect of silhouetting the lone desk which rested before it, as well as the indistinct figure which sat behind the solitary piece of furniture.

The strange symbols etched into the floor, like some of the religious pictography that the wanderer had become privy to over his long sojourns across the globe, stood out starkly against the black floor, filling most of the space between the door and the desk.

It took a moment for Ryouga's eyes to readjust to the strange dichotomy of blackened room and natural light provided by the vast windows. It wasn't until Ranma had led them halfway across the room, that he could finally make out the figure sitting calmly behind the desk. It appeared to be a man maybe only a few years older than themselves, with dark hair and the start of a very fine beard making an appearance. The latter was a little harder to make out, though, as the man's gloved hands were currently folded before his mouth, covering his mouth. As the man regarded them, he tilted his head slightly, his glasses glinting in the light.

'Wait a second . . . isn't the light coming from _behind _him?' Ryouga pondered silently.

"Doctor Saotome." The strangely imposing figure stated the pigtailed researcher's name with absolute calm and poise.

Apparently Ranma didn't limit his annoying attitude to just Ryouga any longer, as he responded with a familiar cocky wave.

"Agent Ikari. It's a drag to meet you, as always. Anyways, I gotchyer trespasser right here. His name is-"

"Hibiki Ryouga. Age: Twenty-One. Residence: Unknown. Occupation: Unknown. Suspected of . . . innumerable counts of vandalism and property destruction _world wide_."

Ryouga tugged at his suddenly constricting collar, beginning to feel more than a little hot under it. His nervous anxiety wasn't helped at all when his rival turned a suspicious eye his way.

"World wide? You ain't been moonlighting on me, have ya? Getting into rivalries with some _other_ martial artist?"

The Lost One waved his hands frantically. "_What_? No! _No_! It's just . . . y'know, it's been three years and I _do _have a life outside of you . . . you know?"

Ranma crossed his arms firmly across his chest and let out a loud, disapproving sniff. "Oh yeah? Like _what_?"

Running a hand through his hair in embarrassment, the wandering Hibiki recounted some of his more recent misadventures. "Well . . . there was this Uremeshi guy that I tagged along with for a bit. A couple of us got dragged into some weird tournament, but I got lost before the last round. Then I ran into this really strange Kendoist named Ichigo, a couple of us had to go to some strange, mystical land to rescue a friend of his . . . I think it was France . . . But no rivalries, I swear!"

Despite his assurances, his pigtailed companion continued to shoot a suspicious glare in his direction. Before the blue eyed martial artist could reply, though-

"_If _you gentlemen are completely finished-" Agent Ikari interrupted them-

"We are _not_." Only to be interrupted himself in kind.

Rather than rise to the bait, the deadly serious looking man retained his icy calm. Instead, the government liaison simply tilted his head forward a fraction, causing his glasses to glint in the light once more, hiding his eyes from view.

"Yes . . . you are."

The tone in the man's voice was so cold, that Ryouga found himself standing straight before he even realized what he was doing; to his side, he noticed Ranma do the same. Agent Ikari then turned his attention away from the researcher, instead focusing it on him.

"I am afraid, Mr. Hibiki, that you have stumbled across something which you most assuredly should not have. Considering the _highly _confidential nature of the work we do here, this unfortunate incident leaves me with very few options."

The sitting man's lip curled up into a cruel smirk, barely visible from beneath his folded hands. Ryouga gulped, as a tingle of anxiety ran a marathon up his spine.

"The first and easiest option, is to simply take you behind the chemical shed and have you shot."

The fanged warrior's eyes nearly bugged out at the frank and frankly chilling statement. He wasn't sure which was worse, the threat, or the casual ease with which it was delivered, as if it was second nature to this man.

"The second option-"

"Is the space walk?" He asked miserably.

And then, in an almost complete about face, Agent Ikari lowered his hands and smiled a genuine, amused smile.

"I see you've been speaking to Ryoko. A wicked imagination that one has." Then, just like that, the smile vanished as if it had never been. "No, the second option is that you sign Global Dynamic's Non-Disclosure Agreement. It is a legally binding document which, if you divulge anything of what you have seen here to _anyone _. . ."

A weak sigh escaped Ryouga's lips. "The space walk?"

The smile reappeared, though there was nothing amusing about it this time.

"If you are lucky."

Ryouga considered this for a moment. He then considered it for another moment, familiar anger rising within his heart once more.

"Wait a second! My two choices are to get shot or to sign a stupid _contract_?" With that, the bandanna clad wanderer spun and slapped his pigtailed companion upside the head. "You Jerk! Why didn't you tell me about the contract? You had me worried over nothing!"

Ranma rubbed the back of his head, disguising his attempt to assuage the pain by primping his hair. "Heh, you haven't seen the paperwork you're gonna have to fill out. I've been here for _years _and I still haven't finished it yet!"

"That is because," Ikari expounded helpfully, "Once you realized you would not be permitted to leave the GeoFront until you finished it, you stopped halfway through."

A helpless chuckle escaped the pigtailed researcher's lips and he offered a weak shrug. "Yeah, well, it gave me a good excuse not to head home, didn't it?"

Ikari could only shake his head. Finding himself in perfect agreement with the bespectacled Agent, Ryouga sighed in disgust at his rival's attitude.

The Liaison then turned back his way. "Mr. Hibiki, you will be required to remain within the GeoFront until you have fully completed the Non-Disclosure Agreement. Is that understood?"

He nodded quickly and agreeably. "Considering the alternative? Don't worry, I'm not the lazy wastrel that Saotome is-"

"Hey!"

"Excellent. I shall have the documents transferred to the Sheriff's office." Ikari then slid his eyes back to Ranma. "If you would, please escort Mr. Hibiki back to his cell."

Ryouga deflated a bit at that wonderful piece of news. Of course, his depression was quickly replaced with annoyance as Ranma smirked wickedly.

"It would be my pleasure."

With a defeated sigh, Ryouga didn't wait to be dismissed. Instead he simply turned towards the door . . . no, that was the wall . . . no, that was the window again . . . ah, there it was-

Without warning, the floor beneath his feet began shaking violently. Luckily years of training kept him from falling on his face and making an ass of himself; all around him, the entire room shook, particles of dust floated down from the ceiling and even the windows vibrated dangerously behind Ikari's desk . . .

And then it was done.

Ryouga could only stare at Ranma, who stared at him, who stared at Ikari, who stared at them both, who both stared at him. At which point, Agent Ikari very calmly pushed his glasses back up to the bridge of his nose. Then, without missing a beat, the older man reached down and picked up the phone resting on his desk with all of the emotionless serenity of a mountain lake.

Almost as an afterthought, right before speaking into the receiver, Ikari gazed impassively at the two of them.

"That will be all."

Not sure what else they could possibly do, Ryouga and Ranma both shrugged in unison . . . and made their way to the door.


	2. Despite all my Rage

Eureka - Despite All My Rage, I'm Still Just A Mouse In A Maze.

Chapter 2

Okay, here we are at chapter two.

First off, a quick shout of to Claymade, who was generous enough to Beta this chapter for me, thus improving it simply by being on the same internet. Oh, yeah and I guess there was some kind of correction and comment componenent as well.

Anyway, I suppose I should give a brief glimpse of the flimsy reason that I'm writing this story. At first, it was simply to act as a diversion from DT, since I've been told I suck at it now, heh. Of course, at that time, it was a toss up between this story and an even stranger story featuring DT's Raven, writing a fanfiction about the Titans and the Ranma friends set in the World of Darkness mythos, and having it continually read over by Cyborg. I dunno, the story about a person in the midst of writing a story seemed interesting, and it was ridiculously easy to begin putting people into roles, but in the end I think it would have been a little too surreal.

This fic, on the other hand, is more of a challenge to myself now. After all, I tackled the dreaded Fusion with KB, and that turned out smashingly. So this time, I decided to break as many taboos as I could at once and see if I could still make it work. It started off as the oft maligned 'Crossing Anime with a Live Action Series'. At the same time, it's almost a Fusion, since there are obvious analogues forming, but at the same time, it isn't since the entire Eureka cast is present, if just not there. Then, of course, there was branching out into the MegaCross, which far more often than not tends to get overly complicated and unreadable (though some of my favorite stories have been megacrosses, so it can go either way.) Finally, I wanted to go the opposite route of KB, which was about as dark as you can get without being a Darkfic, and see how I could pull off a purely silly fic. Anyway, enough of that. Here's a quick list of the crosses, both blatant and inferred, from chapter one. (And I don't own any of them by the way.)

Ranma 1/2

Eureka

The Road To Cydonia (zmz1999 gets bonus points for picking it out)

Dragon Ball Z

Chobits

Project A-ko

Tenchi

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Cooking Master Boy (Anyone, anyone?)

Yu Yu Hakusho

Bleach

And more to come . . .

Enjoy if you will, Tolerate if you won't.

OOOoooOOO

Ryouga let out a weary groan, reaching up to rub the palms of his hands into his throbbing eyes – only to yelp as he realized, pointedly, that the pen he'd been writing with was still in his. The frustrated wanderer let out a few choice curses in the general direction of the honorless and cowardly writing implement. Predictably, it was resilient to his verbal jibes. Sure, he could snap the accursed thing like a matchstick, but then he'd just have hands covered in ink, and really, who would that help?

With slightly more force than necessary, he finished applying the fifth and final signature to the document he was working on, before flipping the sheaf of paper to the finished pile. It was with a most sour expression that he looked over the 'Completed Pile' and the 'Yet to be Completed Pile'. What was the saying? 'Ten pages down, about Two Cubic Feet of Wood Pulp to go?' The massive stack of paper that represented the unsigned portion of his Non-Disclosure Agreement loomed over him, mocking him with its lengthy clauses and twisting lawyer speak. It looked like a damned excerpt from a bad cartoon, now that he thought of it; who had contracts that long anyway?

With a sigh, he turned to glance at the young deputy currently lounging behind her desk. "You know, I'm starting to think that space walk idea of yours wasn't so bad."

Ryoko offered him the sweetest smile he'd seen this side of Akari. "That's why I suggested it, cuz I'm just the kindest, _sweetest _little thing you ever will see!"

Ryouga couldn't have stopped his eyes from rolling if he'd tried. "_Riiiight_."

He did another quick scan of the rather sparse Sheriff's Office. "Now where the heck is Saotome with our coffee? I think my spinal fluid is starting to dry up."

A mere moment later, as if summoned by the utterance of Saotome's name, the familiar door chime rang, heralding the return of the pigtailed scientist. He entered the office, casually juggling three cups of steaming hot coffee with one hand while holding a box of donuts in the other.

"I have returned . . . with _coffee_!"

Before Ryouga even had time to mutter the traditional 'About time', Ranma winged one of the cups in his direction. The small cup of scalding liquid flew unerringly through the bars of his cell and he absently caught the beverage without even looking up from his paperwork. The pigtailed martial artist then strolled over to Ryoko's desk and handed her the second cup. The cyan haired Deputy even had the decency to nod thankfully before taking a long sip from her coffee.

"So, how goes the office job?" Ranma asked, blowing on his coffee for a moment before partaking.

The Hibiki scoffed loudly. "Well, I'm starting to see why you never finished. I feel like I'm trying to negotiate a loan from Nabiki just reading this."

Ranma immediately burst into laughter at his joke, however their female companion graced the both of them with a confused stare. "Huh? What the heck is so funny?"

Shaking his head from side to side, the Saotome heir looked like he was about to give Ryoko the entire 'Nabiki Spiel' – When there was a knock at the door.

Considering that even in his short time there, Ryouga hadn't seen anyone else bother knocking before simply entering the Sheriff's Office, he joined his compatriots in glancing toward the door with interest. A moment later the door swung open, yet again slamming into the tiny bell and eliciting a perky jingle, allowing a rather unusual pair of individuals to enter the Sheriff's Office.

The first was a young woman, maybe only a year or two younger than Ryouga and Ranma themselves. Her flaming red hair flowed over her shoulders and down to mid-back, running in sharp contrast to the sleeveless purple top and the black, hip hugging slacks she wore. More exotic to the wanderer, though, were her brilliant emerald eyes.

Of course, as stunning as the woman was, she was almost commonplace compared to the person she was apparently leading around. After all, even by Ryouga's standards, a middle-aged man with blue skin was just plain odd. The bulky lab coat, baby mullet and facial scar all just added to the already bizarre appearance of the male.

Ryoko, being Ryoko, was not even remotely as interested in the odd duo as Ryouga was, and snorted loudly to get the pair's attention.

"Yo, what do ya want?"

The redhead strode forward, smiling confidently. Ryouga noticed, and he supposed it would be pretty much impossible for his rival to miss, that the way the young woman walked spoke volumes. If she wasn't a martial artist, and a decent one to boot, Ryouga would eat his own bandanna.

"I'm Kim Possible, the new Global Dynamics Recruiter."

The Deputy's eyebrow rose lazily.

"So?"

Apparently the blue skinned stranger found Ryoko's attitude to be quite humorous, as he snickered quietly to himself. The self proclaimed recruiter's eyes narrowed, as she obviously didn't share her companion's sense of humor.

"_So_, I have a new recruit here and I need you to take me to the Global Dynamics facility to meet with the Head of Research."

A familiar smirk wormed its way onto the cyan haired demoness' face as she threw her feet up onto her desk, leaning back to get more comfortable.

"So sorry, Princess, but I've gotta keep an eye on our prisoner here. _Very _important work, you know?"

Feeling a bit bad for the Possible woman, Ryouga waved helplessly from his cell. He was more than used to Ryoko's . . . 'helpfulness' by that point.

Ryoko then turned to Ranma, who had set himself up rather comfortably in the Sheriff's chair while the back and forth had been going on.

"How bout you, Lady Fingers? Up for another run?"

Apparently not feeling overly helpful himself, Ranma lifted his coffee in a mock salute. "Sorry, I just went on break."

"I'll take them," Ryouga offered quickly. He did so hate to see people get jerked around, considering that about half of his life was composed of getting jerked around in one way or another. Of course, his generous offer prompted uproarious laughter to begin flowing from said jerks.

"Ha! Nice try buddy!"

"Ha! You? _Leading _anyone?"

"Shut up, Ranma!"

"Make me . . . oh, wait, _you can't_!"

"_Damn you_!"

"_Excuse me_!" Miss Possible's sharp outburst was enough to immediately silence both martial artists. "If none of you are going to help me, could one of you at least give me directions?"

Ryoko, looking faintly annoyed by the fact that this Kim Possible lady had interrupted a promising fight between Ryouga and Ranma, snorted in a most unladylike fashion. "Sheesh, don't get your panties in a bunch. I'll call the facility and they'll send someone to pick you up. Why don't ya take a seat?"

Releasing a resigned sigh, the redhead led her blue skinned companion to the cell door.

"Can you open the cell for a minute? Dr. Drakken is still considered a security risk, so I've been ordered to keep him secured until he's spoken to the Head of Research."

Obviously not caring, Ryoko shrugged her shoulders before dropping her heel down on one of the buttons of her desktop. To Ryouga's relief, the cell door actually swung open. The blue skinned Doctor scowled darkly for a moment, but allowed himself to be ushered into the cell, where he quickly moved to sit on the cot beside Ryouga's. Then, with a silent swish, the door closed once more, locking the pair of them in with the small mountain of paperwork that threatened to overwhelm the wanderer.

Satisfied that her charge wasn't going anywhere, the redheaded recruiter then turned her attention to Ranma. "Hey, um, I don't suppose you could tell me where you got that coffee, could you?"

In typical Saotome fashion, the pigtailed lady killer graced Kim with his most charming smile. In a moment of eerie synchronization, Ryouga and Ryoko both groaned at the sight, the wanderer feeling a strange desire to unleash his lunch upon the stack of paper before him.

"No problem, Miss Possible. It's a place down the street called the Yang Spring; you can't miss it. Tell them that Saotome Ranma sent you."

"Why, so they'll know she's trying to mooch free food off of them?" Ryouga interjected sarcastically, relishing the dark scowl from Ranma.

Obviously misinterpreting Ryouga's utter contempt for the Saotome heir as mere friendly banter (why did so many people make that sickening mistake?), she giggled cutely at their antics. "Thanks, Mr. Saotome. Back in a sec."

And then, with a graceful turn, the recruiter flowed out the door and down the street.

Of course, with her gone, Ryouga, Ranma and Ryoko all immediately set about ignoring each other once more. For several blissful minutes, the only sounds that could be heard were the sounds of pen on paper and the occasional sipping of coffee followed by contented sighs.

Unfortunately, such moments of tranquility were doomed around these three individuals. Not long after Ryouga finished reading a clause of the contract, which, if he understood the gist of it, prohibited him from writing a screenplay, based on the events that occurred while he was in the GeoFront, he noticed the blue skinned Doctor leaning towards him.

"So, what are you in for?"

The Bandanna clad wanderer took a moment to look the so-called 'Dr. Drakken' over, before shrugging. The guy seemed harmless enough, definitely not a fighter that was for sure.

"Saving the Sheriff's life. How about you?" he replied with polite interest.

Dr. Drakken returned his shrug. "Saving the world."

_That _caught everyone's attention.

"Whoa," exclaimed Ranma, "You do that and they still treat you like this? That's pretty harsh."

The blue skinned prisoner smiled sheepishly. "Well, in their defense, I _had _spent most of my time before that trying to _conquer_ the world."

"Ahhhhh." The three curious companions sounded in surround sound.

"So, who did you save the world from?" Ryouga asked, interested despite himself.

"Forget that!" Ryoko butted in excitedly. "What was your best 'take over the world' scheme?"

Looking positively delighted at being in the spotlight for the moment, Dr. Drakken stood up and began pacing excitedly around the cell, his hands tightly clasped behind his back.

"I'm so glad you asked! I'm certain that you have all heard of my greatest exploit. Perhaps you remember . . . the _Diablo Incident_?"

Ryouga's eyes widened in shock. "That was _you?"_

The evil scientist nodded, smiling widely now. He looked ready to continue, when Ryoko interrupted again, looking positively giddy.

"A planetary scale invasion of giant robots, tactically positioned in _every _major population center via a fast food franchise selling said death machines as _kiddy toys_!" Ryoko's eyes glistened with rapturous glee. "Now _that _was _classic_! I got to tangle with a few of your bruisers myself, it was _great_!"

Ranma, on the other hand, wore a rather dark scowl. "Yeah, I remember that. I was _at _a Bueno Nacho when it all went down."

The thought of his rival being swarmed by giant robots at a fast food joint instantly had Ryouga . . . and even Ryoko, exploding with laughter. After a moment of soul warming laughter at his rival's expense, the pair of them calmed down and Ryoko gingerly wiped a tear from her eye.

"Wow, _the _Diablo man. I almost feel bad that you lost that one," offered the cyan haired Deputy, sounding disturbingly earnest.

At this point, Dr. Drakken was positively beaming from Ryoko's praise. "Why thank you, young Miss. It's always a pleasure to run into someone that can truly appreciate the hard work and dedication that goes into taking over the world."

It was right about then that, for some reason, an odd thought struck Ryouga.

"Wait a minute," he began slowly. He then pointed to Drakken. "You're smart enough to almost take over the world, and you're American, right?"

Dr. Drakken nodded, looking a little uncertain at this latest line of questioning.

"Well . . . if you're that good," Ryouga continued, "Then why are you _here_? Shouldn't you be at the American Branch of Global Dynamics?"

The blue skinned scientist raised a finger, about to respond . . . but then paused. A look of confusion spreading across his face, Drakken stared back at him uncertainly. ". . . I . . . don't know. Now that you mention it, that would have been much less troublesome."

The sound of a female nearly choking on an aborted laugh, followed very closely by the sound of a male clearing his throat uncomfortably rang out from the far side of the steel bars. Both Ryouga and Drakken turned their attention to the pair of miscreants, ironically, sitting outside the cell.

For some reason, Ryoko looked about ready to burst from trying to hold in her laughter. Ranma, on the other hand, looked to be incredibly embarrassed.

"Ummm . . ." mumbled the pigtailed researcher, scratching his cheek sheepishly.

Luckily for the hemming and hawing martial artist, he was saved by the bell – Literally, as the door to the outside world swung open, ringing the door chime once again. Through the door strode Miss Possible, wide smile on her face and a dark brown cardboard cup in each hand.

"Wow, that place is _amazing_. And that Mao guy was unbelievable. He was like some kind of Cooking Master . . . boy . . . or something."

Deflating a bit, Kim then strolled over to the cell and handed Dr. Drakken one of the cups through the bars. Immediately, the scientist took a long draw from the cup.

"_Mmmm_! That's good Cocoa Moo."

Everyone stared at the chocolate-mustache wearing villain for a moment, before Ryouga quickly shook his head and turned back to the fiery redhead.

"Excuse me, Miss Possible, but do you know why Drakken is here instead of at the American Branch?"

The attractive redhead tapped her chin several times, apparently searching for an answer herself. "You know, no one really told me why that was. Maybe there's a project going on here that they could use his expertise on?"

'Ah, well that made sense.' Ryouga nodded at the logical hypothesis . . . at least until Ryoko finally lost her running battle to contain her mirth. Within moments, the cyan haired Deputy was nearly falling out of her chair, wracked with mocking laughter.

"_Ha! _Heh . . . heh . . . oh, oh man. Sorry, Princess, but you're _way _off. There's a much simpler reason why Blue Boy is here instead of across the pond."

"Ryoko . . ." groaned Ranma in an uncharacteristically helpless manner.

She immediately waved off the researcher, still shaking with suppressed giddiness. "N-no – this is too good! You see, the American and Japanese branches aren't separate based on East and West. The American Branch is the Science; the Japanese Branch is the _Mad _Science Branch! I mean, why the heck did ya think they stuck all these Fruit Loops in a GeoFront covered with twenty some odd layers of armor plate and brought the strongest fighter on the planet to watch over them?"

"_Biggest showman_, you mean," grumbled Ranma under his breath.

Well, that was a lot of exposition to take in, but Ryouga quickly pulled all of the relevant information from Ryoko's speech that he needed and acted on it instantly. A second later, the fanged fighter spun to point at Ranma, laughing insanely the entire time.

"O-oh _man_! You're a _mad _scientist?"

"_My research is perfectly legitimate_!"

H-he couldn't take any more, Ryouga collapsed to the floor laughing so hard that even his Bakusai Tenketsu toughened sides felt like they might split.

"This is unacceptable!" Drakken's outburst was almost loud enough to bring Ryouga back down to earth. As it was, the hapless martial artist watched the older man began to rant over the helpless chuckling of his cellmate.

"I am _Dr. Drakken_!" exclaimed the scientist, as if they weren't all quite aware by that point. "One of the greatest geniuses in the _world_! I will not be relegated to the _joke _branch of the world's most vaunted Research Entity. I demand to speak to the Head of Research! Who would have the _audacity _to insult me in such a manner?"

"It's the _greatest_ scientific mind in the _universe_!"

Everyone stopped instantly, looking around warily for the disembodied voice which had just flooded the Sheriff's Office . . . well, everyone but Ryoko, at any rate. Ryouga noticed the cyan haired demoness groan loudly before dropping her face into her hands for some reason.

A moment later, before any of the trained warriors could determine the source of the voice, something _strange _happened . . . even by Nerimian standards.

Ryouga noticed it a second before it occurred (to his annoyance, he also noticed his rival noticing it a second before _he _noticed it). It began as what felt like a small ripple in the air at the center of the room, quickly followed by an electric tingle that ran up the bandanna clad warrior's spine. And then, in a most disturbing manner, a tiny black . . . _hole _tore open the very air itself . . . almost like one of those space/time disruption things he'd seen on Star Trek. The hole quickly spiraled out into a vertical black disc that hung silently in the air.

'I swear, if this is another hole to the Demon World . . .' The implications of a swirling black hole of nothingness hanging in the air were _never _good. Ryouga could only imagine what horrendous, misshapen, monstrous . . .

Twelve-year-old girl would emerge?

The Lost One quickly rubbed his eyes and checked again. . . . Yes, it was just as he'd thought. Instead of a slavering beast, a young _girl _had hopped out of the hole. The young girl had a wild mane of bright pink hair; it actually reminded him of Ryoko's for some reason, though it was by far longer and brighter than the Deputy's.

The pink haired girl quickly spun around, banishing the portal with a wave of her hand, then flashed them all a 'V' sign with her fingers.

"The stunning, brilliant, and stunningly brilliant _Washu_!"

As one, everyone in the room was set to stunned . . . except for Ryoko, who was still groaning in disgust. Maybe the Deputy was sick?

Another strange thought struck Ryouga at that very moment.

"Hey! Wait a second! How did you know what we were talking about? Were you monitoring our entire conversation via hidden cameras, just plotting the perfect time to step in?"

The self proclaimed 'Washu', held up a lecturing finger, a 'I know _everything _you don't know' look pasted on her face, when-

"No," spat, Ryoko acidly, "She just says that _every time _she comes into a room."

Ryoko then turned her glare back to the pink haired genius. "What are you doing here, _Mom_?"

Ryouga blinked at the rather abrupt, not to mention unlikely, familial revelation, but didn't really have time to react in any meaningful way.

"What? A mother can't just drop in to visit her loving daughter from time to time?" replied the youngster in an overly saccharine manner.

The Deputy immediately dug into her desk, pulling out a large sheaf of papers which she waved around like a weapon.

"Not according to my restraining order! Besides, I haven't even called anyone yet, so _why _are you _here_?"

Washu dismissed her (supposed) daughter's ire with a casual wave of her hand. "Oh, shush, Ryoko. I just wanted to ask the Sheriff for a little favor."

"Does it _look _like he's here right now?" replied Ryoko, irately waving around the room to demonstrate the notable lack of six-foot tall body builders. "That lazy slob took the day off just cuz he was _injured_."

The pint sized genius considered this for a moment, before shrugging. "Oh, well maybe _you _can-"

"Nope."

"But you haven't even heard-"

"Fraid not, _Mom_. Gotta watch the prisoner till he finishes filling out his contract. Very important work, that, can't just walk away, ya know what I mean?" As if to prove her blatantly false claim even more fraudulent, Ryoko then proceeded to kick her feet back up on her desk and leaned back as far as her chair would allow. The smug smile that was plastered across the Deputy's face was so cocky, that Ryouga was sure that if he'd _ever_ looked at his own mom like that, she would have slapped the face right off his skull.

Quite frankly, Ryouga was too lost to even breathe, let alone step into the middle of the family feud unfolding before him, but apparently the redheaded Recruiter was made from sterner stuff than he.

"Ummm . . . Miss Washu?" Kim asked hesitantly.

Immediately, Washu turned on Kim, and Ryouga was sure he saw the young woman flinch just a fraction of an inch under the tiny girl's intense gaze. And then, as quick as it appeared, the intense look on Washu's face was replaced by a playful expression that looked far more at home on the twelve-year-old girl.

"Please, call me _Lil' Washu_!"

Kim looked to Ranma, then Ryoko, then back to Washu.

"Ooookay . . . Lil' Washu. My name is Kim Possible and I've brought you a new transfer-"

"Ooooh! Let me see my new lab monkey!" The little genius cut off the redhead before skipping excitedly towards the cell that Ryouga and Drakken occupied.

Ryouga squirmed a little as her appraising gaze passed over him before sliding over to Drakken. Washu seemed to consider the both of them for several moments longer than was comfortable, until she finally settled on the blue skinned scientist on the far cot.

"Mad scientist, huh? Well, I guess you'll fit in with the restof us."

"Hey!" barked Drakken.

"Hey!" barked Ranma.

'Oooh, stereo,' Ryouga thought to himself vindictively. He did so love seeing his rival get annoyed.

"This is an outrage!" bellowed the not-so good Doctor. "I'll have you know that I am _Dr. Drakken_! I've saved the very Earth itself!"

Rather than look impressed, as Ryouga and Ranma had mere moments earlier, the pink haired genius unleashed a dramatic yawn. "Yeah, from the _Lorwardians_, heh heh heh."

For the first time since Washu's arrival, Ryoko perked up, an amused grin on her lips.

"What? Those Saiyan _wannabe's_? Sheesh, Doc, I'd stick with your conquering the world story, it isn't nearly as embarrassing."

"Hey!" Kim snapped, "My fiancé and I helped to stop the Lorwardians too!"

Of course, this only caused Ryoko to laugh derisively. "Yeah, _that _figures."

Ryouga was beginning to wonder if maybe a fight would break out yet. Maybe if he was lucky, when Kim and Ryoko started trying to kill each other, he could break out of the cell and start trying to kill Ranma too.

The redheaded recruiter's eyes narrowed as she glared at Ryoko's smirking face. "You know, you really remind me of someone I know."

"Ahh, isn't that sweet?"

"It _wasn't _a compliment."

The fanged fighter felt his own fists tense up in time with the tightening of the redhead's clenching fingers. He could feel the electric tension of violence barely restrained in the air, and he wanted in on it _badly_-

"Alright, children, that's enough of that." Ryouga nearly pouted as Washu dispelled the seductive pull of violence from the air with a few condescending words. "Well, I might as well take the two of you back to the facility with me, since I can't get my _daughter _to do anything."

Ryoko flashed a wide, insincere smile for her mother's sake.

Washu then waved her hand, using some kind of sorcery to summon what looked to be a . . . a see-through keyboard right to her fingertips. Even the brilliant Dr. Drakken's eyes went wide as he watched her begin typing away at the illusory interface, summoning another of the swirling black portals into existence.

"A _holographic interface_ . . ." He heard the blue skinned scientist to his side mumble quietly in awe. "I've never seen anything like it . . ."

A few more taps of the keyboard, and another portal appeared within the cell for Drakken to use. Standing quickly -Ryouga would almost say _eagerly_- the blue skinned villain moved forward to examine the portal, inadvertently stepping through in his excited haste. Outside the cell, Washu began to herd Kim through the other portal.

"Oh, yeah, and Ryoko, make sure you have the Sheriff call me the moment he gets in. It might be nothing, but then it might turn out to be very important."

As Ryouga had come to expect, Ryoko displayed a definite expression of 'Not Caring'. "Yeah, yeah, sure thing, _Mom_. I'll get right on i-"

Her sarcastic rebuttal was cut off rudely by the ringing of the phone on her desk.

For a long moment, Ryoko simply stared at the sleek, black communication device that sat upon her desk, as if it was the first time she had ever seen the thing. The phone rang a second time, then a third time as the Deputy continued to gaze vacantly at it. As politely as possible, Ryouga cleared his throat in a rather obvious manner.

A second later, Ryoko snapped out of her trance and looked up to see every single person in the room staring at her intently. "What?" she demanded.

The phone rung again.

"Aren't you going to answer that?" Ranma asked the question on all of their minds.

Ryoko actually managed to construct an offended expression on her lovely face. "What? You think I'd just let it ring off the hook?"

The phone rang a fifth time.

Everyone continued to stare at the Deputy, even more intently if it were at all possible.

"_Fine_! Fine, I'm answering the damn phone, see?" With an annoyed grunt, the demoness lifted the receiver from the base and held it up for her audience to behold.

Washu and Miss Possible shared a victorious smile betwixt them, before finally entering the portal and vanishing to . . . wherever it led. Ryouga certainly _hoped _it led to the facility and not to any _questionable _waypoints. Who knew if he might be forced to use those damned portals some time in the near future?

Ryoko continued to glare at the space where the portal had existed for several long seconds before finally putting the shiny black receiver up to her ear.

"You've reached the Sheriff's Office. If this _isn't _an emergency, then trust me, it _will _be an emergency."

". . ."

"Yes, this _is _Ryoko."

". . ."

"No, the Sheriff _isn't _in today."

Ryoko smiled wickedly, obviously enjoying herself more than she really should in her position as a protector of the innocent. Well, at least one of Ryouga's major questions had just been answered. He _had _been wondering just how the heck someone like Ryoko could become a law enforcement agent . . . of _any _kind. Now he knew.

The wanderer shook his head sadly. To see such a blatant case of nepotism in this day and age -

Ryouga's line of thought was quickly derailed as the wicked smirk vanished from his captor's lips.

"Wait a minute, you saw _what_?"

". . ."

"And it's _where_?"

". . ."

"And it's eating _what?_"

At that (and just when Ryouga was about to fall off the edge of his cot from anticipation), the shocked expression on Ryoko's face vanished, replaced by a look of intense boredom.

"Yep, sounds pretty bad. Well, I'll send someone over as soon as I can. Thanks for your call, we _do_ so appreciate it."

And then she carelessly dropped the receiver back onto its base and proceeded to fold her hands behind her head once more, whistling a catchy tune.

Ryouga and Ranma could only stare at the Deputy in what could be called abject horror.

"Ummm . . . that sounded . . . kinda bad," Ranma stated tentatively.

"Shouldn't you go check it out?" Ryouga added a little more fervently.

Ryoko shrugged helplessly. "Meh, what can ya do? Giant rodents are hardly the worst thing we've dealt with around here. I'm sure it'll hold till Hercule gets back. I mean, I've got _you _to watch, after all."

"_Take me with you_! For crying out loud! If it's a giant rodent, it could be the same things that Mr. Satan and me fought. Who knows what kind of damage they could cause by tomorrow?"

Ranma nodded enthusiastically. "He's right. It's a martial artist's duty to protect the weak, y'know? Besides, he's already signing the contract, so it ain't like he's gonna run off or nuthin."

The fair Deputy let out a tormented groan. "Ohhhh, do I _have _to? My coffee is gonna get cold."

"_Yes you do_!" bellowed an irate Hibiki.

Ranma quickly flipped over the Sheriff's desk and snatched up the glittering jeep keys from Ryoko's desk. "I'll drive. Let's go!"

The pigtailed researcher then instantly matched deed to word and burst out through the front door of the office.

Ryoko simply leaned back into her chair and held up three fingers, only to begin dropping them one at a time. "And three . . . two . . . one-"

Ranma burst back into the Sheriff's office, door chime ringing madly.

"Umm, where exactly are we going again?"

Ryouga shot an incredulous look in Ryoko's direction.

"And _he's _supposed to be the genius?"

OOOoooOOO

With the wild squeal of rubber on asphalt, the Deputy's jeep ground to a jarring, shuddering halt, leaving a pair of black skid marks stretching nearly thirty feet long as evidence of their passage. As soon as the vehicle came to a complete stop, and finally ceased swaying violently, a rather disparate pair evacuated in most disparate manners. Ryoko phased straight through the roof of the Jeep and flew up to a safe distance of twenty feet. Ryouga, on the other hand, swung open the passenger door and launched himself into a frantic, diving roll, taking him a good dozen yards away from the now silent machine.

A moment later, the driver side door open and a third figure casually, one might almost say 'sedately', exited the vehicle and closed the door behind him. Ranma absently glanced at the two people glaring heated death in his direction.

"What?"

"Where the heck did you learn to drive?" Ryouga bellowed furiously. The bandanna wearing male's knees still didn't feel up to supporting his weight yet after the ride he'd just taken.

Ranma scratched his head in confusion. "_Learn_?"

The Lost One was about a half a second away from leaping straight for his rival's trachea, when Ryoko floated down between them, still glowering at Ranma herself.

"Sheesh! I'm a merciless space pirate and even _I _wouldn't drive like _that_ through a populated area! I mean, you nearly flattened Dr. Venture . . . Well, okay, so that I didn't mind, but _still_."

_Okay . . ._ Ryouga mentally slugged himself for thinking he would get moral support from Ryoko. He'd have to ask her about that Space Pirate comment some time later as well. Well, it wasn't important at the moment, not nearly as important as giving Saotome piece of his mind.

He prepared to do so – except his wrath was once again interrupted.

"Deputy! Over here!"

Said Deputy, as well as Ryouga and Ranma, turned their attention to the person calling Ryoko. The person yelling was currently moving in their direction at a brisk jog, and judging by the sweat suit he was wearing, it was quite likely that that had been exactly what he'd been doing before he had called the Sheriff's Office. Likely jogging in the large, verdant park which the Wanderer had just noticed they parked just outside of.

Damn Ranma, distracting him with suicidal driving stunts so that he didn't even notice the giant park they were going to investigate!

As their informant approached, it was easy to make out that he was an older looking gentleman, with graying hair and a mustache to match. The enormous Aviator glasses were a bit retro, but hardly the worst fashion offense the man was making.

"Deputy, thank goodness you're here."

Ryoko gave a non-committal shrug. "Meh, what seems to be the problem, Dr. Stingray?"

"It's a disaster! Come, follow me, I'll show you!"

With that, the good Doctor quickly turned and began jogging back into the park. Ryouga looked to Ranma, who simply shrugged before moving at a swift, if casual walk to catch up to the jogger. Ryouga then looked to Ryoko, who mimicked Ranma's shrug before floating after the pair.

Ryouga watched the trio disappear into the park before finally shrugging himself and following. Within moments, he caught up to the moderately paced group.

"I was just passing through the park, on the way from the lab to visit my daughter," huffed the older scientist, "I had decided to get some ice cream for the two of us as I saw the ice cream truck coming my way."

"Wait, this place has an _ice cream _truck?" Ryouga asked incredulously.

His hated rival grinned evilly. "The second love of my life, buddy."

The wanderer groaned in disgust. "Have you no shame?"

"_Excuse me_. I am trying to explain the situation." Dr. Stingray glared at the pair of them, eliciting an amused giggle from Ryoko.

"As I was saying: I was just approaching the truck, when suddenly a blur collided with the side of the vehicle, striking with enough force to tear straight through the side before toppling it over completely. I managed to help the driver get out, then called you."

Ryoko scratched her head, looking not at all concerned. "And yer sure it was a giant rat?"

The doctor nodded somberly. "I got a good look at it when I helped the driver escape the vehicle."

"So, your major emergency is a mutant rat with a sweet tooth?" The cyan haired demoness turned a fiery glare back on Ryouga and Ranma. "And this couldn't have waited till tomorrow _why_?"

A growl rattled the fanged warrior's throat as he glared at the heartless pirate.

"Stop it, Ryoko."

He then turned to the doctor. "So, there's only one? If this is what I think, then there was a pack of them the last time I ran into them."

Dr. Stingray shook his head indicating the negative. "It was just the one that I saw."

Abruptly, the doctor pointed to the distant shape of the toppled ice cream truck. "There it is!"

As cautiously as possible for the trio (which was not at all), they approached the downed mobile confectionary. It was relatively easy to determine that there quarry was still present, judging by the violent shaking of the vehicle's frame and the plethora of wrappers flying from the opening in the side of the truck. The sounds of various foodstuffs being devoured at high speed filled the air.

As one, the three males turned to Ryoko to take the lead, what with her being the only authority figure present at the moment.

Ryoko was only too happy to comply.

"One extermination coming right up!" With that, she lifted her right had. Then, in a surreal manner, several dozen small spheres of brilliant orange energy began to appear in the air around her, only to zip quickly in to the palm of her head, condensing into a crackling orb of power the size of a soft ball.

"What are you-"

"Hey! Wait a sec-"

Heedless of their outbursts, Ryoko swung her arm forward and the seemingly innocuous ball of energy surged forth into a searing lance of light powerful enough to distort the air before her in several large concentric rings as the attack tore through it. Instantly, the beam detonated the entire truck into a brilliant ball of thirty-two flavors of destruction

"Ryoko!" Ryouga barked.

"Why did you do that?" asked an irate Saotome.

The Deputy merely shrugged. "What? You heard the guy. It was big enough to tackle a _truck_. Do either of _you two _have a mouse trap that big on you?"

Breathing an annoyed sigh, Dr. Stingray slowly rubbed his temples. "Deputy, with all due respect, you have _no _idea what you have just destroyed! That might have been the culmination of millions of yen and years of re . . . search . . ."

Ryouga and his cohorts stared at the man as he trailed off uncertainly. An eerie premonition struck the Hibiki male and he slowly followed the scientist's line of sight back to the smoking wreckage of the ice cream truck.

The smoke had thinned considerably, even in the small time they had been speaking. Obviously Ryoko's blast hadn't merely destroyed the truck, it had burned off all of the combustibles instantly as well. The seasoned martial artist shuddered silently at that idea. He'd only seen one person produce attacks with that kind of heat, and _that _person had possessed a tendency of shearing the peaks off of mountains.

It was almost as an afterthought that he noticed the massive bulk of the rodent rise up from the twisted remains to stand on its hind legs. The milk white mouse towered well over six feet, even hunched over as it was and its claws and fangs had grown to match. Even more disturbingly, though, were its eyes; gone were the beady red orbs he remembered, instead a pair of glistening multifaceted spheres gazed emptily at them, like the eyes of an insect . . . or a pair of priceless gems.

Ryouga gawked openly. "Ummm . . . guys. That is very much larger than the ones I saw before."

Apparently offended by the loss of its meal, the now _very_ oversized rat turned in their direction and released a resounding squeak that could have almost passed for a roar had it been about three octaves lower.

Thinking quickly, Ranma pushed Dr. Stingray behind them. "Get outta here, Doc. We'll handle this!"

As one, the three warriors dropped into their favored combat stances. Ryouga looked to his companion's, smirking vindictively at the thought of finally getting a chance to vent some of his pent up frustration. "Alright, you guys ready?"

Ryoko nodded, cackling evilly.

"Hell yeah!" cheered his rival.

Then, as one, they gathered their power.

Ryouga's aura burst to life, a massive bonfire of emerald and azure energy that swirled up and out for several yards in every direction. It took him several moments to gain control of his own wild chi and bring it back to a seething flame that burned around him.

Again, dozens of spheres of orange energy formed around Ryoko, only to fly unerringly to her palm. This time, she squeezed the sphere of power that formed, and it instantly altered to her whim, forming a blazing sword of pure energy. Arcs of yellow and blue lighting flashed up the sword's length, and indeed, across her entire body as she focused all of her power into the lethal blade.

Ranma was engulfed in a golden aura of power, except his didn't surge wildly as Ryouga's had. Instead, the golden chi of his rival's confidence only flooded out for several feet before the pigtailed researcher pulled back in an amazing display of control, forming it into a literal second skin of condensed life energy. The wanderer's eyes actually widened at the show of skill and focus.

As one, the trio of warriors, excessive overkill in Ryouga's mind, tensed to leap forward, their gathered power twisting the winds around them and flattening the grass in all directions, when-

Without warning, Ranma suddenly stood back up, his aura vanishing in a flash of golden sparks. The pigtailed researcher immediately reached up, running a hand through his hair in a sheepish manner.

"Ah, yeah – 'Bout that . . . you two are on your own."

"_What_?"

"Heh, sorry bout that. Guess I got caught up in the moment. Y'see, researchers ain't allowed to interfere in these kinds of situations, so I gotta sit on the sidelines this time."

Ryouga wasn't sure what was going to burst first, his temper, or that tiny vein in his brain; at this point, he was sure he was about to go apoplectic in _both _meanings of the term.

Seconds away from the eruption of Mt. St. Ryouga, a hand on his shoulder distracted him from the object of his abject rage. He looked over to see Ryoko smiling seductively.

"C'mon, stud. Like we need Lady Fingers back there to deal with a freaking _rat_."

"Hey!"

Ryouga cracked his knuckles, nodding eagerly. He was more than prepared to transfer his Ranma induced rage to a more appropriate (though infinitely less satisfying) target. As an afterthought, he glanced at the glowing energy sword held loosely in her other hand.

"Say, you wouldn't happen to know a guy named Kuwabara, would you?"

Surprisingly, the Deputy's eyes widened for a second at the mention of the name. It was quickly followed by a strange little smile settling on her lips.

"Do I _ever_. We met a while ago at an Advanced Energy Sword seminar." The space pirate made a disturbingly sensual purring sound that nearly sent Ranma running in the other direction. "That guy _really _knew how to handle a blade."

Ryouga instantly clamped his fingers to his nose as it threatened to explode messily all over him. Ranma, on the other hand, leaned forward in shock.

"B-b-but, what about Tenchi?"

Ryoko shrugged innocently. "Hey, what happens in Shinjuku stays in Shinjuku . . . and I have to say, that Kuwabara guy _really _had a thing for girls with blue hair."

The fanged boy and the pigtailed boy stared at each other, aghast, for a moment . . . before as one, they let out a pair of resigned sighs. Slowly, they both nodded their heads, understanding Kuwabara's infatuation all to well themselves.

It was about this time that Dr. Stingray decided to remind them all that he was still present for some moronic reason.

"Ahh, I know it's not really my place to tell you how to do your jobs – _but it's charging towards us_!"

Ryouga, Ryoko and Ranma all rolled their eyes.

"Sheesh, excitable much?" Ryoko muttered sarcastically.

Ranma just slowly shook his head before dropping a companionable arm around the doctor's shoulder and ushering him away. "So, anyway, Doc, when ya gonna let me test out that new hard sui-"

With casual ease, Ryouga summoned his aura once more and spun to meet the charging rodent head on. The oversized lab rat had only covered a meager twenty feet while they had been distracted, leaving a good fifty feet for him to cover himself. He crouched down and prepared to launch himself forward-

Ryoko zipped ahead of him, not hindered by the same damnable laws of physics that shackled him. Sword trailing behind her, leaving a narrow furrow of scorched earth in her wake, the cyan haired demoness flew forward, heading straight on a collision course with their unorthodox foe. At the last second, the Deputy barrel rolled to the side, swinging her sword up with a ridiculous amount of force, considering it was a construct of pure light, aiming to take the rodent's head off clean at the shoulders.

Ryouga winced slightly, expecting to see a severed head come flying in his direction at high speed . . . except, just as Ryoko's blade reached the fur of the rodent's neck, mere millimeters from searing flesh, the entire weapon shattered like glass and flowed into the creature's body.

He could only watch, slack jawed and wide eyed as orange energy crackled across the monster mouse's body like bottled lightning. He nearly rubbed his eyes as well, as he could _swear_ that he saw the creature's entire body swell slightly, growing even more monstrous.

Completely unprepared for the utter failure of her attack, Ryoko hesitated at a rather inopportune time. The eight foot long rat creature didn't even slow down in its charge, and the unfortunate Deputy ricocheted off its muscled flank with all of the effect of a fly on a windshield as it blew past her. Ryouga winced again as his erstwhile companion crashed to the ground several yards away from where Ranma and the good doctor were watching.

Fists tightened into lethal weapons as the fanged warrior set himself to receive the charge. If the rat noticed his stance, it didn't show it as it continued its heedless stampede of one.

It sure as hell noticed when he swung out with a haymaker to end all haymakers, though. His blow landed home with enough force to kill his opponent's charge dead and crack its narrow head sharply to the side. What looked like a tooth went tumbling through the air as well-

The massive rat's head swung back in his direction barely a second later, scarcely looking any worse for wear. It then reared back and unleashed another howling squeak right into his face, showering him liberally with mouse drool.

The blooming smirk on Ryouga's face died quite quickly.

"Ah hell."

OOOoooOOO

Ranma winced mightily as an obscenely loud _crunch _echoed through the park. It was soon followed by the harried sounds of frantic manversus rodent combat the likes of which he hadn't heard since last year's Christmas party.

Off to his side, he noticed Ryoko floating to join him and the doctor, absently brushing some dust from her flattering uniform.

"Rude little jerk, not dying like that," muttered the Deputy crossly.

The both of them winced again as another particularly loud _crunch _filled the air. It was quickly followed by a white blur flying through the air to their side, a yellow and green blur following hot on its heels.

"Man, it just figures that Hercule would take today off," Ryoko continued her rant, "It's like the guy has some kind of sixth sense for avoiding danger."

Ranma shrugged. "World's strongest fighter or not-" Another bone crushing impact rang out, this one heralding the passage of Ryouga's rag dolling form flying back they way it had come. "-I'm sure the two of you can handle this. Me and Ryouga are kinda old hands at this kinda thing, after all."

Lifting her arm to look at the exotic gem embedded in her wrist, Ryoko grumbled darkly under her breath. "If mom'd just let me use more than one gem, this fight would already be ov- Umm, your buddy is glowing again."

"Huh?" Ranma quickly spun to see what she meant. Just as quickly, he slapped a hand to his forehead. _Idiot! Doesn't that moron pay attention to anything?_ he thought incredulously.

Frantically, he shouted for all he was worth.

"_Ryouga, don't_!"

"_Shi Shi Houkodan__!_"

_Ah hell_.

OOOoooOOO

Ryouga twisted his body frantically in mid-flight, miraculously bringing his feet back under him just as he finally hit the ground. Grass and soil split around his slippers digging two deep furrows nearly six feet long before he finally slid to a shaky stop. Gingerly, he lowered his crossed forearms and shook out the stiff limbs.

_I actually felt that_, he mused to himself, _This could get serious_.

That in mind, he lowered himself into an intimately familiar stance, feet spread apart and knees bent to brace himself. He then proceeded to cross his arms before him, pulling them tightly to his chest.

"Fine," he muttered darkly, already thinking unpleasant thoughts, "Try _this _one on for size."

He could feel his depression fueled chi spiral in around him, circling ever deeper into the darkness of his heart, gathering power from every painful memory he could dredge up . . .

Ryouga Hibiki had no shortage of those-

"_Ryouga, don't_!"

_Wha-_

"_Shi Shi Houkodan_!"

Even before he had abandoned Nerima, Ryouga had always clutched an abundant number of tragic events close to his heart for use in forging his most powerful weapon, the Shi Shi Houkodan, into an ever more devastating attack. The past three years hadn't exactly been a picnic either. Three years of constant battle, fighting horrendous monsters that still haunted his darkest nightmares. Three years of loneliness, rejected by Akane and abandoned by his closest friend/most hated rival. A year and a half of living with the cold fact that he, personally, had ruined any chance of happiness that he might have once had with Akari . . .

Needless to say, Ryouga's Shi Shi Houkodan was just a _wee _bit stronger than the last time he'd used it before his pigtailed rival.

_This_ Lion Roared _loud._

The sphere of chi in his hands exploded out into a horizontal column of emerald flame nearly six feet in diameter, shredding the carefully landscaped park vindictively as it tore hungrily through the air towards its prey. The lance of devastation slammed into the giant mouse and washed over it, continuing on to destroy even more of the verdant scenery behind the target for a good twenty yards. Ryouga couldn't even hear the dying squeal of his victim over the blood pumping in his ears and the unearthly howling of his own hellish attack-

Which cut short quite abruptly as he was smacked sharply upside the head.

Entire arms still smoking, Ryouga turned fiercely and scowled at his pigtailed tormentor.

"_What_?"

Ranma stared back, a disgusted look on his face.

"You moron! That thing survived an exploding truck and sucked up Ryoko's energy sword like it was Kasumi's sukiyaki! Why would you throw a _chi blast _at it?"

With an irritated swat, Ryouga brushed his rival's hand away and shrugged indifferently. "So? What's the worst that could happen?"

With a little more force than was strictly necessary, Ranma grabbed the Lost One's head and twisted it painfully to the side so they were both staring at the dissipating cloud of smoke and dust that his attack had created . . .

Or, more specifically, at the massive, ten foot tall rodent that now towered over them. Somehow, the creature had mutated even further, its claws now looking more like scythes, its teeth like daggers and its fur like a mat of iron needles. More disturbingly, though, several jagged outcroppings of what looked like _crystal _had erupted from its back, the unnatural constructs were literally shimmering with a painfully familiar emerald energy.

Ranma turned to glare at him, their noses less than an inch apart. "Do I even have to say 'I told you so'?"

Annoyed with his rival actually being correct, but refusing (on pain of death) to give him the satisfaction of _admitting_ it, Ryouga shoved the pigtailed researcher back several steps.

"If you can't do something _useful_, then get the hell out of the way, Saotome!" he barked more than a little bitterly. He then turned to the shapely Deputy behind them. "Come on, Ryoko. Looks like we have to do this the old fashioned way."

The cyan haired demoness cracked her knuckles, a malevolent smile spreading across her lips. "Suits me just fine."

This time, the two of them flowed forwards as one. The martial artist ran forward, feet barely touching the grass in his haste, the pirate skimmed forward, matching his pace perfectly. Several yards before they reached their target, Ryouga smirked as Ryoko sank into the ground still moving full speed, and vanished from sight.

Taking the hint, he launched himself into the air and into a powerful flying kick. What the giant overtly mutant rat had gained in sheer bulk and creepiness, it had lost in speed. His attack landed home, dead center of the creature's exposed underbelly with all of the force and momentum he could muster. Even as the rodent began to fold around his foot, he quickly pushed off with all of his strength, sending himself soaring back through the air-

Just in time for Ryoko to erupt from the earth and deliver the Mother of all Uppercuts to the mutant's narrow jaw.

The power of the Deputy's super powered sucker punch lifted the mammoth mouse over five feet into the air. The creature was nearly flipped over in mid air, but didn't quite make it; instead it landed solidly on its head, the rest of its body slamming back to the earth with a calamitous crash a second later.

Of course, Ryouga didn't believe that would finish it for a second. He instantly leapt into the air, easily clearing thirty feet, his trajectory placing him directly in line to land on the rodent's hairy chest. Even as gravity began to reassert its insistent pull on him, he quickly pulled his legs up behind him, turning his jump into a thirty-foot diving knee drop. With a bone-shattering _crunch, _his double knee drop slammed into the rat's chest with enough force to crater the ground beneath it for several yards in each direction.

Not to be outdone, though, Ryoko flew towards the creature's wheezing form and grabbed its disgusting, hairless tail in both deceptively delicate hands. With a mighty heave, she _swung_ the entire beast _up and over_ her head, slamming it back to the ground on her other side and creating an even larger crater

Ryouga quickly hopped to his feet after having the rug so unexpectedly pulled out from under him, and dusted himself off a bit. He had a hard time being annoyed, though, as Ryoko turned to face him, a wild smirk on her face.

"Not bad for an Earther. You sur-"

The Deputy's words crested sharply into a howl of agony as the long tail held loosely in her hand suddenly flashed to life, arcing with a familiar orange lightning. The surge of power wracked Ryoko's, her back arching painfully and her limbs locked straight under the assault. She couldn't even release the tail, as her hand clenched around it involuntarily, at least until the electrically charged rodent contemptuously flicked its tail, sending her flying twenty feet to careen into the ground once more.

"Ryoko!" Ryouga yelled frantically.

He didn't have the time to check on his downed friend, as the crackling tail twirled back to lash out at him. Diving frantically to the side, he dodged the first strike by a narrow margin, an explosion of soil and smoke bursting up from where the tail struck the earth. He followed his dive with another roll, then a desperate leap to the side, finally putting some distance between him and the downed rat.

It quickly took advantage, rolling over onto its belly before scrabbling back up onto its hind legs. Not wanting to give it too much time to recover, Ryouga dove right back in. He lashed out with a right cross to its jaw, snapping its head to the side, followed up by a spinning backhand and finally twisting around into a spinning back kick, sending the beast skidding several feet backwards.

To his shock, his adversary recovered instantly, not even looking fazed in the slightest. In fact, it was _his _hands that were bloody now, covered in tiny scratches from its steel-like fur. Again, he wasn't granted the time to appreciate just how badly things were going, as the rat creature opened its jaws and unleashed another resounding howl-

Ryouga's pupils shrunk to pinpricks when a blinding emerald light built up at the back of the rodent's throat. He was so taken aback, and it all happened so fast, that when the painfully familiar blast of raw chi exploded from the creature's mouth, he didn't even have a prayer of dodging. The Rodent Roar Bullet hit him full force in the chest, sending his world into a madly spinning collage of color and agony.

He slammed into the ground, shoulder first, an unknown distance away, before rolling bouncing and finally skidding to a stop for several more painful yards. Even worse than the pain, and the humiliation of getting hit by essentially his own attack, was the fact that when he finally came to a grinding stop, he realized that Ranma was standing above him, smirking down at him.

"Not. A. Word." Demanded the still smoking Hibiki.

The fanged fighter flipped back to his feet, only to rush back into the fight, before his smart ass rival could make a smart ass comment regardless. As he did, Ryoko came flying in from the side, looking almost as singed as he likely did, and with a fierce scowl on her face. Thinking quickly, a smirk exposed one of his fangs and he held out a hand to her.

"How about a boost?" he asked cheerfully.

The demoness returned his smirk. She quickly clasped his hand in her own, clamping down with all the force of a vice. Instantly, Ryoko ground to an aerial halt, only to spin to the side, swinging him around her in several rapid revolutions before releasing him at their adversary at breakneck speeds.

Playing his part as human ballistic weapon perfectly, Ryouga careened into the rodent's gut, slipper clad feet leading the way. Their combined attack blasted into the rat with enough power to send it sliding back several yards, deep furrows tearing into the ground beneath its clawed feet. Even as the fanged projectile fell to the ground, Ryoko flew past him to lay into the rodent with a fierce, rapid series of punches, pushing the mutant further and further back, its feet digging deeper into the soil as it struggled vainly against the onslaught.

Nearly ten seconds and over a dozen super human strength strikes into her combo, though, Ryoko slowed her frenzied attack, coming to a gasping stop, one fist resting weakly against the mutant rat's hairy chest. The Deputy slowly looked up, taking in another lungful of air as she did, to stare at the face of the slavering monster glaring back down at her. Its jaws parted slowly to reveal rows of razor edged fangs and a deep, bass hiss rumbled from deep in its throat.

". . . Crap."

Ryoko quickly floated back and into the ground again, just as the rat's scythe-like claws tore through the air where her head had been only a fraction of a second ago. Several moments later, the cyan haired demoness floated up out of the ground beside Ryouga once more.

"Y'know what? The old fashioned way stinks."

Unfortunately, he had to agree. "I hate to say it, but you're right."

That thought in mind, and with a deep sigh of regret, Ryouga began to remove his belt.

"Hey now, Big Boy." A saucy smile suddenly appeared on Ryoko's face for some reason. "I'm all about going out with a bang, but this is hardly the time."

It took roughly three point four seconds for Ryouga to realize exactly what it was that she was insinuating, but only one point five for his face to blush beet red.

"_It's not like that_!"

To prove his point, he quickly snapped his belt out, a quick surge of chi forming the soft fabric into a lethal blade of cloth.

"If you have any more lethal attacks, now would be a good time to use them."

Ryoko rubbed her chin for a moment in consideration. "I could always summon a demon."

"How could that _possibly _help?"

"Well, considering it would almost instantly go out of control, probably not at all."

He glared at her smiling face, though to no real effect.

"Anything _else_?" he grumbled between clenched teeth.

If anything, his reactions only amused the space pirate further. Ryoko chuckled teasingly, only to run a hand through her long, cyan locks.

"Oh, I have a few tricks up my sleeve, still."

To prove her point, she pulled her hand out of her hair, only to reveal several six inch needles held loosely between her fingers. Ryouga boggled for a moment at the sudden appearance of the weapons, or at least how much she must spend on brushes. Hmm, maybe she knew Mousse too?

He quickly brushed the distracting line of thought from his mind.

Reasserting himself back into the seriousness of the moment, Ryouga nodded grimly to his erstwhile partner. As one the pair turned to face the deadly monster. Before they could even take a step to rejoin the battle, though, a hand on either of their shoulders brought them up short. The both of them turned to see Ranma standing between them.

"Whoa, hold up there, kids. You can't just go choppin that thing up, there."

Ryouga knocked his rival's hand away scornfully. "Stop interfering, Ranma. After these past three years I have a lot more experience dealing with monsters than you."

"Yeah," chimed in Ryoko, "Do you know how rarely I meet someone that _isn't _a pansy 'let's spare _this _monster, too' type of guy?"

Ranma rolled his eyes in annoyance. "Don't be stupid, you two. Just cuz somethin's monstrous, don't mean it's a monster. Didn't ya hear Dr. Stingray? This thing is probably someone's escaped experiment, so you need to take it alive."

The fanged warrior's eyes narrowed as he glared at his rival. "And I suppose you have some _brilliant _idea to accomplish this apparently simple task?"

To Ryouga's chagrin, Ranma was wearing that familiar smirk of his that just screamed 'I have an idea!'. Instantly, an overbearing sense of imminent disaster washed over the Hibiki with the force of a tsunami. Not that Ryouga didn't have faith in his rival's intelligence... well, actually, that was exactly it. The Saotome heir's track record with 'clever schemes' was hardly a thing of legend.

"As a matter of fact, I do."

Ryouga groaned loudly, his sense of imminent disaster shifting to a more personal sense of imminent bodily harm. His nerves were not at all soothed when Ranma turned and began to shoo off Ryoko.

"Yo, Deputy, you go keep that thing busy for a bit. I gotta teach Ryouga an Ultimate Technique in about three minutes."

_Ultimate technique_ . . ._?_ Ryouga mused to himself.

"Hey! Why don't I get to learn it?" Ryoko asked heatedly.

Ranma rolled his eyes, as if what he was about to say was the most obvious thing in the world. "Um, are you a ridiculously skilled martial arts master whom has fully actualized his psionic potential?"

Ryoko raised a finger into the air . . . only to lower it a moment later.

" . . . no," replied the demon, pouting in an adorably sad manner. The crestfallen deputy then sadly flew back to battle the beastly rodent by her lonesome.

To Ryouga's dread, Ranma then turned back his way, overly confident smile on his face.

"Alright, Ryouga. We don't got much time, so watch what I do and copy it exactly. For this technique, you gotta channel your psionic energy _perfectly, _or ya might end up messin yerself up pretty good."

Ryouga nodded seriously. "I'll try my best, but I'm certain that I won't be able to do it."

That brought his would be mentor up short. "What? Ya haven't even seen what I'm gonna do yet!"

Ryouga smirked vindictively. "Well, you see, I'm a _real _martial artist, so I use my _chi_. I don't think I can do this Psionics stuff that you're talking about."

He was rewarded with a slap upside the head, but it was totally worth it for the look on his rival's face. "_Same difference_! Now shut up, we don't got time for this."

Ryouga glowered. "What? You worried about that _monster _back there."

His rival shook his head. "Naw, Ryoko will be fine. I'm more worried about the rat creature."

Ryouga could only stare at his rival, at a complete loss for words.

"Okay, now seriously, shut up and watch."

Still not sure how to respond, Ryouga nodded quickly. As soon as he noticed the first changes in his rival's aura, though, the wanderer began to watch with voracious curiosity.

At first, his rival appeared to be building his chi up around him normally, if somewhat slowly. Ryouga noted absently that Ranma's chi had increased markedly since last he had seen the pigtailed fighter, though it still fell well short of a number individuals he had come to meet over the past three years-

Then it happened. Ryouga wasn't even sure what it was, but something seemed to _snap _. . . or burst, or something within his rival's body, and suddenly a surge of power flowed through Ranma's body that sent Ryouga stumbling back several steps in shock. His rival's aura burned like a golden flame around his body, flattening the grass around him, even as small particles of debris and sod began to float upwards in defiance of gravity.

"Whoa!" Ryouga stumbled back another step. "What the heck was _that_?"

Again, Ranma smirked. "Awesome, huh? Just released a . . . mental block, I guess ya can call it. That's just the first step, though. Next, ya gotta channel it down to your legs, cuz yer gonna need it to pull off what I got in mind."

All of Ryouga's worries about danger and humiliation were cast to the wind as he watched his rival with avid fascination. Certainly, he'd been aware that his rival had been in intense training these three past years, but to see Saotome do something so – so unbelievable, well, Ranma had his undivided attention now.

In a masterful display of skill, Ranma did just as he described, channeling the bulk of his enhanced power down into his legs, modulating it with almost surgical precision. Ryouga could almost see what Ranma was planning on doing with the power, the Anything Goes master was displaying his chi so clearly, and moving it about with such clear intent.

"There, now you've seen me do it. Now, let me explain exactly _how _you do it, and what you're gonna do with it."

Ryouga nodded, paying rapt attention.

OOOoooOOO

Ryoko sighed in abject boredom as she casually slid out of the mutant's reach once again. Since she wasn't allowed to kill it, now, all the fun of fighting it had evaporated with the morning dew. And since all she had to do was keep it busy, floating circles around the thing was depressingly easy.

Honestly, it was times like this that she regretted getting Ryo-Ohki that job salvaging the Super Dimensional Fortress that had nearly crashed into the earth a few years back. At least then they could have made a game out of it-

"Ryoko." Her reverie was interrupted by her erstwhile prisoner's voice.

She quickly zipped back away from the mutant mouse before she turned to regard her partner. Her eyebrow rose in mild interest at the violent, twisting aura of emerald energy that surrounded the Alpha-male. She had taken a reading of his power level earlier, and it had been pretty meager considering some of the things on said scale, but somehow, in the span of minutes, it had risen several fold. Now, the human male could _almost _be considered noteworthy . . . at least in this quadrant of the galaxy.

"You might want to step out of the way," he suggested in a very no-nonsense tone.

She shrugged easily and complied. Like she cared.

As soon as she was clear from his path, Ryouga took another step forward-

Then he _vanished_.

_No, wait!_ He hadn't vanished, the boy had somehow increased his speed several fold as well, literally blurring across the space between him and the mutant in the blink of an eye. Her eyes actually widened at the unexpected display of speed. Weak or not, with that kind of speed, he could prove pretty entertaining-

The Space Pirate boggled again, as, instead of laying into the mutant with high speed attacks, the fanged fighter suddenly tore off to the side at the last second, seemingly entering into orbit around their adversary. Dirt and grass flew wildly in perfect circle as Ryouga continued to circle it at speeds that rendered him almost invisible.

"Wha . . ." she drawled in confusion.

"Heh, just a technique I've been developing for GD. Still working on a _good _name, though."

Ryoko was about to ask just what the heck that was supposed to mean, when Ranma suddenly put a finger to his lips. "Shh, watch and learn."

Her hackles rose for a second, but morbid curiosity as to the ongoing fight narrowly beat out her annoyance with the pigtailed researcher.

Before them, Ryouga continued his rapid revolution. If the two seasoned warriors were having trouble keeping track of him, then the rat thing was utterly doomed to confusion. It couldn't even gather its senses long enough to swipe blindly at the martial artist, let alone prepare itself for what was about to come-

In a flash of linear motion that would have caused a lethal case of whiplash in a normal human, Ryouga suddenly vanished from his circular course, almost appearing to teleport directly in front of the rodent. Before his form even stopped blurring, Ryouga's leg was already up in the air, lashing out in a massive upward kick that cracked the air with its sheer velocity. The mutant rat was helplessly blasted into the air by the attack, soaring against the shackles of gravity, almost seeming to float upwards into the air: ten feet, twenty feet-

Even as it continued to float upwards, Ryouga launched himself into the air after it. For some reason, Ryoko barely managed to catch the sight of a number of bandannas trailing from both of his wrists.

"Hey . . . wait a second . . ." she muttered quietly.

In another flash of motion, Ryouga reappeared behind the rodent in midair. The martial artist swung both his arms forward and his bandannas shot forward, wrapping around the mutant and pulling it into a tight bear hug. Apparently the fanged fighter was a fan of wrestling as well, as he used his mildly impressive strength to flip the ten foot bulk of the rodent backwards, preparing for a twenty foot Suplex. Just before gravity could reassert itself, impatient as she was, Ryouga inexplicably chose that moment to fire a small energy blast from his hand. The tiny sphere of emerald energy flew off into the distance, doing nothing more than starting the tightly bound duo rotating madly just as they began their descent.

Ryoko covered her eyes quickly to avoid the explosion of debris as the Ryouga and the rodent collided with the earth in a very convincing cosplay of an asteroid.

She then turned to Ranma, a look of pure disbelief on her face. "You are _unbelievable_."

Her companion shrugged, smiling like a small child. "What? Worked, didn't it?"

She could only stare at him as they waited for the cloud of debris to be carried away by the breeze. When it finally did, it revealed a massive crater, a giant rodent half buried in the earth at its heart. One of its oversized legs spasms sporadically. Just staggering his way out of the crater, looking more than a little dizzy, Ryouga endeavored to join them.

"Wow, Saotome. That move was something else. What did you call it again? It seems . . . a bit familiar. Is it a revision on another of your moves?"

Ranma shrugged absently, pulling out a small notepad from his pants pocket. He quickly flipped the booklet open, revealing a small pen stuck between the pages, which the pigtailed fighter pulled out to begin writing something.

"Just something I've been cobbling together . . . Say, how are you feelin' right now, buddy? Any weakness, or crippling pain?"

The hapless Hibiki looked at the researcher strangely for a moment. "Um . . . no, why would – Wait a second! Why would I be feeling _crippling pain_?"

Ranma quickly jotted something down in his notebook.

"Hmph, well, in the manga, even the Secondary Lotus is supposed to push the body beyond its limits . . ."

"What? The Secondary Lotus? You taught me a move from a _comic book_? _You son of a_-" Unfortunately, the rest of what promised to be an extremely entertaining series of death threats and insults suddenly dissolved into a series of agonized gurgling as the Lost Boy's body abruptly chose that moment to collapse to the ground.

"Ahhhh, there we go." Ranma quickly made several more illegible scribbles into his notebook. "Must have forgotten to take the Bakusai Tenketsu training into account. Hey, Ryo, can you quantify the kind of pain you're in?"

". . . –gurgle- . . . –gasp- . . . _bastard_ . . ."

"_Fascinating_." More frantic writing.

Ryoko rolled her eyes in disgust. As much as a connoisseur of human suffering as she was, this was just getting ridiculous. Deciding to broach the subject with tact and subtlety, she swiftly smacked the pigtailed researcher upside the head.

"_Excuse me_, Count Rugen, but you might want to pay attention to the _monster_."

"Wha?" Ranma exclaimed. The two of them spun just in time to see the tail of the creature vanish into the gaping tunnel it had just dug.

"_Damn it_!" The researcher quickly threw the wanderer over his shoulder and the two (three, technically) of them rushed over to the hole. By the time they reached it, the tunnel already extended down into the earth beyond the range of their sight.

Ryoko whistled appreciatively. "Daaamn. That thing can dig."

Ranma nodded mutely. A second later, though, he quickly held Ryouga out to arms length and shook him a little. "Alright, Mole Man, time to shine!"

He then released the bandanna clad martial artist . . . who promptly collapsed to the ground in a boneless heap. Some minor groaning and inaudible swear words were the only signs that their companion was still alive.

Ryoko smacked Ranma upside the head again. "Idiot! Now he's too hurt to go after it! Who am I supposed to dump this job on now?"

The red shirted researcher waved off her (lack of) concern. "Don't worry. I'll just drag him down there with us and _we_ can follow it."

"Down _there_?" she replied incredulously. "And what exactly do we do if we _did _catch up to it?"

Ranma rolled his eyes. "Sheesh, and _you _were the scourge of the galaxy?"

"_Hey_! I only have _one _of my gems! If I was at full power, this whole _planet _would be a smoking ruin . . . well, except for Tenchi."

"Yeah, he'd just _love _that, wouldn't he?"

"_Shut u_-"

Their argument was cut tragically short when the ground beneath their feet began to quake violently. Ryouga's comatose form flopped about like a fish out of water, and even the nimble Ranma was forced to work to maintain his balance. She, on the other hand, simply floated about a foot into the air.

Then, of course, the both of them could only watch helplessly as the tunnel collapsed in on itself before their eyes, dooming their already moot debate on following the rat to irrelevance.

The Deputy and the Researcher stared at each other for a long moment.

"What the hell was that?" Ryoko asked rhetorically.

"Two in one day? And this one felt even stronger . . ." mused Ranma.

They shared another long look.

"Someone screwed up?" she asked, already knowing the answer.

"Oh yeah." Ranma answered regardless.

"Alright, you go to GD and find out what's going on. I'll take Sleeping Beauty back to the Sheriff's Office. I have a feeling I'm about to have a lot of visitors soon."

Ranma nodded, in complete agreement with her for probably the first time that she could recall. "Sounds like a plan."

And then he was smiling again. It wasn't a pleasant smile.

"I'll take the jeep."


	3. The PLot Thickens

Eureka - The Plot Thickens . . . wait, there's a _Plot_?

Chapter Three

Allow me a maudlin moment, please. I know it's an odd thought to have, especially for someone that hasn't been writing that long, but do you know one thing about the Ranma fanfiction community as a whole?

The sense of community. Now, I've been reading fanfiction for _years _before I actually got into writing myself, but one thing I always remembered was how interconnected it felt. How all of the huge authors that got me hooked so thoroughly back in the day seemed to know each other, and fans always knew what the big stories were because people went out of their way to pass on the knowledge.

I dunno, maybe it's ff net, here. Maybe it's too easy to find stories now, rather than searching and hacking your way through the cyber jungle to find those rare treasures. I remember, keenly, stories I read years ago, while most of the time on here I can scarcely recall a story i read last week.

Don't get me wrong, I feel like I have a little niche here, with other great writers like Cap'n Chryssalid, Claymade and Rowan Seven, but . . . I dunno. I guess I can't even explain it to myself really. Anyway, back to business

Enjoy if you will, Tolerate if you won't

OOOoooOOO

Gendo folded his hands together before carefully positioning them to cover his mouth. He followed it with an attempt to tilt his head _just_ enough to cause the light to glint off of his glasses. It was sort of a look he'd been cultivating for some time and he thought it was finally starting to pay off. Sure, technically speaking, he couldn't _see _anything when the light was shining off his glasses like that, but he was pretty sure it made him look really inscrutable to his employees.

Speaking of which.

"Excellent work, Dr. Saotome. You did the right thing, both by refraining from entering the battle, and by bringing this latest development to my attention."

The pigtailed researcher nodded nonchalantly. "Yeah, it was a pain stayin' out of the fight, but it did give me a good chance to see how Ryouga's been doing lately."

That quirked Gendo's curiosity. As much as Saotome's apparently endless ego infuriated him to no end, the young scientist _was _an unparalleled expert in the field of combat. "Tell me, what would your assessment of Mr. Hibiki's current capabilities be, if you don't mind me asking?"

Obviously, the young man didn't, as a wide smile split his face. "I gotta say, he's done a pretty good job of playin' keep up with me. From what he was sayin', almost the entire time I've been here, training, he's been wanderin' the world, fighting. I'm almost tempted to do a write up on the Nature verses Nurture approaches to martial arts. Heh, he could turn out to be a really good guinea pig-"

"Did someone say _Guinea Pig_?"

Instantly, both men let out loud groans.

Just as every other time he recalled, the disembodied voice heralded the arrival of Professor Washu via her patented dimensional portal. The young (appearing) scientist flashed a winning smile at the two men present, only to receive a dark glare from Ranma in return.

"He's _my _guinea pig! I knew him longer!"

Washu simply gave Saotome a _look_. In a flash of red and black, Gendo was startled to have Ranma suddenly clinging to the back of his high seated chair. Still, image was important; doing his best to hide his mild surprise, Gendo addressed the pigtailed researcher without turning.

"Dr. Saotome, thank you for your report. You are dismissed."

In a most rare display of courtesy, the young man didn't even argue his dismissal. Rather, he just flipped over the desk and out the door in a movement so fluid that Gendo was tempted to call for the Janitor. Washu, on the other hand, giggled evily at the fear she instilled, even in dauntless warriors such as Saotome.

Now that it was down to just him and Washu, it was time to take control of the situation again. "I take it that you are here in relation to the tremors as well?"

Washu scoffed loudly. "What? _No_. Don't be ridiculous."

_Well, so much for that idea,_ groused the young agent.

Washu proceeded to pull out a document from . . . somewhere. "I just need you to sign this so I can make a surface contact."

Gendo simply stared at the young Professor for a long moment . . . however, despite his position, his pride and his professionalism, even _he _knew better than to get on Washu's bad side. With a weary, defeated sigh, he held out his hand to accept the document from the childlike researcher. "Very well. However, while you are here, I would like to request that you look into this latest seismic activity."

Only to have her roll her eyes at him. "Oh, please. You build a secret underground facility inside a clearly unnatural geological anomaly and you didn't consider that seismic instability might be a possibility?"

"I assure you, such concerns _were _taken into account, however these latest tremors are not occurring within our existing geological predictions. Now, I need to begin an investigation into the confirmed sightings of what is likely an escaped experiment. So, would you _please _be so kind as to look into this seismic activity for me?"

This time the young woman actually dismissed his concerns with an errant wave of her hand. The _audacity_. "Hey, I got my own problems to deal with. Now that I have this form, I need to figure out how the heck I'm supposed to go about contacting a-" Washu shuddered dramatically. "-a _magical_ girl about another magical girl."

Without another word, the insufferable woman than conjured up her holographic keyboard, summoning her familiar portal once more.

"_Miss Hakubi_!" he insisted intently.

"Oh, stuff it, Ikari. You want the _greatest _genius in the _universe _to sully herself with something as lame as that? Just pass if off to one of the geologists."

"Washu, you know very well that-"

Which was about the exact moment that Washu stepped through her portal and vanished.

". . . there are no geologists here . . . Damn it, I hate it when she does that."

With a slight huff of annoyance, the Government liaison idly shuffled about a few pieces of paper sitting on his desk.

_Well, the seismic activity isn't a crisis . . . yet, so that, at least, could sit for a time. _Somewhat more pressing was the matter of the escaped experiment. Unfortunately, that meant he had to go from dealing with an insufferable scientist to an insufferable Sheriff. With a sigh, he depressed a clearly labeled button on his desk.

"Nuku Nuku, could you please get me Hercule?"

"Mya! Right away, Mr. Ikari!" replied his desk intercom in an overly cheery voice.

Feeling the sides of his head beginning to throb, Gendo gently began to rub his aching temples. Why, oh why, did they have to provide jobs for all of their scientists' mentally unstable creations?

OOOoooOOO

With a grand flourish, Ryouga applied the final signature to yet another piece of contract. Then, with an even more extravagant flourish, he flipped the sheet of paper over to the 'Completed' pile.

"Aha! Take that, my contractual nemesis!"

Outside his cell, perched comfortably behind her desk, Ryoko rolled her eyes.

"Woohoo, you finally finished section one. I think that means you're legally allowed to open your eyes down here now."

Ryouga let out an agonized groan as he confirmed her pessimistic comment with a quick glance to the staggeringly large 'Yet to be Completed' pile.

"Must you destroy all of my happiness?" he asked earnestly.

Ryoko seemed to consider his question for a long moment.

"No, I musn't. But the fact that I'm willing to go that extra mile to do it anyway just shows how dedicated I am to my job!" she replied, smiling cheerfully.

"So, when you summon demons, do more of _you _just appear?"

"Ha ha ha, very funny. Now shut up and go to sleep."

Ryouga rolled his eyes, taking a quick look at the clock as he did. Nearly eleven o'clock already, was it? Actually, sleep didn't sound like all that bad of an idea, now that he thought about it. Still, he couldn't let her get the last word.

"Yes ma'am. Going to bed now, ma'am."

"Awww, Shaddup!"

OOOoooOOO

With a mighty yawn, Hercule finally awoke to inviting rays of the morning sun. Matching his mighty yawn, he followed it with a truly Herculean stretching of his limbs- only to wince instantly as a lance of pain stabbed through his leg.

"Ow! Heh, guess I'm not quite healed yet . . ."

The martial arts legend gingerly pulled his blanket away to reveal the pristine white bandage that wrapped his leg, save for a sizeable circle stained a somewhat crusty brown. He should probably think about changing that before he did anything else, too.

Maybe another day off from work wouldn't hurt . . .

The phone call that he had received from Agent Ikari replayed itself keenly in his mind . . .

Maybe not.

Luckily, as a legendary master of the martial arts, Hercule had become privy to a small number of ancient, some might even say _mystical_ secrets in his time. One in particular suited him quite well, as it was not only an invaluable training supplement, but it was also a quick fix. Hercule loved quick fixes.

Shuffling over to the side of his bed, he quickly began to dig through the classically styled mahogany nightstand placed there. It didn't take him too long to find what he was looking for, even though there hadn't been much need to actually use it as of late. The small leather bag was impossible to miss and he pulled it out with near reverence.

Chuckling happily to himself, a wide smile lifting his bushy mustache, the martial artist then tipped the bag on its side, causing a single, tiny little bean to pop out of the bag and into the palm of his hand. For a short moment, he simply stared at the little green bean.

"Time for a morning pick me up. Heh, Juan Valdez, eat your heart out."

Then, with a quick toss of his head, he popped the bean into his mouth and che-

OOOoooOOO

"-here's no way for you to escape defeat _this _time, Saotome!" Ryouga roared out in challenge.

Ranma just sneered back at him, arms crossed over his chest and unusually spiky hair waving in the wind. "Feh, that's what you say _every _time, Ryouga. What makes this time any different?"

Ryouga smirked, stealthily reaching behind his back for his ultimate weapon. His fingers closed around the familiar, smooth plastic and his confidence increased two-fold. "Because now I have _this_!"

In a flash of movement, Ryouga tore the sphere from his belt and hurled the yellow and black Pokeball at his hated rival.

"_P-Chan, I choose yo-"_

OoO

"-ooaah_hhhhh what the he-_"

Ryouga was torn raggedly from his sleep as his entire world turned upside down and inside out, tossing him about with enough force to drop him face first to the unyielding floor beside his cot. Before he even had a chance to regain his senses, a piercing scream came from outside his cell, as Ryoko plummeted down from the rafters (where she had an unusual penchant for sleeping) and slammed unceremoniously to the hardwood floor herself. A second after _that_, several bright, spinning lights suddenly popped out of the walls and ceilings, flooding the room with red lights dancing to the piercing, ear splitting wail of some damnable hidden siren screaming as if its life depended on it.

It was all the wanderer could do to curl up into a fetal position and clasp his hands over his ears to try to drown out the sensory overload that was threatening to overwhelm him. Tack onto that that he'd had _that _dream again . . . Ryouga was a quivering mass of anguish and confusion incapable of doing anything-

And then the siren died abruptly in a bright burst of light.

Taking a moment to gather himself, Ryouga tentatively looked up from his patch of floor. There, outside his cell, shaking a bit herself, was Ryoko, smoking hand raised up before her. He followed the line of her hand, and the baleful glare she was shooting, to a rather notable hole in the roof. The smoldering edges of the hole were giving off enough smoke to diffuse the morning sun now pouring in, giving the entire office a somewhat ethereal look.

"W-what the hell was that?" he asked, finally steadying himself enough to sit up.

Ryoko turned her glare in his direction. "The hell should I know?"

He shrugged, then carefully flipped his cot back into an upright position so he could sit on it again. Well, you _do _work here . . ."

The cyan haired demoness considered his words for a moment, tapping a thin finger to her chin. "Oh yeeaah."

With that, the Deputy floated over to and through her desk. Taking a moment to push it back to its usual spot, she followed it up with a simple press of a button. A small monitor abruptly lifted up from its surface which the woman began to read intently.

"Hmph, Seismic Activity Alert."

"Yeah, like we needed _that _to tell us there was an earthquake," he grumbled darkly. Stupid computers stating the obvious.

Except Ryoko stared back at him with a look bereft of her usual mirth or malevolence . . . it worried him more than a bit. "It's not that. This alarm is only triggered when the seismic activity is enough to actually threaten the GeoFront. Remember, Genius, we're _underground_, so if it quakes hard enough, it's over for everyone."

Ryouga didn't have to think about that for very long. "Oh man, that _is _bad. If that alarm actually went off, there must be a _ton _of worried people down here now."

Ryoko's amber eyes widened. "Oh crap! That means-"

Whatever the Deputy was going to say, her voice was abruptly interrupted as the phone chose that moment to begin ringing loudly, every single light on the base blinking on simultaneously. It was followed less than half a minute later by the sounds of frantic knocking coming from the front door. The delightfully wide glass front of the office gave an excellent view of the crush of worried faces currently crowding the front of the building.

Ryoko groaned loudly, dropping her face into her hands. "Damnit . . . where's Hercule when you need him?"

OOOoooOOO

Gendo slammed down the receiver with more force than he ever remembered using.

"Damnit, where is Hercule when you need him?"

"Now, Dear, please don't get so worked up."

Despite the currently spiraling situation, Gendo still found himself smiling fondly at the mere sound of that angelic voice. He took a moment to compose himself before turning to face the lovely young woman standing by his desk.

"I'm sorry, Yui. It's just so . . . frustrating. I never imagined what this job actually entailed when they offered it to me, and having to work with my hands tied in such a ridiculous manner . . . it's-it's just-"

"Frustrating?" she replied with a smile. "I understand, Dear, and I'm so proud of you, that even with things the way they are, you are still doing such an amazing job."

He looked up into her eyes, drinking in her gaze like honeyed wine. "Thank you. I think I need to hear that every once in awhile. Still, that last tremor worries me. Hopefully Washu will finally come to her senses and look into it, now."

His blushing bride (Mere weeks since the honeymoon) nodded encouragingly. "I can speak to her for you, if you would like."

Gendo simply nodded, unable to convey the gratitude he felt. Unfortunately, even the sweet joy of knowing someone else would deal with Washu was short lived.

"Of course, then there is still our _other _crisis." He leafed through a large stack of paper on his desk to no avail. "So far the audit of all registered research projects has _yet _to turn up any missing, or active experiments which even resemble the description of the creature that Dr. Saotome gave us. Unfortunately, since this falls into the experimental incident category, it means that none of our researchers can actually intervene. And _that _means that we have to rely on Ryoko and Hercule . . . who _isn't _answering his _phone_," muttered the Government Liaison through clenched teeth.

Yui's eyes rolled in amusement at his obvious frustration. "I'm certain that the Sheriff has a very good reason for not answering his phone."

As much as he loved the woman, Gendo could only stare at her incredulously.

". . . On second though, maybe you should send someone over to the Sheriff's to check on him."

Gendo smiled widely; it was always good when someone saw the light. "An excellent idea." Of course, his smile faded quickly. "It looks like it will be yet another busy morning here. Alright, then: You see if you can talk some sense into Washu, please. I'll send someone by Hercule's when I get the chance. Meanwhile, I'll see if I can convince Ryoko to continue investigating our 'monster'. Then I will begin preparations for a full scale evacuation, if such a thing becomes necessary."

Yui nodded, a slightly strained smile on her lips. "Better safe than sorry, after all."

He returned her smile, though his was even weaker.

"Why does it always seem to be so little of the former and so very much of the latter here?"

OOOoooOOO

Ryoko angrily slammed the phone down, only to pick it up a fraction of a second later.

"_No_! I _didn't _notice the giant earthquake that triggered the alarm system! I'm sorry, I don't have time for your crazy stories!"

She slammed it down, killing one of the blinking lights, only for another for flare to life in its place. She tore the receiver up from the base yet again and snarled into it. "That _wasn't _an earthquake, it was _me _getting ready to blast the city to ash! . . . What was your address again?"

She slammed the phone down again, this time leaving the half melted plastic device smoldering on her desk as she looked up to address the throng of eggheads surrounding her desk.

"Look, I know for a fact that anyone actually powerful enough to kick my ass _isn't _worried about fifty million metric tons of rock falling on their heads, so-" she paused for a moment to form her energy sword, pointing it threateningly at the people across her desk. "-Unless you want me to save you all the trouble of a _cave in _killing you, then _get the hell out_!"

Just as it looked like a number of the more self important scientists were about to argue her logical decree, she decided to nip it in the bud. A second later, there was a second smoking hole in the ceiling, courtesy of a thrown energy sword, and roughly ten seconds after _that, _she was blissfully alone once more.

With a huff, the Deputy slumped back into her chair . . . only to see Ryouga lounging back on his cot. For some reason, the over evolved primate was shaking his head as he looked at her.

"_What_?"

"Nothing – nothing . . . Just, all those people were looking for was a little reassurance. You didn't really need to treat them like that, did you? They can't help it if they're scared."

Ryoko rolled her eyes in annoyance. "I can't exactly give 'em what I don't have. I don't know what's going on any more than you do. D'ya want me to _lie _to them?"

She smirked slightly as the male shook his head. "No . . . no, I guess not. Still . . ."

_Gah, what was with some people? _"Look on the bright side. At least none of them are scared of the _earthquake _anymore."

The corner of the fanged man's lips actually quirked up at that. "You have an amazing talent for finding silver linings."

"Why thank y-"

Yet again, the phone interrupted her. She gazed at the phone silently. She then noticed Ryouga looking at her, thus prompting her to return his stare. His stare then purposefully shifted to the phone on her desk. It didn't take very much to piece together the message he was sending. With a sigh, she picked up the slightly twisted receiver once more.

"Hello, Ryoko's house of empty promises and false hope. Don't worry, citizen, that wasn't an earthquake, the planet is just having a tummy ache."

"Very cute, Deputy. I'm glad to see our taxpayer dollars are going to good use."

Ryoko instantly covered the mouthpiece and let out a string of profanities that had her companion's eyes nearly bugging out from his skull. Once she got that out of her system, she quickly calmed herself and lifted the phone back to her ear.

"Why _Agent Ikari_, what a . . . _pleasure _it is to hear from you."

"Enough nonsense, Deputy. I am sending all of the information gathered on the escaped experiment to your workstation. I want you to continue your investigation into this matter."

The space pirate looked at the phone oddly for a moment. ". . . But what about that tremor?"

The voice on the other end of the line never wavered for a moment from its cold tone. "That is being dealt with by . . . less whimsical personnel. You will continue your investigation, is that understood?"

"B-but, but I've still got Saotome's buddy in custody! What am I supposed to do with him?"

A short pause.

"Take him along. His talents may prove useful if your investigation goes well. Agent Ikari out."

With a sharp click, Ryoko was treated to the nerve grating sound of dial tone. She glared at the receiver in her hand for a long moment.

"I _hate _it when he does that," she muttered darkly. She then shifted her equally dark glare to the caged boy to her side.

"Alright then, Mr. 'Man of the People'. Gendo wants us to keep hunting down that rat thing, so let's get a move on."

"Us? What do you mean _us_?" He shot her a stand-offish look.

"Did I stutter?" she barked gruffly. "I can't leave you here, and you actually helped out a bit last time, so Gendo told me to get your help on this."

Her companion stressed his limited gray matter for a long moment, before finally shrugging. "Why not? Beats spending my last hours doing paper work. So, where we going?"

The rather strapping Alpha Male then stood up, opening the unlocked cell door to join her by her desk. As he did, she took the time to push yet another button on her desk. This one ejected her Personal Data Assistant from the desk and she picked up the tiny, hand held device and activated it. The small screen flashed to life, and the data which Gendo had just downloaded to her computer began to scroll down its surface.

"Hey! This is just all the info that _we _sent them! Damn slackers, expecting me to do Hercule's job without anything to go on."

Her companion scratched his chin, looking so cute in his attempt to access any higher faculties he might possess.

"Well, if everyone is so sure this is an experiment we're after, why not go to where the experiments are being done?"

Ryoko smiled at that. _Hey, maybe he has a few brain cells to go with that six pack he's carrying around._ "Hey, not bad. I bet if we crack a few eggheads, we're bound to find _something _out."

Ryouga shrugged, looking a little sheepish at her faint praise. "Alright then, so I guess you're driving, eh?"

Oh, how evil Ryoko's smile was at _that_.

OOOoooOOO

Ryouga collapsed to his knees, the only thing stopping him from actually kissing the pavement beneath him being the presence of his spiky haired tormentor standing right behind him.

"Heh, ya big baby."

He took another moment to catch his breath before glaring back at the cyan haired demoness. "I would have been fine if you hadn't started _stunt flying_!"

"_Heeheehee_!"

The fanged warrior just _glared _at her. "Can we just get this over with? After _that_, I'm actually missing Ranma's driving."

Ryoko shrugged, before startling him slightly by offering him a hand to his feet. Not wanting to be rude, he took the offered hand and allowed the tremendously strong female to tug him up to his feet.

On the bright side (if there was such a thing), Ryoko _had _gotten them to their destination in record time. The familiar shape of the black pyramid loomed before them. The really, _really _huge, mammoth, sprawling black pyramid which looked big enough that it had could have been built _from _several football stadiums . . .

The two Ryo's stared at the structure for a looooong moment. Slowly, Ryouga turned to Ryoko. "This . . . might take longer than we thought."

"Where the heck are we even supposed to start?"

"Hey, Deputy 'Yoko!"

The unexpected call caused Ryoko to glower immediately, before she spun on the speaker . . . Only to realize that the person whom had called out was actually a young, blue haired girl skipping happily in their direction. Ryouga boggled as the dark glower that Ryoko had been wearing only a moment earlier evaporated to nothing, leaving a wry smile on her lips.

"Hey there, Bulma. What are you up to?" stated the Deputy in a carefree tone.

The young girl, probably only eight or so, by Ryouga's guess, stopped before them, swaying back and forth in that adorable manner that young girls did. "Oh, I got all worried 'cuz of that really loud alarm, so I wanted to come check on Daddy and make sure he's alright."

Ryoko smirked. "Knowing Dr. Briefs, I doubt he even noticed."

"Dr. Briefs?" Ryouga asked himself. He then dropped to his knees, bringing himself more to the young girl's height. "Hey there, little girl. I don't suppose you know anyone named Tarou, or Happosai, do you?"

The young blue head shook her head, looking back at him shyly, only to scoot away completely to stand on the far side of Ryoko. "I'm not supposed to talk to strangers . . ."

Ryouga turned his attention to the amber eyed Deputy, shooting her a telling look. Luckily, she seemed to get the gist of his silent cry for help, as she smiled wryly once again. "Hey, don't worry, kid. This here is Ryouga. He's one of the good guys today."

Bulma's eyes widened in wonder at the Deputy's words. "One of the _good guys_?"

Ryoko nodded. "Yup, just as good as me!"

Instantly, Bulma shot five feet back from the both of them.

"Hey!" barked an offended Ryouga.

The demoness laughed wickedly at the sight. "Sorry, sorry. I'm just teasin ya, Bulma. Hibiki here is alright. He even helped me kick a monster's butt yesterday."

If anything, Bulma's eyes widened even further. "Wow! Was it the escaped experiment that everyone is talkin' 'bout?"

Ryouga started at that. _Hmmmm_. "Yeah – yeah, I'm pretty sure it was. Say, Bulma, have you heard anything else about this creature? Ryoko and I are kind of looking for it."

The young girl shook her head quickly. "Uh-uh. No one's owning up to this one yet."

The wanderer shot his erstwhile partner a look. "_This one_?"

The Deputy shrugged in response. "You probably shouldn't to ask."

He filed that particularly disturbing thought away for later perusal, then turned back to the young Bulma. "Hey, you seem like a super smart little girl. Can you tell me if you know anyone that works on that kind of stuff? You know, messing with animal DNA?"

His compliment worked wonders, as the young girl literally beamed with joy, but before she could answer Ryoko cut her off rudely. "What are you askin' her for? The audit hasn't turned up anything that matches the description we're looking for."

It was Ryouga's turn to smile knowingly (The Gods knew it happened maybe twice in a life time for him.) "Yeah, but what if the description they're using isn't the right one? The creatures that Hercule and I fought when I got here were much smaller and looked different than the one we fought yesterday. What if it changed so much that the people looking through the experiments wouldn't recognize it?"

At his side, Bulma made an impressed little 'oooh' sound. "That's really smart, Mr. 'Yoga."

Ryouga ran his hand through his hair, feeling a little sheepish at being praised by a young girl. "Not really. I just had a little more information is all. I'm sure the Sheriff would have figured it out if he was here."

When the pair of females before him suddenly burst out into boisterous laughter, Ryouga was forced to reconsider his statement. _No respect for near-legendary martial arts masters these days, I swear._

"_Anyway_," he interrupted their laughter as best he could, "Can you tell us if you know anyone that would be able to make a mutant rat?"

Finally calming down to a mere giggle fit, Bulma nodded excitedly. "I know bunches! Let's go ask around."

At that, Ryouga finally rose back to his feet, shooting a victorious smile in Ryoko's direction. "There, that wasn't so hard, now was it?"

"Oh, shut up."

Their tiny tour guide began to hum a happy little tune as she skipped them merrily up to one of the many entrances to the massive pyramid. Just as they reached one of the turnstiles outside the security doors, Bulma fished an ID card from her pocket, only to swipe it through one of the scanners with barely a second thought.

"Bulma Briefs and two guests! Deputy 'Yoko and my new boyfriend!"

A mere moment later, the light on the turnstile flashed green, allowing them to pass through (as if it could even slow down Ryouga or Ryoko) and the security door behind it slid open to admit them.

Ryouga shot the Deputy a quick look before leaning close to whisper, "_Boyfriend_?"

Ryoko chuckled mercilessly, before whispering back. "Ah, just play along." The cyan haired demoness then turned to the young girl leading their way. "But, _Bulma_, what about your _old _boyfriend?"

Bulma turned back to them to make a sour face. "Mr. Ranma isn't one of the _good guys_! He's just a researcher, like my _dad_, ick!"

Ryouga couldn't have stopped himself from smiling even if he'd wanted to . . . which he didn't. "Ranma, eh? I think I can live with that." It was about then that he paused, as something else suddenly came to his attention. "Hey, wait a second. You _work _here, Bulma?"

The blue haired girl nodded proudly. "Uh-huh! I'm in the Child Genius Division!" She then leaned towards him, whispering conspiratorially, "You can't tell no one, but me and Dexter are gonna finish our spatial compression project _waaay _before Newtron finishes his Quantum Dynamics research."

The bandanna clad wanderer chuckled in amusement. "I bet you _are_."

With that, Bulma's adorable smile widened again and she charged ahead excitedly. "C'mon, follow me! I'll take ya to the Genetics Division."

His cyan haired companion shot him a teasing smirk. "Well, aren't you the ladies man?"

He replied with a helpless shrug. "Pretty much the opposite, normally, but she's a sweet kid. Now c'mon, _Deputy, _we don't want to get left behind."

Ryoko just shook her head, an expression of pure amusement on her face, but didn't press the issue. After that, the duo were left to the whims of their adolescent guide as she led them on a winding tour of the facility. (Well, at least to Ryouga it sure seemed like a winding tour.)

"Hi, Professor Membrane!" Bulma called out as they passed one lab.

"No time to talk, Bulma. _Science _waits for no man!"

Which set the tone for the next fifteen minutes or so, as they continued to wander the halls of the pyramid.

"Hey, Dr. Stingray!"

"Sylia says hi!"

"Hi, Dr. Gero!"

"Insufferable children!"

Until, as a nice change of pace, someone actually decided to speak to _them_. Ryouga wasn't quite sure what to make of the lady that stopped them. She wore the typical getup that everyone else was wearing: lab coat, pocket protector, etc, and her hair was relatively short-ish, but despite all that, she still came off as being quite attractive, even friendly. Bulma's reaction intrigued the wanderer the most, as the young girl stopped right before the lady, looking down at her own shoes as she dug her petite toe into the unyielding floor.

"Hello, Missus Ikari." Bulma greeted the older woman shyly.

The thusly dubbed 'Missus Ikari' crouched down to rub her hand vigorously through Bulma's lopsided blue hair. "Hello you adorable little scientist, you."

Even as the adorable little scientist started to blush like a tomato, Ryouga leaned towards Ryoko and mouthed: '_Missus Ikari_?'

His companion simply shrugged.

Which was about the point that Mrs. Ikari looked up from Bulma to stare at the pair of them. After studying them for a moment, the older researcher turned back to Bulma. "So, who's your new friend, you blue haired cutie?"

Though it scarcely seemed possible, Bulma blushed even harder. "This is my new boyfriend, 'Yoga Hibki. He's one of the _good guys_."

"Is he, now?" Mrs. Ikari replied with an impish smile. She then stood once more and nodded to Ryoko. "Deputy, always a pleasure."

Ryoko offered a weak smile in reply. "You know it . . ."

Then it was Ryouga's turn to get acknowledged. The older woman held out a hand to him in a very western gesture. Still, it wasn't like he hadn't been around the block a few times, so he took the hand and shook it like one might shake a Faberge egg.

"And it's a pleasure to finally meet you as well, Mr. Hibiki. My name is Yui Ikari."

Doing a quick check to make sure he hadn't damaged the delicate looking researcher in any way, he quickly retrieved his hand and ran it through his shaggy mop of hair. "Uh, thanks, I guess. You make it sound like you've been expecting me."

Yui offered him a sly little smile. "Well, it is a small town, and everyone knows that gossip clocks in as just a _little _faster than the speed of light. Besides, you've already made a pretty big impression here. Saving the Sheriff, helping the Deputy fight an escaped experiment, a mysterious past with Dr. Saotome-" she winked teasingly, "-and you've already found yourself a lovely girlfriend. All in two days no less."

He chuckled weakly, a little embarrassed. "Well, it _has _been a slow couple of days . . ."

The knowledgeable researcher giggled in amusement. "I heard that you even had the pleasure of meeting my husband already, as well. He didn't traumatize you too badly, did he?"

Ryouga gave her the flattest look he was capable of. "Agent Ikari gave me a choice between being shot and filling out the Global Dynamics Non-Disclosure Agreement."

"You'd be surprised how many people choose the former."

He rolled his eyes. "Not anymore I wouldn't."

A loud groan from their side drew their attention to Ryoko. "Look, I'm sure this is all _fascinating_, but we're kinda busy here?"

"Ryoko . . ." Ryouga admonished, though he doubted it would accomplish anything.

Yui just waved off the Deputy's rudeness with a casual wave of her hand. "Of course you're right, Deputy, I apologize. Tell me, what _are _you doing here? Is there any way that I can help?"

Bulma chose that moment to reiterate herself into the conversation, shaking her head proudly. "Nope! They asked me to help 'em find a geneticist that has the expertise to create mutant rodents."

Dr. Ikari's eyes widened a fraction of an inch. "Ahh, trying to find out who is responsible, are they? But the audit still hasn't found an experiment that matches Dr. Saotome's description, has it?"

Their blue haired genius smiled widely. "That's cuz the experiment is still mutating! It doesn't look like t started out, so that's why the audit isn't gonna find it!"

An appraising look filled the researcher's eyes. "Is that so? And how do you know that, Bulma?"

"Cuz, 'Yoga fought em when he helped the Sheriff out and they were way smaller then."

Ryouga nodded in confirmation. "It's true. It's been a bit, but I still remember them pretty well. If we use the original description, we might have better luck."

His cyan haired partner glowered at that. "It _was _all in my report. Not my fault you guys are so slack."

Rather than rise to the bait, Yui simply rolled her eyes. "Ryoko, I _read _your report. The _only _description you gave was 'giant mutant rat'. Did you even _think _to ask for a slightly more detailed description, such as size and color?"

Ryoko tapped the tips of her fingers together, looking down to the floor. ". . . I was getting around to it . . ."

Dr. Ikari let out a huff. "I have a half a mind to take me with you to speak to your mother-"

The stricken look that plastered itself across the Deputy's face was almost heartbreaking, until one remembered what a jerk she could be most of the time.

"-But, until the Sheriff returns to work, this investigation is your responsibility."

The sigh of relief that Ryoko let out was easily on par with the ones that Ryouga reserved for finding a bathhouse in the middle of a crazed chef chase. Come to think of it, one of these days Ryouga was going to have to call the Health Inspectors on those people. Really, who just picked up animals off the sidewalk? There was no way that could be sanitary!

"Bulma, since you're going to the Genetics Division anyway, why don't you take them to Dr. Saotome's lab first? He might be able to help the three of you out." Yui made the suggestion, oblivious to the pained expression that spread across Ryouga's face.

Bulma nodded happily. "Okay, Misses Ikari! You can count on me!"

"Deputy, Mr. Hibiki, best of luck." Dr. Ikari nodded to both of them before gracefully making her way on whatever her original course may have been, leaving Ryouga, Ryoko and Bulma on their own once more.

Sense of purpose instilled, Bulma led them through the facility and to the elusive Genetics Division in a matter of minutes. All too soon, the moment that Ryouga was dreading was at hand, and they soon found themselves standing before the entrance of one of the smaller labs on the outer fringes of the Division. Without even bothering to knock, if such a thing was even necessary in a place like this, Bulma walked straight into the lab.

As soon as they entered, though, all of Ryouga's annoyance drained away, replaced by mirthful snickering. The wanderer quickly covered his mouth, doing his best to hide the obscene smile on his face at the sight before him:

Ranma Saotome, Heir to the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts . . . wearing a lab coat and hunched over a microscope. At the sound of his chuckling, the pigtailed martial artist stood up, only to reveal that his ensemble came complete with pocket protector and a pair of safety goggles hanging around his neck.

Ranma glowered in his direction. "What's so funny, Pork Rind?"

It took some effort, but Ryouga managed to keep himself from bursting out into full-blown laughter. "N-nothing at _all _. . . _Doctor _Saotome."

At his side, Ryoko and Bulma started giggling as well.

"Oh, shut it," grumbled the male researcher. "So, what are you guys here for, then? Earthquake, or rats?"

With hardly a care, Ryoko floated forward, and through, Ranma's desk, glancing idly around the room. Then, as an after thought, she gave a simple shrug of her shoulders. "Rats. We're trying to narrow down who could be responsible and we figure they're probably in this division."

At that thought, Ryouga gave his eternal rival an odd look. "Speaking of this Division, what are you doing in the Genetics lab anyway? I thought you were trying to prove that chi was based on psychic energy."

The pigtailed researcher grumbled darkly to himself. "We prefer the term _Psionics_ . . . makes it sound less like Miss Cleo. And my research actually covers a lot of ground. I got labs in quite a few sections, even Section Five."

Ryouga shot Ryoko an inquisitive glance.

"Military Research."

"Ahhh. So, what are you _researching _here, oh Master of Psionics?"

His barb didn't get the desired effect, as Ranma smirked confidently. "Why don't ya come over here and find out, Bacon Bits?"

Growling at the return of his long forgotten nick-name, Ryouga felt compelled to see just what his rival was talking about before he pummeled him into submission. Ranma cleared some of the junk off his desk, then pointed to a pair of monitors that sat on its surface. Both showed what appeared to be human muscle tissue, at least to Ryouga's best guess. However, even to his limited knowledge, one of the samples looked to be incredibly more dense than the other . . .

"What's all this then?" the wanderer asked, more than a little confused.

"My research into the use of Psionics to alter one's own physiology. The one on the left is from a random person. The other one is mine. You see, the theory is that the more skilled martial artists, like ourselves, have been subconsciously using our internal energies to . . . _sculpt _our bodies to be better suited to the rigors of martial arts."

Ryouga could only offer his rival a skeptical look.

"Hey, I was skeptical too, but I was talking to this Captain guy, he transferred from Unetco to Section Five a few months ago-"

"Um, what the heck is Unetco?" Ryouga felt compelled to ask.

Ryoko plopped her butt down on Ranma's desk and leaned towards them, a bored expression on her face. "Meh, they're pretty much a military version of the MIB, cept the government actually knows about them."

Ryouga just stared at the both of them. ". . . And the MIB is . . .?"

Ranma shook his head in annoyance. "Look, it ain't nothing you gotta worry about. _Anyway_, this Captain guy I was talking to, he was big on Psionics and he proposed a few theories to me, and I gotta admit, they started making sense after a bit. I mean, don't you think it's odd that you can lift multiple tons, leap over tall buildings, or even get hit by a car without even bruising?"

As much as he hated to admit it, since the idea clashed so dramatically with his own views on the spiritual nature of chi, Ryouga had to admit that he _hadn't _thought about it. ". . . not really . . . I've just been able to do that kind of thing as long as I can remember."

Ranma nodded expertly. "Exactly. Think about it. If Cologne had strapped a normal person into that harness for the Bakusai Tenketsu training, what would have happened?"

Ryouga shuddered at the mental image that was conjured. "They probably would have been splattered."

"That's right. _That's _why it's such an advanced technique, because you have to have conditioned yourself to a high degree just to survive the training. Now if I can determine _how _and _why _these alterations take place, imagine what we could accomplish here?"

Ryouga could only look at the small screens in awe. ". . . I hate to admit it, but some of the stuff you're saying is making a scary kind of sense . . ."

His rival smirked that familiar smirk of his. "Remind me to get a tissue sample from you later, too. I bet your development is completely different from mine."

The fanged fighter nodded absently, interested in what those results could possibly be, despite himself.

Unfortunately, any further discussion was tabled by a rather loud clearing of the throat from beside them. Both martial artists turned to see both Ryoko and Bulma, arms crossed over their chests, shooting them impatient glares.

"If you two are done, we do have an investigation to get back to."

Ranma looked to Ryouga, who looked back, they could almost see what each other were thinking.

"You know, Ryoko," Ryouga started slyly, "You _are _the Deputy here. You should be able to handle this without us. I mean, I'm just here so you can keep an eye on me, right?"

Ryoko's amber eyes rolled magnificently. "Pffft, whatever. You think you're gonna get me all proud and indignant? You forget just how unmotivated I am. You already proved that you're a useful lackey, so now you're stuck with me. You too, Saotome, now let's go already."

Bulma nodded excitedly, even as both boys sighed in defeat, then latched onto Ryouga's arm. "C'mon, 'Yoga, let's go find the bad guy!"

Ryouga smirked at the crestfallen look that crashed down onto his rival's face. "Hey, what's going on, Bulma?"

Apparently feeling a little bad, Bulma offered the researcher a sad look. "Sorry, Dr. Saotome, but I can't be your girlfriend anymore. I'm 'Yoga's girlfriend now!"

"Wha-but-" stuttered the pigtailed martial artist.

At least until Ryoko clouted him upside the head. The smile on her face was anything but supportive. "Just let it go, Lady Fingers."

Ranma glowered at the Deputy, but reluctantly relented.

"So," Ryoko began anew, "Where are we even gonna start? There must be dozens of geneticists that work here."

Bulma offered a tiny little shrug. "Dr. Akagi might know. She's the Head of the Genetics Division."

Ryouga, Ryoko and Ranma all looked to each other before shrugging. It was a lead, at least, so it was worth checking out.

"I just can't figure out why anyone would want to make giant rodents. I mean, what would be the point?" asked a confused Hibiki as they began to wander through the facility once again.

Ranma shrugged absently. "Most people use rodents for test subjects. Heck, one of our researchers used to _be _a test , , , subject . . ."

In an eerie moment of synchronization, Ranma and Bulma stopped walking and turned to look at each other, eyes widening in surprise. Slowly, a wicked grin formed on the pigtailed researcher's lips.

"Are _you_ thinking what _I'm_ thinking Bulma?"

Bulma nodded eagerly. "I sure am!" She then turned back and hugged Ryouga's arm tightly. "Great thinking, 'Yoga! You're a genius, too!"

"Hey! _I _thought of it!"

Ryouga turned back and shot a helpless look to Ryoko.

"Do you have _any _idea what these two are talking about?"

The demoness could only shake her head in disbelief. "Three apples, the Queen of England and a pair of rubber pants make more sense than those two."

The wanderer chuckled quietly to himself as he allowed himself to be dragged frantically down the hallway by his 'girlfriend'. Within a matter of minutes, being led by the purposeful pair of Ranma and Bulma, the four of themselves found themselves in yet another lab. This one was much darker and more cluttered than Saotome's, a fact which surprised Ryouga to no end. Books, boxes and other paraphernalia was stacked around all of the desks and counters, as if there wasn't enough storage room in the entire building to accommodate this one researcher.

Of course, after about five seconds of looking around the room, Ryouga quickly nodded to himself.

"Ummm . . . yeah, looks like we've found our culprit." The Lost One quickly followed up his statement by pointing to the large set of cages stacked beside and on top of each other at the far end of the room. Barring one, all of the cages were filled with two to three foot long, snow white lab mice. Two to three foot long, snow white lab mice that Ryouga remembered very keenly from his first night in town. Speaking of which, he still needed to get his umbrella fixed, not to _mention _finding a new pair of slippers! He looked down to the tattered and worn remains of what had been his dress slippers only days earlier.

_The world is a dark and lonely place . . . without shoes._

Even as he lamented his inability to own a decent pair of footwear, Ryoko floated forward, scanning the room carefully. "Umm, so where's the culprit then?"

Again, Ranma smirked his infuriating smirk. "Hey, Brain, you got visitors!"

From somewhere within the darkness, a small rustling sound could barely be made out.

"Yes – yes, Saotome, just a moment, please."

Ryoko floated forward, looking around aggressively. "Hey! We don't got a moment. Get your geeky butt out here already!"

"Ahh, if it isn't our infamous Deputy Ryoko. To what do I owe this auspicious visit?"

"You owe it to me kickin' your . . ." The Deputy trailed off uncertainly, still looking for the source of the voice. "To me kickin-" A frantic spin. "_Hey_! Where the heck are you?"

To their side, Ranma chuckled in amusement, before pointing to one of the nearby desktops. Ryouga followed the line of his rival's finger, only to blink three times at what he saw. There, standing atop the desk was a . . . was a small white lab mouse – a lab mouse with a hugely disproportionate head.

"'Kicking my butt'? I must say, that sounds simply atrocious, if utterly one sided. Why ever would you want to do that?"

Ryouga blinked again. Even by his standards, things were getting a little strange- _Wait a second_! Ryouga snapped his fingers excitedly. "Hey! Are you one of those Pan-Dimensional, Hyper-Intelligent-"

"**No!**"

The wanderer shrunk back at the sharp rebuttal, only for Ryoko to surge forward, an unimpressed glare on her face. "Okay, that's enough of that, Rodentia. We know that you're behind that monster rat rampaging through the city."

If anything, Brain looked askance at the Deputy. "Monster rat? I can assure you, Misses Deputy, that I haven't created any monsters here."

A deep growl rumbled in the Deputy's throat. "Bull!" She then pointed back to Ryouga. "He saw your experiments with his own eyes."

At which point, the talking mouse turned his attention to Ryouga as well – only to point dramatically a moment later.

"**You**!"

Ryouga pointed to himself, a little uncertain. "Me?"

Brain frowned deeply. "You! You're the one, along with that bumbling oaf of a Sheriff, that attacked my test subjects!"

If anything, the wanderer was only more confused. "Attacked? What are you talking about? I stepped in to help Hercule because your rodents were attacking _him_."

"Preposterous. My test subjects are completely docile unless expose to hostile intent. I had let them out on a routine test run several days ago, when the Sheriff attacked _them_. The fool obviously didn't understand what was occurring."

Ryoko scoffed loudly. "And you expect us to just take your word for this?"

Brain scoffed right back at her. "Of course not. Those are test subjects, not pets. Not only are they tagged with radio transmitters, they have also been implanted with optical transceivers so that I may record their interactions and behavior patterns."

Well, _that _brought everyone up short.

"Well, I don't know about everyone else, but that sounds like the kind of thing an investigating authority figure should probably watch," offered an overly smug Saotome.

"Oh, shut up!" rebutted a witty Ryoko.

A little tentatively, Ryouga raised his hand up. "Ahh, before you show us that. Just why are you mutating all of these rodents in the first place?"

Brain looked back at him suspiciously. "Certainly not in a bid to _take over the world_, if that is what you are insinuating."

Ryouga looked at the talking mouse oddly . . . more oddly. "I . . . uh, never mentioned taking over the world."

"_Good_! Because that isn't what my research is for!"

At that point, Bulma stepped forward, wearing an adorably innocent expression. "Then what _is _it for?"

Brain looked at the overly cute child, but what only able to hold out for single moment before letting out a defeated sigh.

"If you must know . . ."

"Oh, we _must_," added a smirking Ryoko.

"I am . . . trying to develop a means to enhance my own body to human size." Brain finally admitted, sounding more that a slightly embarrassed at his confession.

Ryouga, Ranma and Ryoko all nodded in understanding. Bulma, however, just looked more confused. "Why would you wanna do that?"

Again, the research turned researcher sighed tiredly. "For various reasons, Child. While accommodating, this facility is hardly designed with lab mice in mind . . . aside from the _obvious _at any rate. And though my mechanical suit is useful, it is far too bulky and clumsy for the kinds of work which I must routinely do here . . . and – and it does get tiring always having ones contemporaries looking down at you all the time."

Apparently the Deputy had heard enough, as she let out an agonized groan. "Alright, alright! We've heard your sob story. Now, am I the only one here that notices the empty cage? _Brain_, you got some '_splainin _to do!"

The tiny researcher let out an annoyed huff. "If you _must _know, Subject Number Nine did not return from the altercation with the Sheriff and this brute."

Ranma stared incredulously at the talking mouse. "Wait. One of your subjects _vanished_, and you didn't think to report it?"

Brain met the incredulous stare with an indignant glower. "I had _assumed _it had been terminated in the battle." The large headed mouse then spun dramatically, producing a tiny remote which he pointed at a bank of monitors lining the one wall. "_Behold_!"

The center monitor suddenly flared to life, showing a very poorly lit, but still discernible forestscape. Apparently they were watching some kind of POV camera, as the scene moved and jerked around constantly. Considering that Ryouga spent an unfortunate amount of his life seeing the world from that particular Point Of View, it didn't take him long to determine they were seeing what the rat was seeing as it scurried through the forest.

Then, without warning, the screen suddenly spun around jarringly, settling a moment later on the barely visible form of Hercule leaping heroically out of the underbrush. The impossibly tall figure pointed dramatically at the camera, then swept to both sides, likely encompassing the entire pack. It was obvious that the Sheriff was yelling something, but apparently the rats weren't wired for sound, so they couldn't make out what he was saying. The POV didn't change, so apparently the rodents were just as confused as the audience, choosing to just sit still and stare at the imposing figure.

The still picture doesn't last for long, though, as Hercule suddenly charged forward and began attacking one of the rodents to the left of Subject Number Nine.

A second later, the screen became an indiscernible blur of motion. White and black and other brief flashes of color filled the screen as the entire pack of mutant mice endeavored to defend itself from the Sheriff's attacks.

Even this scene didn't last long, though, as abruptly a new figure entered the fray, this one adding a bright flash of yellow and black to the world that wasn't present before. It didn't take long for the blur of yellow and black to resolve itself into a barely recognizable Ryouga Hibiki. And it doesn't take long for _that _figure to resolve itself into an image of a slippered foot flying directly into the camera at high speed.

The only thing they saw after that, was static.

Brain turned to glare at Ryouga once again.

"While I grudgingly admit that it is feasible that his young man's attack may have only destroyed the implants which allowed me to monitor Subject Number Nine, it is theoretically _improbable _for a mere martial arts kick to transmogrify it into the creature described in Saotome's report. The method I have been using has been a process of small, stable mutations. Such rapid and radical changes haven't been noted in _any _of the other test subjects."

Ryouga looked up to the ceiling, he could already see where this was going. "Why am I sensing a 'There's only one way to be sure' coming?"

The miniature researcher nodded in confirmation. "Indeed. The natural conclusion is to capture the creature so that it may be examined."

Ryouga was about to rebut that point strongly- when the room around them began to shake jarringly. Ryoko quickly scooped up Bulma, even as Ranma plucked Brain off of the desk as cages rattles, book stacks collapsed and furniture relocated itself. The squeaking of the caged rodents was nearly deafening as they tried to escape their confinement.

Then, a moment later, it was done.

"And the sooner the better, it would seem," continued Brain, not looking terribly concerned by the turn of events. "We might be ordered to evacuate soon."

Ryouga let out a defeated sigh. "Alright, but I'm not fighting that monster again."

Brain simply stared at him like he was quite mad. "Fight it? Do you spend all of your days in the Dark Ages?"

Before Ryouga could reply, the talking mouse pointed his tiny remote at the wall next to the caged rodents. A moment later, a good section of the wall slid away, revealing what looked to be a very advanced gun rack. The large number of feathered darts hanging around the various rifle-styled weapons made it more than obvious just what type of guns these were.

Ryoko smiled wickedly.

"Now _that's _what I'm talkin' 'bout!"

OOOoooOOO

Gendo looked up from the holographic screen of Washu's theoretical laptop to the scientist herself.

"So, what does it mean?"

Washu spun the imaginary screen back around to face herself.

"Besides imminent disaster? I'm not actually sure. Honestly, if the seismic activity hadn't spiked so dramatically, I wouldn't have even noticed it."

The Government Liaison folded his hands before his mouth as he stared impassively at the screen. It was currently displaying a very detailed schematic of the entire GeoFront. The Global Dynamics facility and the town were both displayed, as was the incomplete city currently hanging from the roof of the cavern.

Disturbingly, not far beneath the town, there was a . . . a large empty _space_. It looked almost as if there were another cavern forming within the massive cavern which contained the entirety of the GeoFront, only this one was growing right beneath the town itself.

"What I don't understand," he admittedly freely, "Is why the entire city hasn't collapsed yet. To have such a vast absence appear so quickly, it simply can't be stable. Perhaps it is filled with water, or some other such substance?"

Sadly, Washu shook her head in the negative. "No, there's nothing there. I need more time to make a more detailed scan, but all I can say is that it defies explanation at the moment."

For her to admit that she wasn't sure what was keeping the city from caving in on itself so quickly, that just couldn't be a good sign. He wasn't sure what to think himself yet, either, so he continued to stare at the catastrophic image impassively.

"Hmmm-"

Only to have his musing interrupted by the ringing of his phone. Without blinking an eye, Agent Ikari activated the videophone on his desk. I took him only a second to recognize the caller.

"Report, Sergeant Sagura."

The sharp looking man on the small screen saluted crisply.

"I have located the Sheriff, Agent Ikari."

"Excellent. I would like to speak to him immediately."

Sagura didn't hesitate for a second as he replied. "That will be impossible, sir. The Sheriff is currently incapacitated."

_What? But Hercule is one of the strongest fighters on the planet_!

"Incapacitated? Explain," Gendo ordered sharply.

"It would be easier to simply show you."

With that, the screen suddenly shifted away from the cold face of Sergeant Sagura to settle on-

Gendo's eyes widened in shock at what he saw.

"I'll be there in twelve minutes."

With a quick press of a button, he terminated a call and turned back to Washu. She nodded in response to his unasked question. "I'll be in my lab. I'll start scanning this new anomaly as well."

"Good. This scenario is changing faster than we can anticipate. We need intelligence quickly."

Washu smirked.

"So, you _don't _want me to contact Ryoko?"

OOOoooOOO

Ryoko suddenly hunched over as a huge sneeze wracked her body. Before she could even recover, Ryouga was instantly beside her, shushing her furiously.

"Have you _ever _been hunting before?" he whispered harshly.

From his perch on Ryouga's shoulder, Brain nodded. "All of the subjects possess acute hearing. We must proceed cautiously."

From even further away, Ranma glared at everyone. "Why doesn't _everyone _shut up, then? _I'm _the one stuck with the mutant on a leash." He emphasized his point by pulling on the leash in his hand, the other end being attached to a frantically sniffing mutant mouse, happily dubbed Subject Number Five.

"Shhh!" Ryouga shushed everyone equally. Thankfully Bulma had agreed to be left behind, since there was no way that he was going to let such a small child anywhere _near _the beast they had fought, no matter how well they were equ-

"_Wait, there_!" he whispered as loudly as he dared. When everyone looked his way, he quickly pointed to the distance. Roughly forty meters ahead of Ranma, there was a rustling in the underbrush. Instantly, everyone stopped moving, and lowered themselves down into crouches. It was just as likely to be a rabbit as a mutant rat (which was a rather disturbing thought, now that he thought about it), but he wasn't about to take a chance.

Slowly, Ryouga raised his tranquilizer rifle up to his shoulder, Ryoko mirroring him movements. Both of them trained their sights on the rustling bush, just waiting for something to come through . . .

They didn't have to wait long. After only a few minutes, the bushes parted to reveal . . . a normal mutant rat (another disturbing thought). Ryouga looked quickly to Ryoko over the barrel of his gun, and she looked back, the expression of confusion on her face likely mirrored by his own.

Ryoko leaned over to him, somehow managing to combine the usually distinct acts of whispering and yelling into one definitive statement. "That _isn't _what we fought!"

Ryouga could only nod mutely.

"But it _is _Subject Number Nine," Brain exclaimed quietly. "Even without Subject Five tracking its scent, I would still recognize my own work." He turned to regard the two humans. "If you truly believe this is the monster you seek, then it is imperative that you capture it so that I might determine what could have caused such a radical mutation, and then reversed it."

Ryouga nodded, raising the gun to his shoulder again. "Alright, Doc, if you say so . . ."

With as much care as he could (as he'd never actually fired a gun before), he did his best to draw the distant rodent to the center of his crosshairs. After lining up his shot for nearly a full minute, he was finally confidant that he had it where he wanted it, and he _slowly _began to pull back on the trig-

Ryoko's cell phone _screamed _to life, singing some god awful pop song that he could only imagine she chose just to annoy the people around her. So shocked by the unexpected sound was he, that Ryouga jerked sharply to the side and pulled the trigger, lodging his tranq dart uselessly into the bark of a nearby tree. In the distance, the rodent, spooked by the grating music, disappeared back into the underbrush in a blur of white.

Ryoko, ignoring the heated glares being shot her way, pulled out her phone and flipped it open irately.

"_What_?"

"You are to report to the Sheriff's premises, immediately."

A low growl reverberated oddly in the attractive Deputy's throat. "Damnit, Ikari! We almost had the damned rat!"

"Is the experiment an immediate threat to any civilians?"

Thrown off by the unexpected, and unflappable, response, Ryoko's fury faltered. "Umm, as is, it ain't really a threat to anyone, really . . ."

"Then this takes priority. Dr. Brain is with you, correct?"

Ryoko looked around, confused. "Yeah, H-how'd you kno-"

"Have him remain. I am sending Sergeant Sagura to take over. You. Dr. Saotome and Mr. Hibiki are to make your way to the Sheriff's premises immediately."

The order was immediately followed by the sublime sound of dial tone.

Another growl escaped the demoness' lips as she snapped the phone shut and stuffed the offending thing back into her pocket. She spun back to her three male companions.

"I _hate _it when that bastard does that!" Ryoko then turned her attention to Dr. Brain specifically. "Well, you're on your own, Brain. Me, Ryouga and Lady Fingers gotta head out."

Ryouga looked at the Deputy with a helplessly perplexed gaze. "But what could be more important than catching an escaped mutant?"

Ranma shrugged, an intrigued look spreading across his face.

"Guess we're gonna find out!"

OOOoooOOO

Now, as a genius idea, I'll put the Crossover list at the end, rather than the beginning. (Why I didn't think of that myself, I have no idea. See, that's why I need you guys reading me, to remind me what common sense is.)

Cross/Cameo/I don't own them counter.

**Chapter 1 **

Ranma 1/2

Eureka

The Road To Cydonia

Dragon Ball Z

Chobits / Naruto

Project A-ko

Tenchi

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Cooking Master Boy

Yu Yu Hakusho

Bleach

**Chapter 2**

Kim Possible

Venture Brothers

Knight Sabers

Robotech

Naruto

**Chapter 3**

All Purpose Cultural Catgirl Nuku Nuku

Pokemon

Dexter's Lab

Jimmy Newtron

Invader Zim

X-Com

Men in Black

Pinky and the BrainFull Metal Panic


	4. Title meh, whatever

Eureka - Hmmm . . . yeah, chapter names should go here, shouldn't they?

Chapter Four

I know it's been awhile, but I thought I'd go with a good old fashioned rant this time. There was one review I got (anonymously) that I've been itching to reply to. The review, from nightelf, read as such -

_Keep It Simple, Stupid. You've got so many characters from so many different series flying around that it's almost impossible to keep track of what's happening. _

_Try just a Ranma/Eureka crossover. Ranma in Carter's position, Ryouga visiting. As it is, the story's so confusing and convoluted that there really isn't any point to continuing. By just focusing on Ranma and Eureka itself, I think you would have a far more solid story._

I'm not raking this review over the coals because it's a flame or anything, just that there are two things mentioned here that irk me for reasons unexplainable. The first is, that it demonstrates a marked lack of understanding of the Eureka dynamic. Eureka isn't a show about a sheriff saving the day. It's a story about a normal person being stuck in the midst of extra ordinary people, and trying to make a difference. I didn't write this story as a mega cross because it seemed like a funny idea at the time, I did it because a crossover of this nature _demanded _it. Think of it, if I wrote this story with Ranma as the Sheriff and Ryouga visiting, and those as the only anime characters that people know (Because heaven forbid I would want to confuse anyone), just think of the alternative. I would have had to have written an entire story that had Ranma and Ryouga surrounded by literally dozens of (shudders) _Original Characters_. Now you tell me, how would that have possibly been better? As it is, there are a large number of characters in this story that are vaguely, or obviously familiar, that when you, the readers, learn about them can go 'hey, cool, I know them', or, 'Hmm, wonder who that is'. If I had written this story as nightelf wanted, every other paragraph would have consisted of 'Random scientist person that no one cares about shows up for something'. I would have had to introduce, flesh out and characterize dozens of people that not even I would have cared about terribly much. It would have been a waste, pure and simple, to _not _utilize all of those colorful mad scientists out there already, just waiting for a chance to shine.

Does this make the story confusing? Heck, probably, but I don't see how it's any more confusing than sticking Ryouga and Ranma in amidst a flood of original characters that people didn't know anything about at all. It's just the nature of the beast, I suppose. But hey, that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. If even a few people can follow this little thread of plot I've woven through over thirty series at this point, then I think I've done my job. I know mega crosses aren't popular, and the fact that people are actually enjoying this story then it's all been worth it.

The second point, however, is completely different. 'Just have Ranma in Carter's position and Ryouga visiting'? 'Just focusing on Ranma and Eureka'? I don't know if it's just me, but all I can hear here (heehee) is 'I really wish this story centered around Ranma'. Now, I know that more people like Ranma than Ryouga, and that's just the way it is. I suppose if I wanted to write a story purely for reviews and feedback, I could churn out some schlock Ranma/Akane story, but I'm here to write stories that _I'd _like to read. The fact that other people seem to enjoy them is just a bonus. There are plenty of Ranma centered stories out there (heck, I wrote one), but this ain't one of them.

Well, I suppose I could rant on for some time on this, but that isn't why you're here, so enough is enough.

Enjoy if you will, Tolerate if you won't

OOOoooOOO

Ranma couldn't help but let out a low whistle.

"Okay, now I admit _that _is way stranger than a giant rat."

The trio of ridiculously powerful warriors stared in disbelief at the sheriff's house before them. Well, not so much the house itself . . . as the massive crystalline tower that had risen up from the earth to encompass the entire structure. The translucent crystal spire rose nearly fifty feet into the air and was easily wide enough to swallow up Hercule's house whole. Oddly, though, they could see the building was completely intact, like an insect stuck in amber.

To his right, Ryouga looked on, equally impressed. "So, you're sure that Hercule is in there?" Ranma didn't bother answering, as the question was obviously directed to Gendo, who was standing to the right of the fanged boy.

The government liaison nodded before leading them around the corner of the house. On this side, the crystal cocoon only extended two feet from the wall, so it gave them the best look of Hercule's dwelling Several yards down, standing before one of the building's windows, was a young woman, looking several years younger than Ranma himself. There was a large stack of scanning equipment piled up next to her and she appeared to be directing it towards the crystal spire.

The pigtailed researcher was pretty sure he recognized the blonde scientist, though the lab coat she was wearing didn't narrow it down in the slightest. _Now what was her name again . . . met her at the autumn mixer . . . R- . . . Ak . . ._

"Dr. Akagi," Gendo stated dryly.

Ranma snapped his fingers. _Ah hah! I thought so!_

The blonde researcher started at the sound of Gendo's unexpected greeting and spun to greet him. "Ah, Agent Ikari."

The Saotome Heir waved casually to his fellow researcher. "Hey, Dr. Akagi, how are things going?"

The blonde . . . what was her _first _name again? He could have sworn he'd spoken her at that get together. He definitely knew about her work – _Ritsuko! That was it_!

Ritsuko smiled weakly in reply. "Not well at all I'm afraid, Dr. Saotome."

Hey, she remembered who he was, too. Cool.

Ritsuko then looked past him and offered a consoling look to Ryoko. "Deputy Ryoko, I don't know what to tell you." The doctor calmly pointed through the window she was set up in front of. Looking through the window, they could all easily make out the form of Hercule sitting on his bed, entombed helplessly in the crystal. Ritsuko shook her head in consternation. "We simply don't have enough information to even begin theorizing how to free the Sheriff."

Ryoko shrugged absently, before looking around quickly at her companions. "Oh – _yeah_, yeah, I'm really broken up about this. Please do everything you can to save him . . . really." The deadpan tone of Ryoko's voice did little to convince Ranma of her veracity.

That was hardly his problem though. Fascinated by the frozen form of the Sheriff trapped in the crystal, Ranma walked up to join Dr. Akagi. One he reached the young woman's side, he began to study the structure appraisingly.

"Any idea what this is?"

She simply shook her head. "It _looks _like simple crystal, but it doesn't react like it at all. The tensile strength is greater than quartz and _none _of our scans are able to determine its composition."

Ranma rubbed his chin in contemplation. "Extraterrestrial material, ya think?"

Ritsuko shrugged. "Possibly. It's not that our equipment can't interpret the data, we just aren't _receiving _any."

His fellow researcher gestured to the numerous monitors that dotted the pile of technological scrap to her side. None of the monitors were showing any information at all.

"Hmm, that is pretty weird," he admitted. "Here, let me see if I can see what this thing is."

Behind him, Ryouga snorted derisively. "What? Did you learn the Byakugan as well?"

Ranma shot a glare over his shoulder. "Don't be stupid, Ryouga." He then turned back to the crystal. "That's a _bloodline _trait."

That foolishness out of the way, he held up his hand and gingerly pressed it up against the surface of the crystal.

Ritsuko looked at him oddly. "What exactly is it that you're doing?"

The pigtailed researcher sneered at Ryouga out of the corner of his eye. "I'm tryin' to see if it's a _psionic _construct. Think of it like a passive scan. If I can change the frequency of my aura to match the power of the crystal, it will create a resonance that I'll be able to detect."

He noticed his rival's eyes widen. "You can't possibly have that kind of control over your aura!"

Ranma smirked proudly. "Maybe _you _can't, but _I do_." He then set back to work. "Course, it'll probably take a few minutes."

Concentrating on his hand, he began to alter the frequency of his aura. Of course, it wasn't nearly as simple as just twisting a dial. It was more like trying to sing up a scale, modulating your voice as you went. He started with a baritone, so to speak . . .

He wasn't so busy concentrating, though, that he didn't notice Dr. Akagi sidle up next to him.

"So, Dr. Saotome, I've been keeping up on your research. I must say, some of your theories are quite fascinating."

Ranma turned to face her, enjoying the praise quite a bit. "Hey, thanks, Dr. Akagi! I know I got a lot of pots to watch, as it were, but I really think I'm making some good progress in a few areas."

Ritsuko nodded, smiling evenly. "Indeed. I was particularly impressed with your work on the use of psionics to alter and augment the human body. If your work keeps progressing as it has, I'm considering requesting to have you reassigned to the Human Implementation Project."

Ranma's eyes widened.

"Ummm . . . Ranma?" Ryouga muttered from behind him.

Ranma quickly shushed his rival before turning back to his fellow researcher. "Really? That would be _amazing!_ That's, like, one of the most highly funded projects in the entire facility!"

"Ranma?" This time it was Ryoko distracting them. Both Ritsuko and Ranma just ignored the young deputy.

Dr. Akagi smiled widely. "It would also mean a substantial raise in your security clearance. And you'd be working closely with myself."

The pigtailed martial artist felt his smile grow to match hers. "Sounds like the perks just keep getting better, eh?"

"_Ranma_!"

"_Lady Fingers_!"

"_What_?" Ranma spun to shout at his moronic companions-

Only to be stopped painfully short by his arm's desire to remain attached to his shoulder. He quickly spun back in confusion, only to see that a thin layer of the crystal had actually _grown out_ from the surface of the spire to encompass his hand all the way up to the wrist.

His rival wandered up to point at the imprisoned hand. The smile on the fanged boy's lips was purely vindictive.

"That."

Ryoko's sinister chuckling didn't help either.

Ranma pulled forcefully on his hand, but it was held fast. "Oh _crap_!"

He tried to pull again, harder, but his trapped hand didn't budge a millimeter. It was about then, that he noticed the translucent material wasn't satisfied with just his hand, and was slowly crawling up his forearm. There was only one recourse left.

"_It's eatingmyhand_!" Ranma chose to panic as spectacularly as possible.

Ryoko flew forward excitedly, a sphere of orange energy already forming in her hand.

"I'll blast it off!"

"_What_, my _hand_?"

To Ranma's eternal relief, his rival stepped in at the last second to stop the power-mad deputy.

"No, it's too dangerous—"

"_Thank you_!"

"- _I'll _do it!"

"You son of a –"

"_Bakusai Tenketsu_!"

Ryouga's hand flashed out, quickly tapping the crystal as gently as could be. Ranma knew what was coming, so he was prepared when small cracks began to run through the crystal, before it shattered apart completely. What he _wasn't _prepared for was Ryouga then grabbing his arm and forcefully dragging him a full yard from the site of the explosion.

Then, before he had the chance to yell at Ryouga for doing so, Ranma noticed just _why _his rival had done it. Even as the section of crystal exploded, he could actually see the chunks glimmer with absorbed power before they began _growing_ and _fusing _back together faster than they were flying apart. When all was said and done, the small crystal outgrowth that had flowed out over Ranma's hand now completely encompassed the entire sensor suite that Ritsuko had been using to scan the spire.

Everyone present simply stared at the outhouse-sized addition to the side of the spire.

"I-it absorbed the energy of your attack . . ." Ranma mumbled silently.

"And converted it directly into mass . . ." added Ritsuko.

A low growl rumbled in Ryouga's throat. "Just like the _rat_."

At which point, Agent Ikari walked up to rejoin them.

"A most unexpected development." He then turned to Ranma. "Were you able to determine anything?"

The pigtailed researcher shook his head. "No. It ain't psionic in nature, at least. My bet is still on it bein some alien gizmo."

Gendo turned to the blonde doctor to his side. She simply shrugged in reply. "I don't have anything to prove or disprove that theory."

Apparently satisfied with the answers, the government agent nodded. "Very well. Deputy Ryoko, I want you and Mr. Hibiki to cordon off the area. Dr. Saotome, if you would go with Dr. Akagi, I would like the two of you to see if you can locate any other such structures appearing within the GeoFront."

They all nodded agreeably. Even by Ranma's standards, this wasn't the time for attitude.

Gendo then turned to leave, a serious expression on his face.

"It appears that I have something to discuss with Washu."

OOOoooOOO

Gendo glared at Washu over his folded hands.

"No, I am _not _over reacting. We need to appoint a new Sheriff immediately."

The pair of females that stood on the far side of his desk stared at him. Yui, at the very least looked supportive, however, Washu dismissed his concern with a careless wave of her hand. "Why bother? Ryoko has been doing fine on her own so far. Why get so worked up just because we found Hercule frozen in a block of crystal?"

The Liaison frowned. "Because, up to this point, Hercule was simply MIA. However, now that we have confirmed that he is incapacitated, we need to find a replacement." His eyes narrowed as he stared pointedly at the redheaded scientist. "_You _of all people know why it is necessary."

The self-proclaimed genius grumbled darkly, but surprisingly kept her peace.

To her side, Yui nodded in agreement, only to begin tapping her chin in thought. "What about Sergeant Sagura, or that nice Kim Possible girl? Both of them are highly qualified."

Gendo shook his head slowly. "Unfortunately, Sergeant Sagura is only on loan to us from Mithril. That, and while I appreciate his discipline, I strongly believe that his personality would make him . . . unsuitable for the role. And while Miss Possible would be an excellent candidate, the fact is that she is currently half way across the Pacific at the moment."

Yui made a small 'Ahhhh' sound.

Washu grunted derisively. "Then it's obvious. Just promote Ryoko to Sheriff and get it over with. She was doing all the heavy lifting for Hercule as it was."

Both Gendo and Yui could only stare at the irate genius.

"Absolutely out of the question," Gendo stated with finality.

"What? But why? She's easily powerful enough to keep things under wraps here."

Gendo shook his head. "Power is hardly the point. Ryoko's actions and attitude have been increasingly erratic over the past several months."

Washu took a quick step forward. "That's _not _her fault! Can you imagine how hard it must be for her to watch from the sidelines as Tenchi keeps moving closer to Jurai and further away from her? Can you imagine what _you _would do if you lost the only person you ever loved?"

Despite his desperate attempt to avoid it, his eyes slid briefly to Yui. He quickly shook his head, dispelling the yawning gulf that had opened in his gut at just the thought. "Her personal problems are irrelevant to the situation, no matter how they may impact on galactic relations. The fact that she is powerful doesn't outstrip the fact that she is totally unsuited for the position. The Sheriff must be someone the people can trust and work with. Why do you think we brought Hercule in? His reputation alone has stopped more problems than Ryoko's raw power could hope to."

Washu smirked wickedly. "That's only because Ryoko isn't operating at full power. You give her access to all of her gems and we'll see what some washed up fighter's reputation amounts to."

The government liaison arched his eyebrow in disbelief. "You can't possibly be serious. The reason we agreed to limit her to a single gem is the same reason we sent Ryo Ohki on that salvage operation. Which is the same reason we convinced Professor Utonium to send his daughters into separate professions outside of the GeoFront. Which is _also _the same reason we permanently sealed the dragon balls within several secure locations around the planet. This facility is balanced precariously atop a house of cards. We cannot afford to let the power base shift towards any individual or faction, or everything will fall apart."

Yui shot him a suspicious look. "Is this one of those things where you've already made up your mind and just enjoy shooting down our suggestions?"

Again, despite himself, he produced a rather uncharacteristic smirk.

"For a pair of such gifted minds, you really have a problem seeing outside of the box, don't you? There is a perfect candidate wandering aimlessly right before our eyes. He has demonstrated martial abilities approaching those of Hercule's, but has also proved personable enough to gain the trust, or at least assistance from several of our researchers already."

Yui tapped her chin in thought. "Who . . . Oh my! You couldn't possibly mean . . .?"

Washu, on the other hand, scowled darkly. "You'd choose some _vagabond _that just fell off the turnip truck over Ryoko?"

Gendo continued to smirk. "Given the options, I would choose _Kagato _to be our Sheriff before Ryoko."

His lovely wife giggled. "Well, Mr. Hibiki _is _a little handsome. I suppose having him around wouldn't be too bad for office morale."

"Yui . . ." He let out a resigned sigh.

"Wait a second! Won't putting Saotome's friend in such an integral position just shift the power base in _his _direction?" asked an annoyed Washu.

The Liaison rolled his eyes. "Saotome, even including Dr. Tofu, does not _have _a power base. And while Hibiki's familiarity with Saotome may influence his decision to assist us, the police files I have read from several years back show that he is anything but beholden to Saotome. Besides, it is only a temporary solution until Hercule is revived, no more and no less."

While the universe's greatest genius did not look happy about the decision, she must have been able to see the small glimmer of logic it possessed. She gave a non-committal grunt of agreement, which was honestly more than he had hoped for.

Yui smiled impishly. "I hope you know what you're doing, dear."

He returned her smile with a strained smile. "Do I ever?"

He then hit the intercom on his desk with deft sureness. "Nuku Nuku, contact the deputy, Mr. Hibiki and Dr. Saotome. Please have them report to my office immediately."

OOOoooOOO

Ryouga took three more steps before casually ramming another metal post a good foot into the earth. A moment later, Ryoko floated over and absently wrapped the bright yellow roll of police tape around the post several times, continuing to form the impenetrable barrier around the crystal spire which had devoured the Sheriff's house. From the look of it, they were almost half done; at the rate they were going, another twenty minutes, tops.

Not wanting to spend that much time in silence, he turned to his companion and conversationally asked, "So, what do you think happened to Hercule?"

Oddly, his lovely companion groaned in annoyance. "Oh, don't even get me _started._ I've seen this one before. It's the old 'Freeze myself in a giant crystal to dodge out on my responsibilities' trick."

Ryouga's eyes widened at her statement. "You've seen this _before_?"

She waved nonchalantly. "Oh, yeah. My _mom _got herself stuck in a crystal for, like, two thousand years just to avoid raising me. And yet she still has the gall to complain just cuz I _happened _to destroy a few planets."

The fanged martial artist eyed his companion warily. "I . . . guess a positive role model might have helped there . . . Wait a second! You're _two thousand _years old?"

Ryoko gave him a glare that promised heated death. "_Yeah, _what of it?"

"Uh, heh, nothing, just that you . . . don't look a day over twenty is all . . ."

"Ahh, that's so sweet of you."

Which was precisely the moment that the deputy's phone decided to ring. Ryouga let out a small sigh of relief. Saved by the bell and all that junk. Ryoko quickly pulled out the small phone and flipped it up to her ear. Immediately, a small stream of chatter spilled out from the phone, but it was far too quiet for the martial artist to make out.

"_Hey_, Nuku . . ." Ryoko replied a moment later, the marked lack of enthusiasm in her voice was enough that even Ryouga picked up on it.

The tiny voice chattered on for another minute.

"Sure thing, Nuku . . . be right there . . ." The deputy then snapped the phone closed and stuffed it back into her pocket with a huff before turning his way with a look of annoyance on her face.

"Ugh, why do all of these sentient androids think 'all us girls gotta stick together'? It's such _bull_! I swear, between Nuku, Chi and X-J9, I'm getting _sick _of it. I mean, sure, I was _created_, but I'm still a living there, here!"

Ryouga smirked. "Touchy subject?"

She frowned cutely. "You have _no _idea. Anyway, forget that. We gotta head back to GD. C'mon, I'll teleport us."

"You can _do _that?"

"Sh'yeah. Takes a little more effort, but it's no problem."

He was totally unprepared for what happened next, as Ryoko smirked wickedly and moved forward to wrap her arms around his neck. She quickly pulled him tightly against her, crushing her . . . assets to his chest.

"Ready for the wildest ride of your life, Stud?"

Ryouga could already feel his internal blood pressure sky rocketing to dangerous levels, even as the edges of his vision began to fade to black from the sudden, and very intimate, contact - He was unexpectedly saved from complete humiliation at the last second as a thought flashed through his mind. Pinching his nose tightly, he glared balefully at his partner.

"_Wait a second_! If you could do this all along, why did you make Ranma drag me to the facility? Or for that matter, why did you let Ranma drive us to the park, or ignore Washu when she asked you for help? You could have teleported me anywhere you needed instantly!"

Ryoko rolled her eyes at his inquisition. "Pffft. You've known me for this long and you haven't figured it out? I've just been using you as an excuse to get out of doing any _real_ work."

He considered that for a moment. "Hmm . . . now that you mention it . . ."

"Now shaddup. I have to synch up with you."

With that, Ryoko suddenly reached up, placing a hand on each of his cheeks, and proceeded to pull his face down towards her own.

"W-wait, _what_?"

However, just before he could begin to _really _freak out, Ryoko tilted her head down at the last second, touching their foreheads together gently. At the point of contact he felt a light tingle which sobered his panic instantly.

"Oh . . ."

The demoness snickered evilly.

"Sucker."

And then the world just seemed to _shift _around them. It was actually extremely mundane. The scenery of the great outdoors just dissolved away, quickly revealing the familiar interior of Agent Ikari's office. In the blink of an eye, they were where they needed to be with nothing more than a pleasant tingling that suffused his body.

". . . _whoa _. . ."

Their foreheads still touching, Ryoko smirked in a disturbingly non-evil fashion. "Yeah, I have that effect on guys."

The moment was quickly interrupted by a loud cough coming from the general direction of Gendo's large desk. Instantly, Ryouga leapt back from the deputy; he could already feel his face flaring red. It was quite obvious that the two of them were _not _alone in the office, judging by the amused trio of people currently watching them. Dr. Ikari, Agent Ikari and Washu all wore strange little smiles on their faces.

"I hope weren't interrupting anything," offered Gendo.

Ryouga was about to protest, loudly and vehemently, that they had _not_, when Washu suddenly strode forward, a serious expression on her face. "Tell me, Mr. Hibiki, what exactly are your intentions towards my daughter?"

At that, the redheaded genius began to examine him like he was a prize entrant at a dog show. The combination of embarrassment and discomfort had the fanged fighter stuttering helplessly. "I-intentions? I-I-I don't have _any _intentions!"

Washu pouted adorably in reply. "Awww, that's too bad. You look like you could keep Ryoko up _all _night with that toned little body of yours."

The Lost Boy desired, more than anything at that moment, then to live up to his namesake. Instantly, his face began to burn red and he quickly pinched his nose before it could explode into a crimson fountain.

"_Mo-om_! You damn well know I was just synching with him for the teleport!"

The pint sized genius giggled mischievously. "I know! But _he _didn't know that I knew that."

"Wait, what?" asked the confused martial artist.

She giggled again. "Oh, don't look so serious. You're _much _cuter when you're all flustered."

Ryouga glared daggers at the young looking woman before turned to Ryoko.

"I think I'm starting to see why you got that restraining order in your contract."

The cyan haired deputy laughed in amusement. "_Tell _me about it!"

Washu pouted sadly. "Oh! You two are _meanies_!"

Thankfully, they were again saved from further embarrassment as the office door swung open. A moment later, Ranma strolled into the room, greeting everyone present with a jaunty wave.

"Yo."

Behind his desk, Agent Ikari offered a small smile. "Dr. Saotome, excellent. We can finally begin."

Ryoko turned to face the desk bound man. "So, what's going on then, Agent Ikari?"

In response, Gendo folded his hands before his mouth. "A piece of official business to begin with. I hate to be so abrupt, but time is _not _on our side. We need to appoint a new Sheriff before we can continue."

Immediately, Ryouga and Ranma both turned to Ryoko. The former smiled widely. "Congratulations, Ryoko!"

Ranma, for his part, wore an extremely dubious look on his face. Ryoko, for _her_ part, suddenly began hemming and hawing reluctantly. "Um . . . ah . . . about that . . ."

"Mr. Hibiki, we would appreciate it if _you _would take up the position."

Needless to say, that had _not _been where Ryouga had seen the conversation going. Even as he felt his own jaw drop in shock, he heard the cyan haired deputy to his side let out a sigh of relief. There was only one thing he could think to do at the moment.

Pointing pointedly to himself – "What? _Me_? What about Ryoko? Why not her?"

Ryoko shot him a sidelong glance which spoke volumes. The look also prompted him to think the situation over for a second.

"Ohhh, _riiiight,_ the general disdain for humanity you flaunt on a daily basis."

The ruthless space pirate nodded in reply, a giddy smile on her lips.

"Exactly," Gendo agreed, "Now, this would only be until Hercule is restored, and we only ask this of you due to the severity of the situation."

Rubbing his chin in consideration, Ranma nodded as well. "Meh, you could do worse. S'not like ya got a lot of options, considering none of us researchers are allowed to interfere in these cases directly."

At that, Ryouga put his hands up before him to shut everyone up. "Whoa whoa, _whoa_; hold on just a minute. People keep saying that. What the heck does it mean? Why _can't _researchers get involved in these kinds of situations? Who _else _is supposed to fix this mess? And what the heck does me being Sheriff have to do with _anything_?"

Gendo met his hectic glare with an impassive stare. "All very good questions, Mr. Hibiki, and all related, actually."

Ranma scratched his head, looking a little confused too. "Y'know, now that you mention it, _I'm _not really sure why that rule is there, either . . ."

Off to the side of the room, a certain red haired, intergalactic genius began to chuckle in a very nervous sounding manner. "Heh . . . heh, well, the _why _isn't really important. We should really be focusing on solving the problem at hand-"

"_Oh, no_!" Ryoko's outburst cut off her mother's words with excited aplomb. "This is _way _too rich to pass up. If you won't tell 'em, then _I _sure as hell will."

Washu looked very much like she wanted to say something, or, more to the point, _stop her daughter_ from saying something, but with great reluctance, remained silent. Taking the silence as consent, Ryoko turned back to the pair of martial artist's, a truly delighted smile on her face.

"Oh, man, you guys are gonna _love _this. Y'see, just a little over a year before Lady Fingers here joined up-"

"Hey!"

"-One of our egg heads, some Von Doom joker, gets it into his head to make an army of unstoppable killing machines to take over the world."

On the far side of the desk, Agent Ikari slowly lowered his face into his hands. "You have _no _idea how difficult it is to keep track of projects when _everyone _is a genius fully capable of hacking and rewriting our systems on a whim," moaned the government liaison.

Ryoko smirked. "Heh, poor baby. Anyway, as soon as this army starts tearing up the GeoFront to get to the surface, Dr. Stingray decided to play the hero and unleashed a pack of his experimental cybernetic creatures . . . what did he call them again?"

"Boomers, I believe," supplied a resigned Washu.

"That's it! Heh, well, in like, five second, the boomers go berserk and start making an even worse mess than the robots," Ryoko continued excitedly.

Ryouga shared an uncertain look with his long time rival. "Sheesh," they agreed unanimously.

Only to be shushed by an ominously cheerful Ryoko. "Oh, no, this is where things start getting _good_. Y'see, Dr. Gero, apparently under the impression that there were two people trying to take over the world _before _him, unleashes a small squad of androids-"

"Numbers Two through Six, if I recall," added a defeated Gendo.

"And with _their _firepower, the fight actually breached the GeoFront and spilled out onto the surface. Of course, by this point, half the scientists in this loony bin decide the fate of the world rested squarely on _their _brilliant scientific minds, so in bids to save, enslave, or just plain try out their latest toys, these _geniuses _all unleashed their own ill conceived armies."

Washu smiled fondly at some distant memory. "Professor Membrane's bio-engineered army of killer mutant piggies were my favorites; so _playful_."

Ryouga shuddered violently - the horror . . . _the horror_!

Before his imagination could run wild, unleashing his darkest P-Chan centered nightmares, Ryoko was kind enough to cackle malevolently. Obviously her story wasn't done yet. "Ah, but I saved the best for last. You see, then, in her _absolute wisdom_, Mom over there, decides to set loose this swarm of robots she found out in space centuries ago, just to see what they would do. What did you call them again, Mom?"

Washu let out a defeated sigh. ". . . Replicators . . ."

Ryoko nodded ecstatically. "Yeah, and that was when things got _really _bad."

Ryouga gawked. "And things were _okay _up to that point?"

By that point of the conversation, Gendo's head was buried beneath his hands, and Washu already had one foot into a conveniently conjured portal to another dimension.

Ryoko just continued to laugh mockingly. "Oh, you _had _to be there. Japan wasn't even close to big enough to hold in the little baby Armageddon we set off. The fight spilled over into China, Korea, India, Australia and beyond! Hell, when all was said and done, heroes and organizations from all four corners of the _planet _showed up to clean up the mess. I'm talking: Tenchi, the Avengers, the Power Puff Girls; heck, even those lame ass Power Rangers made the stage. It was such an incredible fubar that GD had to give the MIB access to the lunar mirror array to send up a pulse big enough to neuralize half the planet."

Okay, enough was enough. Ryouga frantically waved his hand in the air to draw their lecturer's attention. "Okay, that's enough, Ryoko. You had me going there for a bit, but I'm pretty sure I would _remember _the Automaton Apocalypse."

Only the amber eyed deputy rolled her eyes in annoyance. "Doy! You were neuralized."

_Ummmm . . ._ Ryouga tapped a finger to his chin for a moment. "_Neuralized_ . . . is that a word I should know?"

Washu raised a finger . . . only to slowly lower it again. "It isn't, actually . . . Suffice it to say, though, that _no one _on the surface remembers that event."

Apparently feeling safe enough to leave the safety of his hands, Gendo nodded in agreement. "It is the seventh largest global cover up in human history, I believe."

At that, Ryouga shot his rival another confused glance, but Ranma only replied with a helpless shrug.

"To get to the point." Gendo fired a disapproving frown in the deputy's direction. "It was immediately declared by _several _governments that _no_ Global Dynamics researchers operating within the Japanese Branch could ever intervene in _any _kind of emergency without the express permission of a neutral third party."

"Ahhhh," Ranma 'ahhh'd', "So that's where Ryouga comes in."

Gendo nodded. "Precisely." He then turned his attention back to Ryouga. "Though your title would be Sheriff, that position is merely ornamental-"

"Actually, we stole the idea for having a Sheriff from the American Division, we just had to modify it to suit our needs," added a (disturbingly) cheerful Washu.

The Government Liaison leveled a flat glare at the unwelcome assistance before continuing. "Acting as a law enforcement agent is purely a secondary duty. Your primary responsibility would be better described as 'Resource Allocation'. As an individual not officially employed by Global Dynamics, you decide _who _can assist you in any given situation and to what extent. As such, you act as a . . ."

"A faucet?" suggested an equally disturbingly cheerful Ryoko.

Again, the Gendo directed an annoyed glare in the Space Pirate's direction, only to release a resigned sigh a moment later. "Yes, Ryoko, as a faucet." He then turned his attention back to Ryouga, _again_. "You will have the full support of Global Dynamics, without being a _part _of Global Dynamics. All of our researchers and resources can only be brought to bear if you deem it necessary. Thus, without your authorization, no overzealous individuals can overstep their boundaries . . . again."

To say that Ryouga was staring at the Agent in stark raving disbelief would have been a grave case of understatement. "Y-you're _joking, _right? You mean you want to rest the fate of the world on _my _decisions? Don't you think that's just a _little _much responsibility to just thrust on some random guy that happens to wander through town?"

Apparently Gendo wasn't joking, though, despite the complete insanity of what he was saying. Instead, the Agent shook his head. "I think you are overestimating the situation. This facility is not a world saving organization. We are a research facility, through and through. Though there are incredibly powerful individuals in our employ, there are other groups and organizations far more geared towards, and capable of, protecting the planet. The only situations we involve ourselves in are those which directly affect us, or . . . or those which we instigate ourselves."

Washu smirked shamelessly. "Odds have been about ninety to one favoring the latter."

Gendo groaned loudly at the obviously completely factual statement.

Ryouga, on the other hand, let out a sigh of relief. "Well, that doesn't sound nearly as bad, but still, doesn't that mean you're relying on me to solve the current crisis?"

Something he said must have been amusing, as the relatively sour Gendo was smiling once more. "Again you misunderstand the situation. Because of the severity of the current scenario, we are appointing you Sheriff _solely _to rubber stamp any and all efforts we deign to employ in the solving of this crisis."

_Oh . . . _"Oh . . . well, I can do _that_."

"Excellent." Agent Ikari then immediately turned to Washu. "Professor Hakubi-"

Only to stop short as the diminutive scientist shot him a look that even had Ryouga's toes curling in apprehension.

Gendo sighed in defeat. ". . . _Lil _Washu . . ."

Washu's scowl turned into a beaming smile like magic (so much in that any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from it)

"Could you please appraise us of your findings thus far?" Ikari asked coolly.

"I'd be delighted to, _Agent Ikari_." The pink haired scientist quickly summoned up the strange holographic keyboard that Ryouga had seen her use back in the Sheriff's office, only this time a large, three dimensional cube appeared above the keyboard, floating above the heads of all those present in the room. At the moment, all six sides of the cube were a dull, matte black.

"As you know, there are currently three events occurring that are under investigation: The escaped experiment, the seismic activity, and just recently, the large crystal protrusion which has encapsulated the Sheriff. All seemingly unrelated. _However_, thanks to my _staggeringly _brilliant mind, I have been able to determine that all three of these events are, in fact, directly interconnected!"

Ranma rolled his eyes. "Um – duh! We figured that out a half an hour ago-"

It was the pigtailed researcher's turn to stop abruptly as Washu's glare turned his way. A second later, Saotome was safely perched behind Ryouga's back. Ryouga winced a bit, as well, as Washu glared straight through him for a moment before clearing her throat loudly. With several deft touches to the keyboard before her, all six sides of the formerly featureless black cube came to life, each one showing a different view of Hercule's house.

"I will admit that I had been struggling with the unexplained seismic activity for hours now, however, the appearance of this latest aberration provided the last clue I needed to solve the mystery."

Several more touches of her keyboard, and suddenly three of the six sides of the cube went back to flat black. However, in the bottom corner of each of the black sides was a different word. In the one was 'Infrared', in the second was 'Ultraviolet', and the script in the third screen was some bizarre script that Ryouga had never seen before.

"The images you are seeing are the same shots of Hercule's house that were just on the screen, as seen through various spectrums. As you can see, whatever this crystal substance is, it doesn't register on any kind of scan. Not only that, but-"

"It's actually absorbing the energy and converting it to mass," interrupted a very bored sounding Ryoko. "_Doy_, Mom! We figured that out _yesterday_!"

The scowl on Washu's face looked like it could have melted steel.

"A pack of smart alecs, eh? Well did you know about _this_, then?"

The head scientist angrily punched another series of non-existent keys on her interface. Instantly, the holographic cube vanished, replaced by a large sphere which filled up most of the room above their heads. Displayed in the sphere was a (perfectly) accurate schematic of the entire GeoFront, from cavern wall to cavern wall, encompassing the GD facility, the town . . .

And the massive gulf of emptiness which currently resided little more than one hundred meters below the town.

Ryouga's eyes widened at the stomach churning sight. "Ahhh . . . _I _didn't know that . . ."

Instantly, Washu's dark scowl was gone and she beamed a giddy smile in Ryouga's direction, before sticking her tongue out petulantly at Ryoko and Ranma.

"That's _right_! At first I thought the seismic activity was being caused due to the instability that a cavern like this would create. However, it is quite the opposite. I theorize that this entire cavern is _filled _with the same crystal which is encompassing Hercule's house. Not only that, but that the crystal around Hercule's house is actually an _off-shoot _of the main mass . . . and if that isn't a clear sign that the crystal mass is growing, I don't know what is."

Gendo nodded in agreement. "It not only explains the seismic activity, but also why the entire GeoFront hasn't collapsed into the earth . . . further into the earth. So, what is it, then?"

Washu shrugged. "I have no idea."

Were the world a slightly sillier place, Ryouga was certain he would have performed a perfect face plant at the deadpan delivery of the supposed 'Greatest Genius in the Universe's' declaration. As it was, he handled the news better than some.

"You don't _know_?" barked an incredulous Ryoko. "But you know _everything_!"

The Head Researcher rolled her eyes. "Hardly. Sure, I know more than everyone in the universe combined, but that doesn't mean that there aren't things that science can't explain. Heck, your gems fall into _that _category."

Apparently uninterested in the family squabble, Ranma shrugged as well. "Whatever. So, what do we _do _about it?"

The disturbingly eager smile that spread across Washu's face was far from heartening. "Weelllll, we could always just shift the entire mass into a different dimension."

Gendo frowned, as if he was actually considering the insane suggestion. "That could cause the entire town to collapse."

Washu shrugged absently. "Meh, then shift the _town _into a different dimension."

"Is that your answer for _everything_?" inquired an increasingly irate deputy.

Ryouga had to agree, shaking his head in disbelief. "Do we have any ideas that _don't _involve shifting significant portions of the earth into a different dimension?"

Everyone looked to Washu, who looked to Gendo, who looked to Ryoko, who looked to Ranma . . . who shrugged helplessly. "What the heck ya all lookin' at me for? This ain't _my _field of expertise."

Ryouga sighed sadly. The pigtailed researcher had a point; too bad they didn't actually _have _an expert in the field of weird . . . crystals . . .

Hmmmm . . . a thought.

"You know, according to your odds, there's about a ninety to one chance that this is someone's experiment gone awry, right? So whose is it?"

Ranma 'ahh'd' in understanding. "Not a bad idea. It would definitely help if we actually knew what this stuff was."

The wanderer shrugged. "Well, it couldn't hurt. I mean, it worked with Brain, right? So why not this?"

Agent Ikari nodded. "A good idea. However, I have already gone through the entire audit, already conveniently done due to the mutant incident. It appears that we have yet another unauthorized, and thus untraceable, experiment on our hands."

"Well, that doesn't narrow things down at all," Ryoko grumbled mostly to herself.

Ryouga mulled the idea over a little more. "Hmmm, so, what usually happens when a researcher screws up this bad? Do they usually report it, or make a run for it?"

Gendo donned a serious expression for a moment, before deflating visibly.

"They usually run, or strive to cover up their errors." The man quickly tapped a few buttons on the computer sitting on his desk, only to sigh again. "Another good guess, but I have no reports of any missing persons. Considering the size of the crystal mass, I can only imagine that if the instigator meant to flee, they would have done so some time ago."

Suspiciously, at the back of the room, Washu began whistling innocently, thusly declaring her guilt for the entire room to hear. Everyone turned to stare pointedly at the young appearing scientist.

"Heh . . . ummm, well, that's not quite one hundred percent accurate . . ."

Incrementally deepening lines carved a darkening frown on Gendo's face. Still maintaining an even stare, the Liaison asked quietly, "My timeline?"

Washu began fidgeting even more nervously, digging her toe into the hard floor. "Ahhh, more your statement that there aren't any missing persons . . ."

The darkening frown he had been wearing was approaching dangerous levels as the man continued to level an arctic stare at the Head Researcher.

"Washu . . ."

"You have to understand that this is a unique situation, and that I'm not even sure she _is _missing. And there's no evidence linking her to this event, so at best, this is all conjecture," blurted Washu in an increasingly rapid pace.

In a very impressive display, Agent Ikari managed to maintain his calm composure. "Washu . . . _who _is missing, and for how long?"

"But I just said I wasn't even sure she _was_ missing. I just . . . haven't heard from her for a week . . . or two, _but – but_ there are extenuating circumstances that you may not be aware of concerning this partic-"

"Washu." The name was said with such finality, that it even shut up the immensely intimidating genius. Ryouga had to give Agent Ikari credit, the man could be _scary _when he really needed to.

After a moment of indecision, Washu finally sighed in defeat.

"Dr. Ami Mizuno is missing."

Ryouga gasped. "Wait a second! This lady has been missing for over a _week_ and you didn't think to mention it?"

"Like I said," explained an increasingly flighty Washu, "There are _extenuating _circumstances. Besides, I did, kind of, sort of mention it . . . to Ryoko and you . . ."

Ryoko snapped her fingers in understanding. "That favor you wanted from Hercule! Mom, if it was that important, why didn't you just _tell _me?"

The diminutive genius tapped her fingers together in an adorably embarrassed matter. "Well, I thought a small amount of discretion was called for, and Hercule owed me a small favor."

Gendo's even stare took on a suspicious glint. "And why _exactly _did you feel such discretion was required concerning this _unique situation_?"

"Well, I thought it would be better for everyone if this was kept quiet. You see, the reason that I didn't report her as missing is because this isn't the first time she's vanished for an extended period of time . . . Dr. Mizuno . . . well, she lives an . . . an alternative life style, if you know what I mean."

Ryouga, Ranma and Ryoko all 'Ahhh'd' in understanding.

Then Ranma suddenly grumbled darkly. "Hey! Wait just a second! Yer sayin' you let this Mizuno chick skip off work just cuz she's gay? That's discrimination!"

Flanking the pigtailed warrior, Ryouga and Ryoko both nodded in agreement, arms crossed over their chests.

"Shameful."

"I always wondered about you, Mom."

"_It's not like that_!" shrilled the tiny genius. "She's not gay! . . . Well, actually, she _could _be. I mean, I don't recall ever seeing her bringing any men back to her lab, but that's hardly the point here."

Gendo folded his hands before his mouth in what was becoming a very familiar gesture. "Then what exactly _is _the point?"

Washu held her breath for a moment . . . only to sigh again.

"She's a super hero . . ."

_Wow_. That was neat; Ryouga never thought he'd ever see Agent Ikari's face go quite _that _shade of white. The man seemed incredibly unflappable. Still . . .

"She's a . . ." Recovering his natural pigment just as quickly as he lost it, Gendo's eyes narrowed to razor slits. "Do you have any idea of just how _severe _a breach of protocol it is to have one of our researchers gallivanting around as an _active _vigilante? I don't know about you, but _I _don't relish the idea of surviving the cataclysmic collapse of this GeoFront, just to spend the rest of my natural life in prison for treason."

Washu offered up a pathetically weak smile. "See, that's _exactly _why I didn't tell you. You always see the negative side of things . . ."

Even though his hands were still folded before his mouth, Ryouga could still _feel _the man's frown from across the room.

"How. Long."

Everyone in the entire room shifted around nervously at the tone in his voice.

"Ummm . . . about four years?"

Though it seemed impossible, Gendo's eyes narrowed further. "So, she has been moonlighting for the _entire _duration of the Non Interference Declaration?"

Washu giggled lightly (though it came across as slightly unhinged). "A little longer, actually. Y'see, she first approached me shortly after the . . . Incident, desiring to join. Her only condition was that she could continue to help her friends when they needed her help. It's not _my _fault! How was I to know a bunch of politicians would pass such a ridiculous rule?"

Agent Ikari let out a tired sigh. "Washu-"

"Ummm, excuse me, Old People, but we kinda have a major emergency _here_, don't we?" asked Ranma flatly. The question earned him dark glares from the aforementioned 'Old People', as well as some snickering from Ryoko.

As much as he hated to agree with his rival (especially when he was right), Ryouga nodded. "As rude and inconsiderate and insulting and ignorant and-"

"Get to the point!"

"-Ahem, as Ranma may be, he's right. We need to locate Dr. Mizuno as soon as possible."

A loud groan acted as a preamble to Washu's reply. "What do you _think _I've been doing? I tried calling her cell phone, hacking into the carrier frequency of her communicator network to ask her teammates, running an isometric scan of the entire GeoFront to locate her bioelectrical signature, and even unleashed a swarm of nano-flies triggered to her DNA to locate her."

All around the room, all of the 'Not Greatest Geniuses in the Universe's' shared a quick glance betwixt themselves. In a strange quirk of cooperation, Ranma and Ryoko both prodded Ryouga in the ribs, prompting him to speak up for them. Sighing in defeat, the Lost Boy took a step forward.

"Ummm . . . Did you actually try knocking on her door?"

Washu glared hotly at the impertinent question. "What? I'm the greatest scientific genius in the universe! Do you think I could _possibly_ overlook such an _obvious_ option and just skip ahead to increasingly complicated and intricate plots to discover the location of . . ." A weak sigh. "Okay, you're right, _totally _didn't think of that."

To his side, Ranma smirked wickedly.

"See, Ryouga _is _just what we need here. Ya know what they say, 'Simple minds for simple solutions'!"

"_Raaannnnnmmmmaaaaa_!"

OOOoooOOO

For you people out there, I went easy on the new crosses this time, so hopefully the story didn't get lost in the shuffle here.

Chapter 1

Ranma 1/2

Eureka

The Road To Cydonia

Dragon Ball Z

Chobits

Project A-ko

Tenchi

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Cooking Master Boy

Yu Yu Hakusho

Bleach

Chapter 2

Kim Possible

Venture Brothers

Knight Sabers

Robotech

Naruto

Chapter 3

All Purpose Cultural Catgirl Nuku Nuku

Pokemon

Dexter's Lab

Jimmy Newtron

Invader Zim

X-Com

Men in Black

Pinky and the Brain

Full Metal Panic

Chapter 4

Power Puff Girls

My Life As A Teenage Robot

Marvel Comics

Stargate SG-1

Power Rangers

Sailor Moon (Come on, you really didn't see this coming? It's practically obligatory)


	5. Almost Done

Eureka

Chapter 5

Well, here we are, _almost _done now. Probably for the best, considering you're probably all just as tired of reading this as I am of writing it.

On a completely unrelated note, I just wanted to direct people to my profile. Not because of anything on there, because there isn't. As a few of you probably know, I've been lucky enough to receive some very impressive fanart since I started writing. To give the artists more credit, I've moved all of these pictures to a deviant art account (linked on my profile) in which I can actually thank each artist for their work. Thanks to EternallyLostRyouga, there's also a new piece available to see which I think deserves even more attention than the story I wrote upon which it was based.

Also, I would like the thank Claymade once again for his diligent efforts in making my work suck just that much less. In return, I'm shamelessly plugging his new Naruto story 'A Secret Little Game'. Let me just say, I don't read Naruto fanfics, and have actually gone out of my way to decry them for the most part, so bear that in mind when I say just how _amazing_ this story is.

_If you read one Naruto fanfiction this year, make it 'A Secret Little Game'._

Now, Enjoy if you will, Tolerate if you won't.

OOOoooOOO

The reality of Gendo's office dissolved away to reveal the strangely normal scene of a rather quaint little house resting in the center of a well-manicured lawn. Ryouga shivered lightly as the familiar tingle of teleportation ran through his body. He looked to the young woman whose arms were wrapped around his neck before smiling gently. She returned his smile with a teasing smirk before they both turned to watch as the other half of their little troupe arrived.

Ryouga and Ryoko shared a quick laugh at the sight of Ranma appearing from thin air, Washu clinging tightly to the pigtailed researcher . . . _very tightly _in some regions. The Lost One and the Space Pirate chuckled loudly as they stepped apart; for his part, the Saotome Heir shuddered violently.

"Man, I will _never _gonna get used to that."

Ryouga shrugged, amused. "I don't know, I find it pretty exhilarating."

At his side, Ryoko smiled saucily and raked her fingers through the air.

"_Rrowr_."

Ranma's terrified flinch just set the pair of Ryo's to laughing all over again. Rather than deal with them, though, the pigtailed researcher spun back on Washu. "And did you _have _to have your hand on my butt the whole time?"

Washu smiled broadly. "Nope!"

Which, _again_, set the Sheriff and Deputy into another fit of helpless giggles. Ranma on the other hand, resorted to the only option left to him: going brilliantly red in the face (from anger or embarrassment, Ryouga really couldn't tell . . . or care, for that matter)

Then, in an unusually responsible manner, Ryoko floated across the lush green yard and up to the front door of the blue tinted house. "Okay, you jokers, let's find the lab mouse and get outta here. I doubt you guys wanna get buried alive. _I _on the other hand, wouldn't even be inconvenienced by a few million metric tons of rubble dropping on us."

Ryouga considered that as he wandered up to join her at the door, before shrugging. "Meh, been there, done that."

The Sheriff then politely knocked on the door.

A moment passed.

Ryouga knocked again.

An errant breeze tussled the grass playfully behind them.

Ryouga knocked aga-

"Oh, for crying out loud!"

Ryouga's knuckles fell far short of the door's surface as he was pushed forcefully to the side and Ryoko simply stuck her entire head through the wooden obstruction. The deputy's shoulders shifted from side to side as she apparently examined the interior of the house. A moment later, she phased the rest of the way into the house and vanished from sight.

Ryouga let out a low whistle of appreciation. "You know, for a merciless space pirate, she sure has a lot of really useful abilities for this job."

Washu smiled proudly. "Some of my best work!"

A minute later, Ryoko returned, passing cleanly through the wall several yards to their right. The deputy floated back to join them before shrugging helplessly. "The place is empty, but a few of the lights are on. Dunno if she left in a hurry, or wasn't expecting to be gone for long."

Ranma hummed in consideration. "What about her lab?"

Both Ryouga and Ryoko turned to the pigtailed researcher. "What lab?" they asked in unison. Ranma rolled his eyes. "C'mon, _all _of us have secret, personal labs. I got my dojo, Tofu's got his basement, this Mizuno chick has gotta have one too." He turned to Washu. "You think you can find it?"

The self proclaimed 'Greatest genius in the Universe' scoffed loudly at the very notion of being unable to perform such a simple task, before summoning up her holographic interface before her. With a few simple keystrokes, information flying up the screen faster than Ryouga could ever hope to comprehend, a look of mild interest formed on Washu's petite face.

"Hmmm, interesting. There is what appears to be an elevator shaft descending from a concealed chamber in the basement. However, the shaft only drops down several dozen meters into the ground . . . then nothing."

Ryouga's face scrunched up in thought. "Nothing? You mean she built an elevator that doesn't go anywhere?"

Washu rolled her eyes. "No. _Nothing_, as in I'm not getting any sensor readings at all . . . if you get my drift."

Ryoko's eyes lit up with understanding. "Ahh! I bet that means her entire lab is encased in that crystal, right?"

The fanged warrior spun to look at his pigtailed counterpart, already knowing exactly what his rival was thinking. As one they barked, "Encased in crystal?"

Flowing forward in perfect synchronization, the slippered feet of the martial pair blasted through meager door and they flew through the entrance before the splintering wood or shattered doorframe even had time to hit the ground.

Still floating calmly on the front lawn, Ryoko rolled her eyes and looked down at her mother. "_Men_. I _had _unlocked the door, y'know?"

The tiny genius giggled. "I think it's cute, charging off all half cocked like that."

The space pirate turned deputy could only shake her head as they made their way through the thoroughly ruined doorway and down into the basement. By the time they arrived, the pair of overly energetic humans had already located the hidden elevator shaft and had removed the door in a manner that was likely not recommended by the manufacturers. In fact, judging by the twisted sheets of metal on the floor, it was a good bet that the two boys had seriously voided any kind of warranty that the good doctor might have gotten.

Before Ryoko and Washu could even join them, Ranma turned to Ryouga, wide smirk on his face. "Last one down is a little black piglet!"

The pigtailed researcher then leapt suicidally down the empty elevator shaft. He was followed less than a second later by a yellow and black blur of anger. "_Raaannmmaaa_!"

Ryoko snorted loudly at the display. "Is it just me, or are those two such stereotypical guys that it almost hurts?"

Her mother smiled in amusement. "They certainly _are _fine specimens of the male sex, if that's what you meant."

"It _wasn't._" Ryoko scowled darkly before beginning her own descent into darkness.

Several dozen meters below, the pigtailed researcher touched down lightly, landing on what looked to be the roof of an elevator car, complete with little trap door. A few seconds later, Ryouga landed beside him, scowling darkly.

"Slow as always, eh, P-Chan?"

"Oh, shut up, Ranma. Just you wait until I master that speed technique you taught me!"

"Heh, tell me when ya do, ya might _almost _be a challenge then."

"Why you-"

Ryouga's rant was cut off abruptly as the earth began to literally quake all around them. The pair of martial artists swayed unsteadily as worrying amounts of dust and the odd rivet rained down around them. The fact that they were currently over a hundred feet beneath the ground while this was happening was not lost on the pair.

"Um, back to work?" Ryouga suggested quickly.

Ranma nodded, just a little nervously. "Business before pleasure, and all that."

"Wow, you have _no _idea how gay that sounded."

Ryouga and Ranma both instantly sent blazing glares up at the descending form of Ryoko as she floated down to join them.

"That's disgusting!"

"_Ryoko_!"

The space pirate giggled shamelessly as she landed beside them. Almost as an afterthought, she formed her familiar energy sword and began to cut open the trap door at their feet. "If it's any consolation, you two would make an _adorable_ couple."

"_Shut up_!" was their stereophonic reply.

Not really eager to put up with any more of the demoness' teasing than was absolutely necessary, Ryouga took the initiative and kicked out the molten edged trap door and hopped down into the darkened interior of the elevator car itself. Forming a small globe of emerald chi in his hand, he began to examine his surroundings through the shimmering, surreal light of his spiritual power.

A moment later, he was joined by his rival and his partner, each adding their own personal brand of illumination to the increasingly crowded cubicle. Just as on the surface, the elevator door appeared to be made of gleaming steel, and judging by the complete lack of lighting, it seemed unlikely that hitting the 'door open' button would have much effect.

Several seconds of the ear piercing squeal of metal being torn asunder later, the door was 'opened' to reveal a long corridor that stretched off into the darkness before them.

Ryouga scratched his head in confusion. "Hey, I thought she said this place was supposed to be filled with crystal?"

To his side, his rival tapped the wall of the corridor, producing a resounding metallic ring. "Must not be able to grow through the metal."

_Well, that sounded promising_. "That must mean she's safe if the whole lab is made out of metal, right?"

Ryoko and Ranma shared a quick look before shrugging in unison. It didn't look like they had any better idea of what to expect than he did. It appeared there would only be one way to get the answers they sought, so the trio began to make their way down the strangely illuminated hallway. The mingling and contrasting shades of emerald, gold and orange dancing along the walls generated unusual shadows which danced in time with the fluid steps of the light wielders.

It didn't take long to reach their destination. Less than twenty meters from the elevator shaft, their short trek ended at a large, vaguely vaultish door which blocked their passage.

Smirking weakly, Ranma chuckled to himself. "I don't suppose either of you have a key?"

Ryoko smiled malevolently, the crackling blade of her energy sword flowing out of the small sphere of power she had been using to illuminate the hallway. "I do."

The two males shared a quick glance before turning back to Ryoko.

"Why don't we try knocking first?" asked Ranma.

Ryouga nodded in agreement, causing his erstwhile partner to pout cutely. "_Man_, you two get to tear apart every door in the place, but when it's my turn, suddenly we should _knock_?" complained Ryoko sullenly.

The would-be-Sheriff shrugged helplessly before moving forward and rapping his knuckles off the metal surface of the door. Rather than the sharp ring he'd been expecting, all that resulted from his knock was a dull thud. Ryouga stared at the door, perplexed for a moment, before knocking again.

"Odd, almost sounds like there's something behind the door," he commented absently.

Ryoko groaned in annoyance, before pushing him to the side for a second time. "Oh, get out of the way already!"

The demoness then rammed her energy sword straight into the heard of the door, pushing it in all the way up to the hilt-

Only to have the crackling orange beam of light pulled from her hands and into the room beyond. A fraction of a second later, violent tremors wracked the corridor, forcing everyone to brace themselves lest they be tossed to the ground. It was several very long and nerve wracking seconds before the earth stopped quaking.

Ryoko looked down at her empty hands, and then to the narrow hole she had burned through the vault door . . . Already, a small spout of shimmering crystal had begun growing through the tiny aperture and into the corridor. The deputy chuckled weakly as she turned to regard her companions. "Heh . . . ummm, my bad . . . wow, that can't be a good sign."

Ryouga shared another glance with his rival. He imagined the determined expression forming on the pigtailed warrior's face mirrored his own. "Dr. Mizuno could be trapped in there," Ryouga explained tersely.

"We gotta help her!" Ranma added.

The cyan haired deputy rolled her eyes before letting out an unladylike snort. "Um, we're not even sure she's _in _there, boys."

"Just shut up and help us open the door!" ordered Ryouga.

Suiting action to word, Ryouga spun and latched onto the side of the heavy metal door, warping the steel with the strength of his grip. On the other side of the door, Ranma wrapped his hands around one of the large metal rods that ran up its surface. Ryoko watched the pair of them, then shrugged before simply punching her fingers straight into the center of the door.

"On three," stated Ryouga.

". . . Three!" they shouted together.

Again the squeal of shearing metal filled the hallway, this time accompanied by the relatively new sound of crystal shattering and raining down on the metallic floor. The laboratory door didn't even stand a chance against the combined strength of the trio and they casually tossed the construct down the corridor behind them.

The forceful removal of the heavy door revealed an unusual, though not entirely unexpected sight. A solid wall of translucent crystal stood directly behind the shredded doorframe. It only took a seconds examination to come to the conclusion that the entire lab was filled, from floor to ceiling, with the otherworldly material-

Ryouga gasped in shock. Near the center of the lab, he could just make out a glimmer of unearthly blue light. Dousing his own illumination, and signaling his companions to do the same, the hallway was once again drowned in pure darkness . . . almost. It took several long seconds for his eyes to adjust, but it soon became apparent to the Lost Boy that the faint glimmer originating from the center of the lab was far more than a trick of his imagination.

Pressing his face right up against the surface of the crystal, Ryouga focused on the eerie light dancing at the center of the lab. Though the rays of light were heavily filtered and distorted by several yards of solid crystal, he could still make out the source of the unearthly, yet strangely beautiful illumination-

The figure of a woman, hanging suspended in midair . . . crystal . . . whatever. The azure light almost seemed to pour out from her body, lending a ghostly air to the poor female's appearance. The effect was only magnified by the nearly ethereal blue ribbons that hung in the air, surrounding the woman in a decidedly meager attempt at modesty.

Pulling his face back from the crystal, leaving only a small trail of blood from where his nose had been pressed, Ryouga turned to his companions and pointed to the glowing figure excitedly.

"She's there!"

Ryoko only rolled her eyes in response. "And how would you know? You don't even know what the nerd looks like."

For just an instant (which was an unusually short time for a Hibiki), Ryouga's fragile temper snapped and he spun on his erstwhile partner and barked harshly, "Ryoko, enough! We have to get her out of there, _now_!"

Of course, where most people would have been intimidated, if not outright quivering masses of panic in the face of an enraged martial arts master, the Ex Space Pirate just waved off his ire with a casual flip of her wrist. "Sheesh, don't blow a gasket. One Geeksicle coming up."

Continuing with her remarkable lack of concern over his anger (which, come to think of it, was pretty reasonable considering she'd already bodily tossed him into a prison cell once this week), the deputy floated forward, obviously intent on phasing through the crystal to save the trapped resear-

A dull 'thunk', like someone dropping a coconut on a table, rang through the metallic hallway as Ryoko's head bounced forcefully off of the wall of translucent material. Instantly, she rubbed her forehead. "_Ow_! . . . Wait a second, _what_?"

Standing behind the pair of law enforcement agents, Ranma shrugged, doing his best not to chuckle at the sight. "It's a completely unknown element that feeds on energy. What did you _think _would happen?"

"Oh, shaddup."

Starting to feel desperation creep up on him at the sight of the helpless female trapped like the proverbial fly in amber, Ryouga took a determined step forward and pulled back his arm. "Fine, then _I'll _get her out. _Bak_-"

Only to have the pigtailed researcher grab his arm in a tight grip. "_Don't_, you idiot. It'll grow back faster than you can blast it with the Bakusai Tenketsu. You'll just end up trapping us all down here."

The rather tenuous hold on his temper was already beginning to slip again, completely unaided by his old rival's casual application of insults, causing Ryouga spun on the Researcher. "Then what?"

"I don't know. Maybe I can . . . or maybe Washu can . . ." The look of uncertainty on Ranma's face told Ryouga everything he needed to know.

"To hell with this!" With that, Ryouga quickly pulled his arm free from Ranma's hold and reared it back again-

"No! Stop-"

-And lashed out with a devastating punch dead center of the door frame. Spreading out from his fist in an infinitely intricate spider web, a series of rapidly deepening cracks began to split the surface of the crystal.

". . . Or you can do that," muttered Ranma. As Ryouga pulled back his fist and slammed it into the crystal again, the pigtailed researcher turned to the cyan haired deputy. "Now why didn't _I _think of that?"

The lovely female shrugged with mild disinterest. "All this hangin around with eggheads must be rubbing off on you. I mean, why do the obvious thing when you can do something in the most needlessly complicated method possible?"

Ranma considered the statement, before nodding sadly at the inherent truth.

Completely oblivious to the inane conversation taking place behind him, Ryouga continued to slam his fists into the blue tinted crystal with wild abandon, slowly and painfully beginning to carve a tunnel into the unusually hard material. Crystal shattered to shards, which powdered to dust as he continued his arduous task, and after only a few minutes, the target of his frantic efforts was nearly within his reach.

He could make out the trapped researcher's features much more clearly now that there was so much less material separating them. From this distance, it was much more obvious at just what a poor job the nearly translucent ribbons were doing of covering the surprisingly well toned researcher's body . . . he was just thankful that the woman's arms were crossed over her chest at the moment; he would have hated passing out just a few feet from rescuing the woman.

Asides from the researcher's rather hard to ignore state of near undress, he could make out her short blue hair, (or was it just tinted that color from the light?) which framed a face wearing a look of shock and fear which marred her otherwise perfect visage. The terrified expression was all it took for Ryouga to redouble his destructive fervor to rescue her.

Again and again his fists slammed into the glassy material; he could barely even feel his knuckles after so many furious impacts – only to pull his last punch frantically short, his bloody fingers hanging mere inches from the trapped female's fear stricken face. It didn't take long to realize his dilemma.

"Crap! How do I break her out without pulverizing her?"

To make matters worse, even as he paused to consider his first dilemma, he saw the makings of another dilemma beginning all around him. Almost as if it was feeding directly on the ethereal light emanating from the entombed researcher, Ryouga could already see the crystal walls of his recently carved tunnel beginning to grow. He was no expert on the growth patterns of space crystal, or how it related to naked ladies that glowed, but Ryouga was pretty sure he didn't have long to figure out this out. As such, he did the only thing he could think of.

"Ranma! What do I do?"

From the far end of the tunnel, he could see his rival shrug helplessly. "How the heck should I know?"

"I thought _you _were supposed to be the genius!" Ryouga looked around desperately before turning back to Ranma. "What would _you _do?"

He could nearly see the tiny gears turning in his rival's head as the pigtailed researcher thought, until Ranma suddenly snapped his fingers. "Minimum effort for maximum effect, Ryouga! It's what Anything Goes is all about!"

Ryouga just stared at the distant martial artist incredulously. "Minimum effort for maximum effect? What kind of _useless, __**idiotic **_nonsense is –"

Everything clicked together in the Lost Boy's head so loudly that he almost imagined that his sudden epiphany was audible to Ranma and Ryoko outside his manmade tunnel. "That's it! Ranma, get your butt in here, I need your help!"

His rival rushed to his side, ducking his head slightly as the corridor slowly shrunk down around them. "What is it?"

"Just get ready to grab her and run," Ryouga barked.

The bandanna clad warrior took several precious seconds to psyche himself up before-

"_Bakusai Tenketsu Revised: Powdering Point_!"

Lashing out at near Amagurinken speeds, his hands blurred forwards, gently tapping dozen's of points across the surface of the researcher's glassy tomb. Each touch, barely even a light caress, transferred only fraction of the normal explosive energy that his infamous Blasting Point Technique was renowned for. Rather than shatter with the force of a fragmentation grenade, the crystal prison simply crumbled to dust and flowed down to the floor.

Of course, almost instantly he could see the crystal powder begin to glimmer with trapped power, but between the high speed of his attack, the incremental amount of energy he used and the infinitesimal surface area of each grain of powdered crystal, the reformation was occurring at a much slower rate than he was digging through the last several inches of his quarry's prison.

Within a mere thirty seconds, Ryouga's prolonged ministrations, he was finally able to erode enough of the crystal away to reveal their trapped researcher enough for his rival to pull her free from her would be tomb. Idly, even as the pigtailed researcher dragged the unconscious female free from the crystal's icy clutches, Ryouga noticed that her hair was, indeed, blue and not just a trick of the light.

Before the Hibiki could turn to apply his new technique to the increasingly narrow tunnel that led out of the lab, he nearly stumbled, a sudden wave of dizziness nearly overtaking him. Rather than ask what the problem was, Ranma just turned and thrust the scantily clad woman into his arms.

"Don't worry, man. I'll get us outta here! _Katchu Tenshin Amagurinken_!"

Suddenly the Saotome Heir's fists lashed out in an omni-directional blur that made Ryouga seriously reconsider his definition of 'near Amagurinken speeds'. He didn't have time to boggle, though, as his rival quickly began to pull away from him, burrowing through the collapsing tunnel in a display of raw speed that threatened to leave the fanged warrior and his rescuee in his dust, both figurative and literal.

It couldn't have taken more than a minute to escape back to the hallway, though it felt like several years longer than that to Ryouga. And by the time they did, both martial artists began coughing up lungfulls of powdered crystal in a series of hacking wheezes. The thought of several long nights talking to doctors about the effects of breathing in powdered crystal and whether or not he would be able to claim disability roughly thirty minutes into his new job _almost _made Ryouga forget the nearly naked girl currently cradled in his arms. At least, now that they weren't being held up by the crystal, the blue tinged ribbons that had been floating around her were actually draped across her lithe body offering at least a modicum of modesty . . .

"Sheesh, are you two okay?" asked a surprisingly concerned sounding Ryoko.

Ryouga was about to resort to the stock, macho response – when a weak cough from several inches below him drew his attention. Immediately, Ryouga, Ryoko and Ranma all turned their gazes to the blue haired scientist as she let out another weak cough. None of them, not even the cold hearted space pirate, could hid their amazement as the young woman's eyes actually began to flutter, struggling to open.

_That__'s an impressive recovery time, even by Nerima standards_, thought an incredulous Hibiki.

And then the researcher's eyes finally opened, revealing a pair of crystal blue orbs the likes of which he had never seen before. The fathomless eyes locked on to his for a moment, filled with uncertainty, only to shift down a moment later, as she shifted her gaze to take in her own condition. A second later, the lovely scientist's face went as red as Ranma's favorite shirt; interestingly, the blush went all the way down to-

Ryouga quickly clenched his eyes shut and turned away, if only to redirect the imminent threat of an explosive bloody nose.

A strange rustling sound prompted him to look again, however, and he watched in fascination as the bluish ribbons that were draped across the female's body hastily began to wrap around her, only to form into a tightly fitting and highly modified sailor suit.

"Oh, yeah, that's _sooo _much less revealing. Heh, nice legs, by the way." Ryoko's sarcastic remark was completely unnecessary . . . though not completely untrue.

Even though it seemed impossible, the sailor suited woman's face went an even deeper shade of red at the deputy's snide remark. She then shyly looked up in his direction once more.

"Ummm . . . you can put me down now . . ."

Ryouga started at the request. "_Oh_! Ah, yeah, no problem."

As soon as he put her down, the lovely, if still a bit scantily clad, woman took a moment to silently unfluster herself. The deep breaths she was taking wasn't doing anything to reduce Ryouga's level of fluster, but he was pretty sure that there was zero chance of him bringing that up in any manner that wouldn't make him sound like a complete moron.

Finally, the young scientist looked around, an increasingly worried expression blooming on her face as she noticed just who else was present in the hallway with them. "Ahhh . . . thank you, Citizens. I am Sailor Mercury, Champion of love and justice . . . heh . . ."

_Huh_? Ryouga scratched his head in confusion. "Sailor Mercury? I thought your name was Ami Mizuno . . ."

Raw panic flashed across Sailor Mercury's face as she quickly looked to Ryoko's smirking face then back to Ryouga. ". . . W-why would you think something like that, sir? I can assure you that –"

"Maybe cuz I told him when he was ogling your half naked body?" Ryoko interrupted the feeble attempt at deception with a viciously wide smile on her lips.

"Or, because this is _your _lab?" added Ranma, smirking in pure amusement.

Dr. Mizuno's face flushed red for a second time. "Ahhh . . . oh . . . Deputy, _please_, you can't tell the Sheriff about this. You have no idea what kind of trouble I could get in."

Ranma's smirk doubled in size into a full-blown smile. "Oh, I think we have a pretty good idea. Don't worry, though. I _promise _I won't tell the Sheriff your secret."

"Oh, thank you so much, Dr. Saotome!" The panicked researcher turned sailor turned to Ryoko, fixing her with an expectant look.

The exaggerated rolling of her eyes was enough to set off warning klaxons in even Ryouga's head as the ex-space pirate replied. "Oh, don't you worry, Dr. Mizuno. I won't tell the Sheriff either. I couldn't _possibly _do something _that _vindictive."

Apparently Dr. Mizuno was more socially backwards than Ryouga himself, as she released a vivid sigh of relief. "I can't begin to tell you how grateful I am."

Then, almost as if she had forgotten he was there, Dr. Mizuno turned back in his direction, an incredibly cute mixture of shyness and embarrassment tingeing her cheeks pink. The young woman took a moment to tuck several strands of her ocean blue hair behind her ears as she locked her gaze with his own. "I'm sorry, but . . . I don't believe we've met."

Ryouga chuckled goofily, his own cheeks starting to flush in response. "Um, no, Dr. Mizuno. I'm-"

"Oh, no!" Only to have Ryoko wrap her deceptively powerful arm around his neck and pull him down into a headlock, cutting his introduction breathtakingly short. "No way, buddy! You _owe _me this one!"

Unable to argue the point (having mostly to do with lack of oxygen than anything else), Ryouga was helpless to stop the wickedly smiling deputy as she quickly grabbed Dr. Mizuno's hand and shoved it roughly into his hand, locking them into a sloppy hand shake. Ryoko then pushed the point home, shaking their hands up and down several times.

"Scientist, _Sheriff. _Sheriff, scientist."

The aforementioned sheriff felt terrible as the scientist's eyes shot wide open in mortification. Dr. Mizuno quickly lanced Ryoko with a desperate glance.

"_Please _tell me that you're joking."

Ryoko shook her head with an over abundance of self satisfaction. "Oh, but the truth is just so much more _fun _right now."

Ryouga rolled his eyes. "Don't mind Ryoko, Dr. Mizuno. She did the same thing to me. I think she gets some kind of perverse enjoyment out of it."

His erstwhile partner smirked evilly. "No. Not some kind. It's definitely perverse."

Over the next several seconds, Ryouga was treated to the intriguing sight of watching the blood drain from the lovely scientist's face, adding strongly to the ghostly image of her that he'd seen earlier.

"Y-you're really the new sheriff . . . and you know _everything_?" Dr. Mizuno's last word came out in a painful squeak.

The wandering Hibiki ran his hand through his hair in mild embarrassment at the good doctors discomfort. "Well, temporary sheriff, really. You see-"

"Oh my! Your hands, they're bleeding!" Dr. Mizuno's shocked exclamation cut him off quickly.

Thinking quickly, Ryouga pulled his hand forward to check it . . . and indeed, his hand was indeed covered in blood. Gingerly, he reached back to touch the back of his head with his other hand, only to feel his hair slicked back into a sticky mess. "Ahhh, that's just gross! I must have done that punching through all that crystal."

Nearly forgotten in the background, Ranma took the cue to look at his own bleeding hands. "Ah, _man_! Look at my nails. I'm gonna need the _Pedicure of the Fierce Tiger _to fix these up."

To the pigtailed researcher's side, Ryoko rolled her eyes in disgust. "And he wonders why I call him Lady Fingers," she muttered mostly to herself.

Back at center stage, the sailor suited scientist looked up to catch Ryouga's gaze once more, an unreadable look in her eyes. "Y-you did that . . . just to save me?"

Unable to identify the unusual tone in the attractive female's voice, the sheriff began chuckling nervously again. Luckily for him, he was saved from descending into complete idiocy when he noticed he was halfway to rubbing the back of his head again. Looking at his dripping hand, then back to Dr. Mizuno in shy embarrassment (as opposed to hallucinetic euphoria), he replied with – "Heh, ummm, well, it _is _a martial artist's duty to protect pretty girls."

Even as the blue haired researcher's cheeks went red at the half intentioned compliment, back in the periphery Ryoko leaned toward Ranma. "Hey, he never tried to protect _me _from that rat thing," she whispered hotly.

The pigtailed researcher just rolled his eyes. "He said _pretty _girls, Deputy."

Lost completely in their tiny little moment, neither Ryouga, nor Ami even registered the sounds of unholy violence erupt from behind them. Instead, the lovely doctor gently took the sheriff's abused hands into her own, examining them with surprising skill.

"If only I had a cloth to clean off the blood; my skirt is too tear resistant to use, though . . ."

Ryouga thanked the gods for that small miracle. _Like it wasn't short enough already!_

"Um, you can use one of my bandannas." He quickly pulled off one of the aforementioned articles and handed it to her. The blue haired researcher did a quick double take at the fact that he was still wearing a bandanna, even as he handed her one, but shook off her surprise just as quickly. Without even a second thought, she expertly began to clean and bandage his hands, pulling off several extra bandannas as she required them.

During the entire process, Ryouga couldn't do anything but stare at the weakly smiling doctor, his own cheeks flushed bright red at the intimate contact –

At least until Ryoko cleared her throat with deliberate loudness. He shot the cyan haired deputy a quick look, only to receive a painfully pointed stare in return. Even with his understanding of females (or lack thereof), he got the gist of her meaning.

"_Oh_, oh, right." Even though he regretted it painfully, as soon as Ami finished her gentle ministrations, Ryouga politely pulled his hands from hers and did his best to school his features to his approximation of a 'professional look'. "Dr. Mizuno . . . I'm afraid that we need you to come back to Global Dynamics with us."

Ami let out a resigned sigh before nodding in defeat. "I understand. I suppose that Agent Ikari would like to . . . discuss my _moonlighting _. . ."

Ryouga shook his head in the negative. "Ah, we're not actually here about that. You see-" He gestured rather pointedly to the crystal filled laboratory behind her. "- we're here to get your help because your experiment has gone out of control and is only hours away from destroying the entire GeoFront."

The blue haired researcher slowly turned to regard the incrementally growing mass of crystal, raising a hand to touch her cheek in shock.

"Oh . . . well . . . that's much worse . . ."

OOOoooOOO

"So, I have good news and I have bad news," Washu stated proudly for her captive audience.

She pointed dramatically to the large holographic display currently hanging over the heads of everyone standing around Gendo's office. Agent Ikari, Doctor Ikari, Doctor Mizuno, Doctor Akagi, Doctor Saotome, Sheriff Hibiki and Deputy Hakubi all gazed up at the massive representation of the GeoFront and the crystal mass currently residing just beneath the sleepy little town.

"With the removal of Doctor Mizuno from the crystal construct, its rate of growth has decreased noticeably."

Gendo didn't shift his gaze in the slightest as he addressed the aforementioned researcher. "This _will _be discussed, Dr. Mizuno."

Ami shrunk in on herself in terrified anticipation, at least until Dr. Ikari dropped a gentle hand onto the Government Liaison's shoulder. "Gendo . . ."

Washu cleared her throat loudly to put an end to the quickly shifting focus of attention.

"_The bad news_, is that even without her powers to sustain it, the crystal is still feeding on numerous other power sources, even geothermal, _and _even at its reduced rate of growth, the western front of the mass will come into contact with the subterranean fusion reactor that powers this facility within a matter of _hours_."

"At which point," interjected Dr. Akagi, "Its rate of growth will no longer be _reduced_."

Washu nodded emphatically. "Considering how far its grown in only two weeks with only Dr. Mizuno for its main power source, I theorize that the uncontrolled growth of the crystal will swallow Japan in a matter of days. Due to the unknown nature of the material, I can't even hypothesis as to how much of the planet we could lose."

Everyone present turned to glare at the blue haired scientist.

"Way to destroy the planet, Poindexter," snorted a snarky Ryoko.

The strapping young sheriff interposed himself between Dr. Mizuno and the deputy. "Ryoko! She didn't _mean _to doom us all!"

Everyone's gazes shifted to the sheriff for a moment, mostly of the incredulous variety.

Ami was the first to recover.

"Actually, the situation isn't as dire as you theorize, Professor Hakubi."

The group gaze shifted back to the blue haired researcher once more. The young doctor shifted nervously under their combined stares, but quickly pulled out a small blue device which looked suspiciously like a PDA. Ami then pressed a button on the side of the device . . . then waited for several long seconds, apparently waiting for something to happen-

"Oh, no! The batteries must have been drained! . . . Wait a moment." Acting quickly, she flipped the small computer over and pulled a small data storage device from the bottom. Examining her prize for a moment, she then held it out to Washu. "Professor, can you upload this disk and find a file name 'CT-S'?"

Washu quirked an eyebrow at the young scientist. Why did everyone keep asking if she could do such simple tasks? It was more than slightly insulting to the Universe's Greatest Genius. With a derisive tap of a finger, the red headed Head of Research pressed a button on her holographic interface.

"Done."

Ami took a moment to glance at the small device still held firmly between her finger and thumb before shrugging and sticking it behind her back . . . presumably into a pocket . . . she presumed.

"Ahem," continued the blue haired researcher, "Contrary to what you think, the growth of the crystal is _highly _structured. If you open the file, you will see the end result of the construct's growth."

Mildly interested, Washu entered a short series of commands which caused the floating representation of the Global Dynamics facility to disappear. A second later, it was replaced by an extremely different holographic image: what appeared to be a massive crystal pentagram with a large spire rising from its center. The geometrical and aesthetic perfection of the structure was something for even the jaded galactic level scientist to behold.

Everyone else was equally awed.

"W-what is it?" asked their adorable, if a bit slow, new sheriff.

Dr. Mizuno let out a defeated sigh. " . . . It's Crystal Tokyo . . ."

". . ."

Silence hung over the room for several long seconds before, in his own unique way, Dr. Saotome attempted to break the growing tension. With a mildly bored shrug of his shoulders, the pigtailed researcher let out a dismissive huff. "So, what's the big deal with that, then? I mean, now that we know that it ain't just gonna keep on growin till the world blows up, all we gotta do is worry about ourselves, right?"

In a somewhat tedious fashion, Ami sighed once more. "Unfortunately, Dr. Saotome, the situation is _more _dire than _you_ think. Professor Washu, could you please overlay this schematic with the schematic for the Global Dynamics facility? Set the center of the structure to coincide with my lab."

With a quick nod, Washu complied even more quickly, her fingers dancing across her holographic interface light lightning. Instantly, everyone in the room leaned back instinctively as the depiction of the crystal pentagram suddenly swelled to twice it's size, nearly filling the room from one wall to the other. A moment later, the familiar wire-frame of the GD facility reappeared, roughly dead center of the large structure . . .

Except that the GD facility, including the town, the forests, even the GeoFront itself barely registered more than a foot in diameter at the heart of the (now obviously) massive structure. To call the entire GeoFront a small suburb in the sprawling crystal metropolis would be an overstatement of worrying proportions.

Nearly hiding behind an oblivious Dr. Saotome, Dr. Akagi blinked repeatedly. "That is . . . impressive."

Dr. Mizuno nodded sadly. "Unfortunately, Crystal Tokyo is a structure _easily _visible from space, so . . ."

Ranma whistled in appreciation. "So blowing our cover is the least of our worries."

Agent Ikari nodded gravely. "Having a city the size of . . . well, the size of _Tokyo _forming nearly a kilometer under the Earth's surface; I can scarcely even imagine all of the implications."

"Well, us being screwed is a given." Washu offered the gathered geniuses (plus Ryoko and Ryouga) her cheerful assessment freely. "The effect it would have on Japan would be pretty bad, too. Even at the at the rate which it's currently expanding, simple mass displacement will start playing havoc with the geological stability of the country . . . and Japan has never been overly stable as it is."

Yui shuddered visibly. "However, if it were to reach the fusion reactor, it's rate of growth would increase exponentially."

Washu nodded in agreement. "It'll be like dropping a Triphasic torpedo on a fault line. We're talking volcanoes, earthquakes, tidal waves; the works, really. The after shocks would _not _be limited to Japan."

The look on poor Dr. Mizuno's face at that moment could only be described as despondent.

Ryoko smirked wickedly. "And all that from one little crystal? That's _awesome_! Hey, maybe they'll name the ocean where Japan used to be after you. The Sailor Mercury Sea has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"

Even as Ami's already pale face took on a decidedly green tinge at _that _unpleasant thought, the dashing young sheriff dropped a reassuring hand on the blue haired scientist's shoulder. The young Hibiki then leveled a heated glare at the cyan haired deputy. "That's enough, Ryoko."

Her daughter responded with a flippant shrug of her shoulders. "Yeah, yer right. It doesn't exactly roll off the tongue."

Of course, while all of the mindless foolishness was occurring, Agent Ikari, looking as unflappable as ever, stared intently at the tiny, tiny little blip that silently hung at the heart of the sprawling crystal metropolis.

"Your inane chatter is irrelevant, as that outcome will not come to pass." Gendo slowly spun around, setting his gaze on each and every one of them. "Ladies, Gentlemen, we have several hours, at best, to produce a solution. I suggest we begin."

"-or the last time, Professor Hakubi, shifting the mass to another dimension might not work. The magical nature of the crystal may be resistant to the dimensional shift, but the massive energy required to create such a shift would _definitely _have the same effect as plugging it directly into the fusion reactor itself," stated an emphatic Dr. Mizuno.

It looked, to Ryouga's untrained eye, that Washu didn't appreciate being lectured to by someone that was likely half her age . . . except that she looked twice her age . . . hmmm, probably best not to think about that one again, it was just a headache waiting to happen.

As if to prove his point, the red haired Head of Research scoffed loudly. "Listen here, Neophyte. There is no such thing as magic, this is simply a unique substance generated by an exotic energy source. Once we determine its nature, we will be able to devise a method to control its growth."

Ryouga quirked an eyebrow at that statement, or, at least the middle part. "No such thing as magic? What are you talking about? Get me a glass of cold water and I'll show you some-_mmph_!"

His notably bitter diatribe was cut off sharply as Ranma slapped a hand over his mouth. His hated rival than whispered harsly into his ear. "Ixnay on the urse-cay in front of Ashu-Way . . . _oron-may_!"

The fanged warrior tore the pigtailed researcher's hand off his mouth, shooting the offender a smoldering glare. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Instantly he realized he'd left himself wide open for _something_, as a nasty smirk twisted his rival's lips. "What? I thought _you _would be an expert at _pig_-latin."

"Oh, _that's it_! Ranma! _Prepare to die!"_

Just as he crouched down to launch himself bodily at the pigtailed bastard, Agent Ikari's lovely wife interposed herself between them, holding up her hands pleadingly. "Gentlemen, _please_! Fighting won't solve anything."

To the side, Ryoko pouted adorably. "Awww, come on! I've been _waiting_ to see that jerk get taken down a peg."

Ranma shot a quick look at the deputy. "Who, him or me?"

She replied with a quick shrug. "Either way is good, really."

Ryouga shifted to the side, but Yui moved to stay between them. That, coupled with the presence of so many fragile females (and one that wasn't fragile at all), was making it annoyingly hard for him to simply bull across the room and tackle his rival out the thirteenth story, plate-glass window.

"Just let me rupture his spleen; that isn't vital, is it?" he asked plaintively.

The gentle sensation of a hand coming to rest on his shoulder pulled him back a few inches from the metaphysical cliff of his temper. He turned to see who his rival's savior was . . . only to regret it instantly as he found himself staring into a pair of fathomless blue orbs filled with compassion. "Please, Sheriff, don't you think this situation is frustrating enough without breaking out into violence?"

Feeling more than a tad petulant, Ryouga pouted fiercely. "But breaking out into violence is how I deal with my frustration," he explained grumpily.

Across from him, Ranma chuckled in amusement. "At least until I beat him _again_ and he ends up even more frustrated than he started."

Ryouga nodded sadly at the inherent truth of the statement. "It _is _a vicious cycle . . . speaking of which – _Shi Shi-"_

A second before the infuriated Lost Boy could lift his arms to cross them across his chest for his signature attack, his world burst into a wave of colors and stars. He hit the ground a second later, the painful sting ringing through the back of his head feeling strangely reminiscent to similar _treatment _he received the very same night he had arrived in this crazy town.

"Idiot! No blowing up researchers until _after _the world is saved!" barked a fuming Deputy.

Ami looked at Ryoko oddly. "I thought you _wanted _them to fight."

"Well, yeah," agreed the space pirate, "But not when my apartment is in danger of getting trashed!"

From his new home indented into the floor, Ryouga growled irately. "Damn it, if I don't get to kill Ranma before we all die, I'm gonna be pissed! Can't you just, you know, turn off the apocalypse for a few minutes? A few minutes is all I need."

Again his rival donned his patented condescending smirk. "To get pummeled? I'd saw one would do."

Yui shot a pointed glare in the pigtailed researcher's direction. "Dr. Saotome, you aren't helping."

Seeing a potential opening, Ryouga began to rise to his feet – but didn't make it far before he was smacked back down into his custom fitted crater. This time it was an annoyed looking Washu staring down at him, a large paper fan in her hand for some reason . . . wait a minute, had she just laid _him _out with a freakin' _paper fan_?

"Don't be simple, Sheriff! Do you think that if we could just turn it off, that we wouldn't have done it already? This is a highly exotic element that is literally tap dancing with the laws of physics; what do you want us to do, ask it _nicely _to stop destroying Japan?"

Feeling a bit put out, not to mention a bit leery at the prospect of trying to regain his feet again, Ryouga tapped his fingers petulantly against the floor, destroying the once smooth surface even further. "You don't have to be so _snippy_. I mean, it's only _Ranma _I want to kill. It's not like he's actually doing anything he . . ."

His small rant trailed off as his gaze errantly slid in the direction of a certain blue haired scientist. "Ummm, Dr. Mizuno, is something wrong?"

His inquiry instantly drew the attention of everyone else in the room to the moonlighting vigilante. Apparently he wasn't the only one to think the fact that her face had suddenly gone red and she was holding her hands to her temples in mortification while chanting "Stupid, stupid, stupid" was just slightly odd.

Taking notice of the heaping helping of attention she was receiving, Ami snapped out of her self-degradation cycle.

"I'm so _stupid_. How could I _forget_?"

"Dr. Mizuno . . .?" Asked Agent Ikari in a pointedly leading manner.

Even though it seemed impossible, the blue haired woman's face went an even deeper shade of red. "Ummm . . . well . . . you see, we – we _can turn it off. _I just need one piece of equipment."

"A photon drill?" offered Washu.

"A flux capacitor?" supplied Ritsuko.

"A sonic screwdriver?" inquired Ranma.

Dr. Mizuno just stared at the trio for a long moment, before shaking her head twice for good measure. ". . . A cell phone . . ."

In a flash of speed that impressed even the floored Hibiki, Gendo's hand zipped into his jacket and reappeared with a sleek black cell phone that undoubtedly came with some super awesome government calling plan. Without a second's hesitation, the government liaison handed the phone to Dr. Mizuno, shooting her a flat glance. "Dare I ask?"

Smiling weakly, she replied, "I'd really rather that you didn't."

With that, she hastily began dialing out someone's phone number. Deciding to take advantage of the distraction, Ryouga finally flipped himself up to his feet and dusted himself off. Already having forgotten just who'd planted him in the floor in the first place, he leaned towards his deputy. "So, who do you think she's calling?"

His partner shrugged her deceptively narrow shoulders. "I dunno, Goddess Hotline?"

"Why would she call them? Took them _three _hours to deliver that pizza I ordered."

The pair of them were immediately shushed by the rest of the room as Ami finished dialing the number and held the phone up to her ear. Everyone present held their breaths for several seconds long seconds, waiting for-

"Ah! Hello, Usagi! It's A-"

Rather unexpectedly, the blue haired researcher cut off of introduction, opting instead to stand there, staring out into nothing for several long moments.

"Um, Usagi, this is Ami. There's a . . . situation I could use your help with, so . . . if you could call me back as soon as possible, that would be wonderful . . . so, bye, I guess."

With a disturbingly final sounding beep from the phone, Ami ended to call, only to see everyone staring at her incredulously. Unsurprisingly, Ryoko was the first to break the silence. "Heh, wow. So now I get to tell Tenchi that an _answering machine _destroyed Japan."

Ranma shook his head sadly. "And, you forgot to leave Gendo's number . . ."

Ami slapped a hand to her forehead. "_Stupid, stupid, stupid_!"

Feeling a bit bad for the young woman, as she didn't seem to be handling her unintentional destruction of Japan all that well, he placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder again. "Now calm down, Dr. Mizuno. You _aren't _stupid, that's _Ranma's _job-"

"_Hey_! _Researcher _over here!"

"-Now, do you know any other ways to get a hold your friend? Could you call her parents, some other friends, a boyfriend? Anything you can think of might help."

The blue haired researcher's face took on a thoughtful caste, as she seemed to consider his inquiry. Slowly, the red began to drain from her face and she calmly handed Gendo back his phone. Then, with deliberate calm, she pulled out a small, blue watch from . . . somewhere behind her back. She held it up for them all to see.

"This is my senshi communicator. I know I could reach any of my friends with it, no matter what, however the crystal has undoubtedly drained its power, just as it drained my computer."

Washu took an excited step forward. "Wait, the friend you were just calling was another of the Sailor Scouts?"

Ami sent a nervous glance in Gendo's direction before nodding. "Our leader, but what-"

She was cut off as the Head of Research began cackling maniacally. "Aha! It looks like the ball is in Washu's court now!"

Immediately, the diminutive genius began typing away madly at her keyboard, prompting another screen, roughly four foot by six, to appear before them. In a grand fashion, Washu gestured to the screen proudly. "It just so happens that, starting just yesterday, I have been devising a method to locate and hack into exotic signal carriers, the same bands that, theoretically speaking, a group of . . ." Washu grimaced profoundly. "_Magical _girls might use to stay in contact."

Agent Ikari started, if only imperceptibly. "The surface contact permission you requested."

The boastful super genius nodded excitedly. "Granted, I only started developing the program yesterday, but I've already made some progress. I already have five separate Magical Girl team signals identified and monitored, but I just haven't had time to find the right group."

Dr. Mizuno gasped in shock. "You're monitoring the communications of Magical Girls? That's completely unethical!"

Washu rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. It's not like I'm spying on them for any _super important _secrets. It's just that listening to those girly girls going on about love and justice is better than any soap opera." "Really? Awesome, you gotta set me up with that, mom!"

Before things could degenerate any further, though, Gendo cleared his throated loudly. "Dr. Mizuno, if you have the signal frequency necessary to contact your comrades, I suggest you give it to Washu now. Provided you don't desire to be buried under several hundred million tons of debris, that is."

Ami looked around at all of the expectant faces currently staring at her, before clearing her own throat. "Ahem, right, of course."

The blue haired scientist quickly joined the red haired scientist at her computer and inputted whatever series of digits it was that composed the frequency they needed. With one last, deft touch of the 'Enter' key, the screen hanging in the air suddenly blinked to life.

What they saw, though, was hardly inspiring. All that could be seen through the screen was . . . a ceiling, or a floor, though the fringe of what looked like a lamp shade somewhat supported the former supposition. A light fixture could be seen on the ceiling, though it wasn't currently on. If anything, it looked like they were looking up from someone's nightstan-

"_Oh, Mamoru_!"

Instantly, Ami's face flushed as red as the sun. To her side, Ryouga dropped like a sack of bricks, flopping back into his human shaped indentation. Ritsuko, Yui and Ranma all had the good graces to start blushing as well, while Gendo coughed politely into his hand and turned away. Washu merely leaned in closer, obvious interest on her face as the sounds of two people _really _enjoying themselves continued to flow through the virtual speakers unabated.

Ryoko, on the other hand, cheered enthusiastically. "Alright, _Mom_! You finally sprang for the Playboy Channel!"

Immediately, even (that wasn't unconscious in a slowly spreading pool of blood) spun on the shameless deputy and shushed her loudly, when-

"Wait, did you hear that, Usagi?"

Ranma, Gendo, Washu, Ritsuko, Yui, Ami and Ryoko all froze like a herd of deer in the headlights of a barreling tractor trailer.

". . . Yes, I did . . . it almost sounded like my-"

The image presented by the screen suddenly shifted wildly as a massive hand entered the scene, obviously picking up the communicator. After several seconds, the view reoriented itself so that it revealed the face (and notably bare shoulders) of a very lovely blonde woman. Instantly, the telegenic female's gaze locked onto Dr. Mizuno, her eyes widening in surprise.

"_Ami_! Where are you? We've been trying to get a hold of you for _wee_ . . ." The blonde's concerned inquiry trailed off as her eyes slowly began to take in the whole of the situation. ". . . Ami, is it just me, or are you standing in a room full of people that can see me naked right now?"

Still as red as a beet, Ami nodded timidly. "It's, ah, it's something like that . . ."

Instantly, everyone in the room was forced to cover their as a high pitched, nearly super sonic wail suddenly filled the air, attacking eardrums and wracking minds for miles around.

"_Cut the visual_!" came Ami's frantic shout.

With a disappointed pout, Washu complied and a moment later, the broad screen flashed to black. The shriek, on the other hand, took another thirty seconds to finally subside.

Looking more than just a little hesitant, Ami tentatively reached a hand out to the blank screen. "Are – are you still there, Usagi?"

There was a short pause, playing on the already frazzled nerves of everyone –

"Of course I am, Ami. In fact, I can't _wait _until your next visit –" The statement was made in such an overly cheerful tone that even the unconscious Ryouga shuddered faintly.

Quickly, Ami turned to Washu and mouthed, 'Cancel my vacations'.

"-So, what do you need that is _so _important?" finished the suddenly saccharine Usagi.

Dr. Mizuno tugged at her collar. "I . . . I don't suppose you have . . . _that _on you at the moment?"

Ryoko snickered silently. "Didn't look like she had much of anything on her, except maybe a han-" But was cut off starkly as Washu stomped on her foot.

"What do you mean by _that_?" asked the dulcet disembodied voice.

Ami looked around the room nervously. "You know . . . _that_? The really, really _important _that?"

". . . _Oh!_ Oh, _that _that! Of course I have it, Ami. But why would you need to know that?"

The blue haired scientist began wringing her hands in front of her. "Wellll . . . I've had a – a _slight _mishap at work-"

Working proactively, Ritsuko slapped a hand over Ranma's mouth just before he could burst into laughter.

"Oh, no! Is everything alright?"

Ami looked around, flushing badly once more. Amazingly enough, Ryouga was vaguely able to notice this fact, as consciousness was once again befriending him.

". . . Yeees. I just need you to use _that _to do a quick favor for me."

"Of course, just let me get it out."

The sound of fabric being sifted through filled the air, interrupted briefly by – "Hey, that's _not _your locket!" followed by some girlish giggling.

Ryouga, _almost _up to his elbows, dropped back into the sweet bliss of unconsciousness instantly.

"Okay, I got it. So, what do you need me to do?"

Taking a deep breath, and doing her very best to ignore Agent Ikari's highly disapproving look, Ami explained, "You see, there is currently a growth of crystal located in Japan . . . _special _crystal, and I was hoping that you could find it with _that_."

"Umm . . . suuure. Just gimme a sec." Several seconds ticked by. "_Woooo_! That's a _big _crystal you got there, Ami. You thinking of getting into the jewelry business?"

"No, not really. Now, Usagi, this is really important. Can you use _that _to render the crystal inert so as to cease its rapid rate of replication?"

". . . No . . ."

The world was almost treated to the first documented case of septupal spontaneous human combustion as everyone stared at the black screen in abject shock.

"_Why not_?" Ami asked the question roaring through all of their minds.

". . . Because I have no idea what you said . . ."

Before anyone of the GD side of the conversation could explode, literally or figuratively, the rushed sound of a male whispering could be heard from the Tokyo end of the conversation.

"_Ohhh_! Is _that _all? Sure, heck, just let me shrink it back to its original size, too-"

"_**NO**_!" came the unanimous uproar.

Ami chuckled nervously, before coughing surreptitiously into her hand. "T-that's really not necessary, Usagi. It's ah – loadbearing . . ."

The gathered congregation could almost _hear _the blonde warrior of love and justice shrug her shoulders through the blackened screen. "Okie Dokie! There ya go, all done! _Now_, about you calling me during my _private _ti-"

The sharp interrogative was cut off abruptly as Ami dove for the holographic keyboard and slapped her entire hand down and through the disconnect button –

"_Gottagobye_!"

And without even the slightest aplomb, the screen vanished back to the nothingness which spawned it. As soon as it did, Ami let out a grand sigh of relief.

"Thank goodness that disaster is over."

Unfortunately, it was then that she turned around, right into the smoldering glares of both Agent Ikari and Professor Hakubi. Shrinking visibly beneath the combined heat of their glares, the young researcher reiterated her relieved sigh with a sigh of deepest resignation.

"My disaster is only beginning, isn't it?"


	6. Epilogue

Epilogue

Here we go, done at last, jiggety jig! The plot bunny that was this story is finally and completely burned out of my skull and I may joyouslyreturn to working on Dark Titans full time . . . at least until the next half baked, insane plot idea pops into my head.

I have to say, it's been an interesting ride, if extremely frustrating. I learned an important thing writing this tale: when doing your outline, don't inject every single line of dialogue into it as you go. By the time I finished the outline on this, I realized I hadn't written an outline, I had freakin written a fifty plus thousand word story all in _present tense_. Hell, the only reason it took me so long to post this story was because I had to re-write the entire damn thing into past tense and flesh out everything around the dialogue.

Still, I'd like to think that I've managed to pull off the very slippery trick of writing a MegaCrossover story that people enjoyed, and hopefully the lot of you agree with me on that -

Now go away, shoo, ya bother me . . .

But please, Enjoy if you will, Tolerate if you won't.

OOOoooOOO

Pushing his slowly drifting glasses back in place for the umpteenth time since he had originally sat down to work, Gendo let out a weary breath. All he could see were the mountains of paperwork that surrounded him on all sides, burying his desk and surrounding his chair like an ominous prison of pulp. Just like the singular report before him, roughly ninety percent of the burdensome workload consisted of the various damage claims that had racked up with shocking rapidity over the past two days.

'I'll have to ask Mr. Hibiki about this claim for a demolished ice cream truck later,' he mused silently.

A whisper of sound to his side heralded the first bit of good news that he had received all morning. He turned to regard Yui as she seemingly glided across his office floor. His flat scowl melted into a fond smile, only to widen into a thankful grin as he noticed the steaming cup of coffee balancing in the lovely scientist's hands. With grace that threatened to take the otherwise stoic man's breath away, his wife placed the cup before him (thankfully covering a number of damage claims) before draping herself comfortably across his shoulders.

"How are you holding up, dear?" she whispered teasingly into his ear.

Sighing weakly, Gendo replied wearily. "Let me just say that Ryoko's space walk idea is starting to look quite appealing."

His loving wife giggled in a manner that caused his heart to flip-flop in a most undignified manner.

"Now, is that anyway for a prospective father to be speaking?"

At _that _Gendo blanched as he felt his heart attempt burst out from his ribcage.

"Don't even _joke _about that, Yui. You know that I would make a terrible father."

His fervent reply elicited a sweet laugh from the researcher before she leaned in to plant a soft kiss on his cheek. "_I'll _be the judge of that."

Then, regretfully, she pushed herself up from her perch and moved around him to sit on the only bare corner of his desk. "Now, back to business for a moment," she stated in her 'work voice', "You'll be happy to know that Dr. Brain and Agent Sagura managed to capture the escaped experiment."

Following her cue, he took a moment to calmly fold his hands before his mouth and tilt his glasses so that they would glint, just so, in the light. "And the reasons for the mutations . . . _further _mutations?"

Only to have Yui playfully swat his folded hands back down. "How many times have I told you not to do that? How can I tell if you're making funny faces at me?"

Gendo smirked, which was more or less as close to playful as he was capable of yet. "Me? Resort to such silliness? You wound me, Yui."

A shiver ran up his spine as she donned a wicked smile, leaning forward seductively. "If you keep it up, I just might. Maybe a good spa-"

"Agent Ikari! Your appointment is here!" The cheerful voice of Nuku Nuku burst from the intercom on his desk, shocking the living daylights out of _both _Ikari's. Instantly, Yui's face flushed red and she leaned back quickly. Gendo, who was definitely _not _blushing in any way, for no reason whatsoever, straightened his tie. It only took him several seconds after that to remember to hit the respond button.

"Thank you, Nuku. Please have her wait until I call her. I'm just finishing a meeting."

"Yes, sir!"

Yui giggled mischievously as Gendo let out an uncharacteristically relieved sigh. "You know," she tittered, "We _are _married now, we've really got to stop acting like a pair of teenagers sneaking intimate little moments all around the facility."

Shaking his head, he could hardly disagree. "Some habits are hard to break, it appears. Still, we _should _wrap this up quickly. I still have several other important issues to attend to, not the least of which being Dr. Mizuno. Then, after I finish sacrificing another old growth forest to the gods of bureaucracy, we can get back to discussing my . . . punishment."

His wife's eyes flashed with excitement, but the woman quickly schooled herself before gracing him with a gentle smile. "Please, try not to be too hard on her."

He frowned as much as possible when his wife was concerned. "It is a tremendous breach of our codes. But, then again, if her misconduct was made public, her head would _not _be the only one to roll." A sly smile found its way onto his lips. "Perhaps a . . . small amount of discretion may be advised."

Yui's lips quirked up into an impish smile. "At the same time, something _does _need to be done. Perhaps a short leave of absence while we determine what should be done . . . say, to Juuban?"

Gendo stared at his wife for a moment, one of his eyebrows quirking in amusement. "Have I told you lately how much I love you?"

The lovely researcher leaned forward once more, playfully curling his tie around her graceful fingers. "This is the first time today. I think I might need to punish you for _that _too."

Leaning forward further, his wife began to pull him inexorably forward by his tie-

"Yo, Ikari! How long are you – oh! . . . _Ohhhhh_!"

In a burst of speed that would have undoubtedly left Dr. Saotome green with envy, Gendo and Yui flew apart. With as much haste and what little dignity he hoped to retain, the former quickly straightened his tie again while the later bounced to her feet and began hurriedly smoothing out her skirt. Primping completed, the pair then turned to the door.

Ryoko's disembodied head hung before the heavy door, the amber eyed deputy's neck and long, cyan locks disappearing into the carved wood. The smile that hung from the ex space pirate's lips was positively delighted.

Yui quickly cleared her throat, perhaps just a touch loudly.

"So, it turns out that Dr. Brain's experiment had come into contact with one of the numerous, yet small, outcroppings of crystal when Sheriff Hibiki ejected it from the clearing when he rescued Sheriff Hercule. Dr. Brain determined that it must have slammed into the crystal with enough force to shatter it, introducing a number of shards into its bloodstream, where they were then integrated into its physical makeup – hence its unusual energy absorbing abilities." Amazingly, Dr. Ikari delivered the entire (haphazard) explanation in a single breath.

Perfectly stone-faced, Agent Ikari nodded curtly. "Excellent work, Dr. Ikari. That will be all."

Nodding quickly in response, she then made her way to the side door (not _quite _rushing, and not _quite _blushing all the way.) As soon as the door clicked from her exit, Gendo turned his attention back to Ryoko, who had decided to use the time to fully enter the room. The government liaison took a moment to calmly fold his hands before his mouth again, and tilted his glasses to glint in the light.

"Deputy Ryoko."

All of his efforts to put forward a detached exterior were for naught, though, as the giddily smiling Ryoko floated forward and plopped herself down onto the exact spot on his desk that his wife had just vacated.

"Ikari, you sly dog! Why didn't you say you were having a _meeting_? I could have waited a good twenty minutes or so."

He leveled his best glare in her direction, but regretfully it had about the same effect that it did on the deputy's mother. He soldiered on regardless, though. "I would thank you _not _to discuss my personal life, as it is just that."

The cyan haired engine of destruction pouted sadly. "Aw, but if you don't want to dish about your love life, then why am I here?"

He redoubled his glare, but still to no effect. Finally, resigning himself to the fact that he would never be able to intimidate this woman outside of any purely professional scenario, he released a defeated sigh. "Ryoko, I have a serious question for you, so I would appreciate a serious answer."

She obviously noticed the shift in his tone and posture, as a look of interest descended over her normally playful features.

"Tell me . . ."he inquired in a low tone, "What is your opinion of Ryouga Hibiki?"

OOOoooOOO

It had taken him several long minutes to finally come to his decision, but in the end the lonesome wanderer felt certain that he was making the right choice. Taking a deep breath, Ryouga finally placed the small black tile on the Go board, before shooting his rival a triumphant sneer.

On the far side of the board, Ranma studied the numerous white and black pieces with intense scrutiny . . . at least until he leaned back and released a frustrated groan. "Man, I can't believe they threw us _both _in jail."

Ryouga, sitting comfortably on the edge of his cot, looked up to the familiar sight of prison bars surrounding them. Even the 'Ryouga' shaped indent in the wall was still waiting to repaired. The pigtailed researcher was sitting on the far side of their purloined shogi board, using the large stack of papers that composed the Lost Boy's contract as a makeshift stool.

"Hey, what do _you _have to whine about? _I'm _supposed to be the Sheriff and they _still _threw me in here."

Ranma chuckled in amusement. "That'll teach ya to try to kill me while everyone is celebratin' the fact that we're not gonna die; man, there's gotta be some kinda irony there."

Shaking his head helplessly, Ryouga could hardly argue the point. "I guess I didn't _need _to body slam you through Washu's holographic display when I finally woke up. I mean, how was I supposed to know you actually _weren't _laughing at _me_ for a change?"

"Well, I guess I didn't need to drop kick you into Ryoko, either. Sure was funny, though," conceded the pigtailed researcher.

Ryouga rubbed his jaw gingerly. "Maybe, but she broke that fight up damn fast after that. You know, now that I think about it, this might be the longest that the two of us have actually gone without getting into a real fight."

His rival considered his words for a long moment. "Yer right . . . I hate it too."

And again, silence descended over them as Ranma returned his attention to the board.

As the wanderer impatiently awaited his rival's futile attempt to counter his strategy, Ryouga couldn't help but muse out loud. "I still can not _believe _how anticlimactically things ended. I mean, the world was saved by a _phone call_? Something just seems so wrong about that."

Ranma nodded in a sagely manner. "I know. I mean, solving a problem without a climatic martial arts duel? Just, what's the point? But what _I _can't believe is how Dr. Mizuno _forgot _about that for, like, three hours? Where the heck was her head at?"

"You know, I can appreciate the fact that neither of you may want to talk to me, what with my near destruction of Japan, but why do you _insist _on speaking as if I'm not even here?"

Both Ryouga and his rival turned to regard the blue haired scientist. The lovely young female was currently lying on the far cot of the prison cell, a small ice pack pressed against her forehead (apparently Agent Ikari's chewing out's were migraine inducing).

Ranma waved his hands frantically in the air. "How could you _possibly _forget something like 'Oh, right, my _best friend _can turn this thing off and save us all instantly'? I mean, I've seen some boneheaded things in my time, but that's gotta rank right up there."

Despite her naturally sweet demeanor, Dr. Mizuno scowled darkly in the martial artist's direction. "Well, I _had _been trapped in a giant crystal for two weeks, perhaps that _might _have contributed. Not to mention the fact that you and the deputy went out of your _way _to shock me as much as possible with your 'By the way, meet the new Sheriff' routine. Honestly, how can you blame me for being so unsettled after that?"

Feeling the familiar need to side _against _his rival, no matter what the situation was, Ryouga shot the blue haired scientist a sympathetic look. "Hey, don't worry about it, Dr. Mizuno. It could have happened to anyone. Besides, it's not like Ranma's the sharpest knife in the drawer, so he's the last one that should be criticizing you."

"Hey! Genius over here, remember?"

"_Genius_? You're the only person I know that thinks Hoboken is a martial arts technique!"

Ranma's face turned an amusing shade of red. "Damnit! If that cop hadn't arrested me for soliciting, I would have had enough to fill the pit! Then I would have proved _everyone _wrong! And who are _you _to talk, at least _I _can find my own _ass _with both hands and a _map_!"

"Hey!" Ryouga snapped, "That doesn't count! I'd had a lot to drink that night!"

The pigtailed warrior leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest, looking very much like Ryouga had just proved his point for him.

For her part, Ami looked back and forth between the pair, very evidently questioning their sanity. "Ahhh . . . be that as it may," she began tentatively, "And despite the fact that neither of you could possibly think very highly of me at the moment . . ."

The blue haired woman gingerly removed the icepack from her head and rose to her feet. She then moved over to stand beside their board before dipping into a low, respectful bow. "I would still like to offer you both my sincerest thanks. The two of you risked your lives to rescue me . . . I owe my life to the both of you."

Ryouga shifted uncomfortably, even as Ranma let out a put upon sigh as they both stared at the deeply bowing woman. As the seconds ticked by, it became readily apparent that she wasn't getting back up, either; at least, not without their say so. Even though he wasn't even sure why, the Lost Boy was getting a distinctly 'guilty' feeling crawling up spine, so he did the first thing he could think of-

"Y-you don't need to bow, it was nothing, really – well, not _nothing, _I mean, rescuing you was really important to save Japan – _not _that that was the only reason we saved you . . . but it wasn't any trouble for us to do it, um, not that we wouldn't have done it if it _had _been troublesome, because we definitely would have –"

Babble incoherently.

Luckily, his rival was considerate enough to smack him upside the head and snap him out of his downward spiral into humiliation. Ranma then shot him a pointed look, prompting the Lost Boy to chuckle in embarrassment as he regained his bearings.

"I think what Bacon Bits meant to say, was that we were just doing our jobs . . . well, _his _job for the most part, but rescuing damsels kind of old hat to us."

Ryouga scowled at the pigtailed warrior. "That's not _exactly _what I was trying to say. Just, you don't need to thank us for doing something we would have done _regardless _of the situation. The fact that you're alright is all the thanks we need." He shot a pointed look at his rival. "_Right, _Ranma?"

Ranma waved off his ire with a casual wave of his hand. "Yeah, yeah, whatever; we're big damn heroes and all that junk."

Slowly, Ami rose from her bow, a mixture of confusion and gratitude struggling for dominance on her lovely face. "That's very kind of you to say . . . I think. Still, I have to admit to being surprised. I doubt most people would be as considerate as you, considering the situation."

The fact that her last statement was not-so-subtly directed at Ryouga was not lost on the pair of martial artists. As such, the fanged warrior shot his rival a quick, superior sneer, before returning his attention to the lovely soldier of love and justice. "I don't think it should be that surprising. From the sounds of it, accidents happen all the time when it comes to finding ways to help people . . ." He paused for a moment. "Um . . . you _were _trying to help people, right? You aren't one of those section Five people, are you?"

Ami quickly shook her head. "No-no-no, I'm purely a medical researcher."

Instantly, a broad smile plastered itself across Ryouga's face. "_See_, you don't get any more noble than that!"

"A medical researcher?" The skeptical tone in the Saotome Heir's voice instantly drew Ryouga's and Ami's attention. "Well wait a second there. If yer strictly a med-nin, then what were ya doin' working on that space age crystal stuff?"

Ryouga was about to harshly shush his impolite rival - but the seemingly simple question brought him up short. Slowly, he turned to regard Ami. Even as he did, she in turn looked down to avoid his gaze. Though it annoyed him to no end that Ranma was actually making good sense, even he couldn't ignore it. "H-he does raise a valid question, Dr. Mizuno. Crystalline city planning seems pretty far removed from most conventional medical areas of expertise that I know of. What exactly _were _you doing?"

The shame-faced doctor shuffled her feet uncomfortably for several long seconds before finally letting out a resigned sigh.

"Cheating . . ."

"Huh?" Ryouga and Ranma sounded in stereo.

"What do ya mean by that?" asked the latter.

Ami tentatively lifted her chin to meet the pigtailed researcher's inquiring gaze, only to sigh a second time. "My progress review was set for the end of the month . . ."

Immediately, Ranma 'Ahhh'd', as if what the young woman had said had actually made even a lick of sense.

"Progress review? What the heck does that have to do with anything?" asked the suitably confused Hibiki.

Ranma groaned loudly. "It's when the bigwigs get together and go over all of your work with a fine tooth comb. Then, usin' whatever alien logic they use, they decide if your research has actually been comin' along at an acceptable level or not. I mean, I passed _my _review without much trouble, on account of how great I am, but still, goin' through it was about as fun as those IRS tax audits those Americans are always goin' on about."

Dr. Mizuno nodded sharply in agreement. "Exactly. Don't get me wrong, I _love _being here, I love being on the cutting edge of scientific discovery . . . However, my first priority will always be to my friends, to my team . . . and, unfortunately, that has been becoming increasingly evident in my work lately."

It took Ryouga a moment to clue in. "_Oh_, your vigilante work."

Another nod, this one far less sharp. "Indeed, my _vigilante _work." A forlorn expression settled on the blue haired female's face and she slowly sat down to Ryouga's side on his cot, completely missing the tinge of red blooming on his cheeks. "I don't want to sound conceited, but I am a very smart woman, Sheriff Hibiki, _very _smart. However, compared to some of the minds that occupy this town, sometimes I feel like a chimp trying to rub two sticks together to produce fire."

She gestured to Ranma with a wave of her hand. "Even you, Dr. Saotome, in your own unique way, are truly _brilliant. _And you possess the drive and boundless energy to focus completely on your work. I'm not surprised that someone like you would have no trouble with your review. However, for me it's different: I'm . . . I'm _not _brilliant, not _driven_ like so many people here. I have to work _so _hard to further my research, to pioneer into the unknown reaches of scientific discovery."

The young woman's hands curled up into tight fists, twisting the fabric of her skirt mercilessly in their grip. "And on top of that, so many emergencies seemed to be coming up back home; always dragging me away from my work. I can scarcely even count the number of times that I've been just teetering on the edge of epiphany, only to have the incessant beep of my communicator irrevocably destroy my concentration . . ."

Finally, Dr. Mizuno lifted her gaze once more to meet theirs. "So, when I discovered that I had a review coming up in such a short time . . . I panicked. I knew that with things the way they were, I would never be allowed to stay . . . so – so I decided to cheat. With Mi – ahem – Sailor Venus' help, I teleported to the moon and gathered as much of the surviving Silver Millennium technology that I could locate."

Ryouga nodded sagely, despite not having a single clue what she was talking about. Then again, it hardly seemed like his understanding was important, it looked like the simple act of confessing her misdeeds was more what the doctor ordered than any kind of sympathy on his part.

Barely even acknowledging his nod, the blue haired scientist continued. "I had hoped to find some form of data storage device, something, _anything _that might hold a key to any of the medical technologies used back in the Moon Kingdom. Unfortunately, I found such a random assortment of devices and crystals that I didn't even know _what _I had, let alone where to start my analysis."

This time, it was Ranma that nodded in understanding. "So you found yourself getting sidetracked pretty fast with all the weird stuff ya found, right?"

A weak sigh. "Correct. Unfortunately, one of the crystals that fascinated me the most was the crystal which nearly destroyed Japan. I noticed its unusual reaction to energy, most notably magical and other esoteric forms of energy, very early on in my research."

Ryouga whistled. "I bet. Man, they must have had some crazy technology back in the Millennium Falcon; I mean, making entire cities like that . . ." A short pause. "Wait a second, you make it sound like this civilization was lost long ago, so why the heck would they make a crystal that would make a crystal Tokyo?"

Red tinged Ami's cheeks as her embarrassment increased by an order of magnitude. ". . . Actually, the crystal was a blank slate when I found it . . . which was why it hadn't started growing immediately after we teleported it back. . . . I-it was actually _me _that inputted the design for Crystal Tokyo into the crystal matrix during my experimentation."

An incredulous look spread across Ranma's face. "What? You designed an _entire city _in your spare time?"

A quick shake of her head indicated the negative. "Actually, I cheated there, again. I had managed to obtain a schematic for Crystal Tokyo during . . . a – a most unorthodox journey that my friends and I had some years ago. All I really needed to do was download the file directly from my Mercury computer."

Ryouga scratched his chin in thought. "I guess that begs the question then; it sounds like you had everything pretty well in hand, so what went wrong?"

Again, the blue haired woman's gaze dropped to her knees. "I – I got sloppy. I had _thought_ I had everything perfectly under control. I had shielded my lab from all external energy sources, set up sensors and dampeners and all manner of failsafes; all designed specifically to negate the possibility of any form of magical energy from interacting with the crystal after I had programmed it."

A sad nod of understanding came from Ranma's direction. "I thought the same thing when I designed that experiment to attempt to cure myself of the Neko Ken . . . So what happened then?"

Ami graced them with a sardonic grin. "In all of my haste to develop something that could save my career, I forgot the most important source of magical energy in all of the GeoFront . . . myself. I had fallen so completely into the routine of doing research, being interrupted by my team mates, battling some nameless foe, then returning to begin the entire cycle anew, that the very first time that Sailor Moon contacted me about another threat, without even thinking about it . . . I transformed right in front of the crystal . . ."

Ryouga winced, letting out a pained sound. "Well, that certainly explains a lot, then."

His rival nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I guess as far as reasons for screwing up go, that's a pretty good one."

"_Ranma!_" Ryouga spun on his rival. "We're supposed to be _cheering her up_, not making her feel worse!"

Ranma shrugged. "_What_? That's what I'm doin'. I totally understand not wanting to get booted outta here. I mean, sure, Agent Ikari isn't gonna give a crap about _why _she did it, but _I _understand."

The mere mention of Agent Ikari was enough to cause all of the blood to drain from Dr. Mizuno's face, which would have made for a good porcelain doll metaphor, except that Ryouga was fairly sure he'd never seen a doll made with such a look of utter despair on her face before. Instantly, the fanged warrior leapt to his feet and dragged his rival up by his collar.

"Damnit, Ranma! Don't you have even an _ounce _of sensitivity in your body? Why would you remind Dr. Mizuno that she'll likely be facing severe criminal charges for what she did, and that just getting fired will probably be the _least _of her worries?"

Ami fainted dead away . . .

Ranma shot a flat glance in Lost Boy's direction. "Man . . . you really _are _a moron, aren't you?"

"Damnit! That was all _your _fault!"

"What? _I'm _not the one that dropped you on your head as a baby, how is this _my _fault?"

"If _you _hadn't brought it up, this never would have happened!"

"That is the _stupidest _thing I've ever heard, and I've known _you _for years, so that's saying something!"

With a deep growl, Ryouga shoved his rival back roughly and dropped into a fighting stance. "That's it, Ranma! _Prepare to di_-"

The small bell that hung above the sheriff office's door tinkled loudly as the door swung open. A moment later, a widely smiling Ryoko floated into the room and began to make her way to her desk. The ex-Space Pirate only made it three feet before she noticed the pair of martial artist's preparing to inflict massive bodily harm on each other inside the confines of her holding cell.

Ryoko's eyes narrowed . . .

In a blur of motion rarely observed outside of life and death battles, Ryouga and Ranma nearly teleported back to their seats and began placing black and white tiles on their purloined board at breakneck speeds.

Ryoko smirked at the display. "Damn right."

Dominance firmly reinforced, the cyan haired demoness then floated the rest of the way to her desk and lazily pressed one of the buttons on its surface. In response, the holding cell door swung open.

"Alright, Lady Fingers, you can get outta here now."

Ryouga grumbled darkly as his pigtailed rival smugly rose from his seat and dusted off his pants far more than was actually necessary before swaggering out of the cell. About half way to the door, though, the Saotome Heir stopped and turned back. "Hey, what about Bacon Bits, there?"

Ryoko's smirk (which was merely malevolent at the best of times) descended once again into the depths of pure evil. "Oh, don't worry about him. We have a few things to _discuss_. Now get out of here, Saotome, ya bother me."

Ranma turned back to Ryouga one last time before leaving, shooting him a sly wink. "Heh, good luck, Buddy."

And then he was gone.

Ryouga spared a glance to the unconscious form of the young woman sharing his cell (not to mention his cot; man, was Ryoko gonna go to town when she noticed _that_). The lack of consciousness thing seemed like a pretty good idea at the moment, he was just jealous that Ami had thought of it first. More than a little forlorn himself, Ryouga let out a defeated sigh.

"Why do I have a feeling that my luck will be anything but?"

OOOoooOOO

One Week Later

OOOoooOOO

Ryouga tugged at his collar, unsuccessfully trying to stretch out the over-starched throat hugger, before finally smiling and smoothing out the rest of his new, tightly fitted shirt. The newly bedecked Hibiki turned to face his companion, sitting comfortably behind her desk.

"You know, this isn't all that bad. Still, I can't believe it took them a _week _to get me a uniform."

Ryoko smirked. "Hey, bullet proof, acid proof, energy resistant material that weighs as much as cloth takes time to replicate. I must admit to being surprised, though; it actually looks good on you . . . Sheriff."

The not-so newly anointed sheriff smiled proudly. "Thanks, Ryoko, that means a lot to me." He shifted around a bit, still trying to get used to the feel of his new, beige uniform. "Still, it feels a little on the tight side."

His erstwhile partner smiled broadly. "That's what I'm talking about! I mean, what's the point of having a hot piece of law enforcement running around if you can't get a good look?"

Ryouga felt his face heat up to fusion reaction inducing levels. "_Ryoko!_ We're going to be partners until Hercule gets back, so can we at least _pretend _to have a professional relationship?"

She replied with an amused shrug. "Hey, I never said I was interested. I just happen to appreciate the finer things in life." She followed up her declaration with a rather lewd look in his direction.

Though it hardly felt possibly, the sheriff's face reddened even further. Moving quickly, he slipped behind his own desk and dropped into his nicely cushioned chair. His move towards modesty prompted a teasingly artificial pout from his shameless partner.

"_Ahem_, when _is _Hercule getting back, anyway?" he asked, deftly shifting the topic. "I mean, if they'd just brought him to me, I would have had him out of there in under a minute. After all, I have a lot of experience with restoring people from statues."

One of Ryoko's eyebrows rose skeptically. "Really? And who would _that _have been?"

"T-" Ryouga almost responded, but suddenly realized his error. ". . . Um, _Dr. Mizuno_! Yeah, that counts, right?"

Ryoko rolled her eyes with great aplomb. "Hardly. Besides, do you know how mad the higher ups were when they found out how reckless you were when you saved her? Don't worry about Hercule, though, Gendo assured me that he was in good hands."

OOOoooOOO

In the dim light provided by the ancient hanging bulbs it was impossible to make out the contents of the wooden crate. This fact was made doubly so when a wooden lid dropped down on top of it, hiding the interior from view completely. Then, with the liberal application of a trusty claw hammer, said lid was solidly nailed to the crate. The only markings on the entire wooden box was the stenciled message on top, which read -

**TOP SECRET**

**ARMY INTEL. 9906753**

**DO NOT OPEN!**

The hammering was soon completed, only for a pair of hands to shift the heavy crate onto a dolly. With a grunt of effort, the Little Old Government Warehouseman began to push his heavy burden down an aisle; an aisle that was formed by huge stacks or crates. The crates came in many shapes and sizes, but when it came right down to it, they all looked eerily like the crate which he was currently pushing, even down to the stenciled warnings on top, give or take a few numbers.

Already beginning to sweat at the effort of pushing this especially large crate, the Little Old Government Warehouseman felt certain that he had to be in one of the biggest rooms in the world.

And it was full.

Crates and crates.

All looking alike.

All gathering dust.

And then, just as countless times before, the Little Old Government Warehouseman, pushing his new crate ahead of him, found his destination and turned into another aisle, disappearing from view.

OOOoooOOO

For some unknown reason, a shudder ran down Ryouga's spine, but he quickly shrugged off the errant disturbance.

"So, anything on the docket for today, Deputy?"

Sticking out her tongue in a display of just what she thought of his meager attempt at professionalism, his trusty sidekick lazily picked up a short stack of papers from her desk. Taking a brief moment to read the first document, she held it up for his perusal.

"Washu wants you to go in for a physical."

The page burst into flames.

"Like _that's _gonna happen. Damn woman is a sexual predator in that lab of hers."

Ryouga was sure, had he been drinking coffee, he would have spit it out all over his desk. The fact that Washu was a twelve year old girl, at least in appearance, was just all _kinds _of wrong.

"_Next_!" he squeaked loudly.

Ryoko glanced over the next one.

"Let's see. Apparently Professor Membrane wants to run a test on his Quantum Field Generator this afternoon."

"What the heck does that do?" he felt compelled to ask.

His sidekick shrugged. "Hell if I know. Gendo just wants one of us to be there in case anything goes wrong."

Ryouga stared pointedly at the cyan haired deputy long and hard . . . before finally sighing in defeat. "Fine, _I'll _go."

Ryoko smiled at her effortless victory. "Damn right. Oh, Gendo also wants us to keep an eye on Professor Tomoe. Apparently he's been acting a little odd lately, could be some kind of take over the world thing."

The fanged sheriff stared at her in mild disbelief. "You're really that desensitized to it, eh?"

She offered him a teasing smile and a nod of her head in return. "Don't worry. I'll check it out, since you're gonna be busy."

Well, that was something at least. "Thanks, Ryoko. So, is that it then?"

Apparently not, as she shuffled yet another piece of paper to the top of the stack.

"Meh, Lady Fingers wants you to head over to his place; says he's got a new technique he wants you to try."

He actually considered that for a moment. "Hmm, well, that could either be very cool, or horribly humiliating . . . still, it will give us the chance to discuss who we should invite as the fourth for that poker night thing he wants to start up."

"Heh, as long as it ain't Kagato, I'll be happy to clean out your wallets on a weekly basis."

He rolled his eyes at his deputy's (very likely valid) bravado for gambling. Ryoko, for her part, prepared to dump the thin sheaf of papers into the recycling bin . . . when a small envelope dropped out, quickly catching her attention.

"Hmph, lookie here, nearly missed one." The cyan haired demoness picked up the envelope, flipping it over to read who it was addressed to and from. "_Oooooh_, this one is from _Dr. Mizuno_!"

The mere mention of the blue haired researcher's name was enough to perk Ryouga right up out of his minor funk. "Really? She's back from her suspension already? That's good to hear."

Ryoko shook her head in disbelief. "I still can't believe _that_ was all she got. Hell, I was half expecting an execution for all the crap she nearly flung straight through the fan."

It was Ryouga's turn to smirk. "I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about. Unfortunately, the person in charge of writing up the report on the entire incident was extremely new to his job and _terribly _incompetent; missed all _kinds _of details." He shook his head sadly. "Gendo sure was upset with me."

His partner could only stare at him in wide eyed wonder, until finally a sly smile formed on her lips. "There's hope for you yet, Hibiki. This might just work out after all."

With that, Ryoko tore open the envelope with nary a second thought.

"Hey, that's mine!"

Quickly pulling out the letter within, she shrugged her shoulders impishly. "_Oops_, too late."

He glared for all he was worth as the nosy female indulgently began reading through the contents of the communiqué. "You are aware that opening other people's mail is a crime, right?"

Only for Ryoko to scoff loudly. "What are you gonna do, arrest me? Oooh, this is _good_!"

Unable to contain his curiosity, or cow his partner, Ryouga opted for the third option of leaning forward eagerly. "Well, what does it say?"

For just a moment, Ryoko looked ready to tease him mercilessly, when an unexpectedly genuine smile appeared on her face.

"Looks like our little lab mouse wants to invite you to dinner; thanks for you saving her narrow butt." Ryoko looked over the letter again, chuckling in amusement. "Who woulda figured Nerdmeister would have the guts to be this forward."

Ryouga rolled his eyes. "Oh, quit it, Ryoko. There's no way anyone as good looking as her could be that shy. Heck, she's probably already got a boyfriend and this is just a thank you, like she wrote."

Ryoko stared at him through lidded eyes. "_Riiight_. Trust me, if she already had a boyfriend, you wouldn't be getting an invitation like this. She is _totally _into you."

He couldn't help but shake his head in disbelief. "Stop teasing, Ryoko. What could she possibly see in me? I mean, she's smart, beautiful, sweet . . . not to mention strangely familiar, and I . . . well, I'm just a dusty vagabond turned sheriff."

Ryoko continued to stare at him through her lidded eyes (man, he really wished he knew what that expression meant). "Hibiki, you _punched _your way through a wall of _glass _to rescue her. Trust me, that kinda thing makes a pretty big impression. Besides, knowing Miz-Nerdo, this is probably the first time she's had a big, muscly alpha male type showing any interest in her."

The fanged sheriff chuckled in amusement. "Big muscly Alpha male? Heh, I don't know if that's an insult or a compliment."

The cyan haired demoness rolled her eyes in exasperation. "Oh, get over yourself. You're a stud and you know it. Of course, I personally am more into the quiet carrot farming type, but for someone like her, you're probably we – _ahem_ – a wild dream come true."

Not exactly sure how to deal with the slightly disturbing compliments his deputy was lavishing him with, Ryouga began to run his hand through his hair, chuckling nervously.

"Now you're just being ridiculous. Beautiful women just aren't attracted to me. They're all too busy being infatuated with Ranma."

Again, Ryoko rolled her eyes. "Sheesh, talk about self esteem problems," she muttered darkly. A moment later, she leaned back into her chair, a sly smirk appearing on her lips. "Okay, listen here, partner. If it weren't for you, my apartment would probably be buried under a mountain of rubble right now, so I owe you one."

Suddenly, the lovely female leaned forward, her smile growing disturbingly devious. "You let me give you a few pointers, and I bet I can get your dinner invitation changed to a _breakfast _invitation."

Ryouga looked at the demoness like she had just lost her mind. "What? Why would I want to do _that_? You get a lot more food at dinner!"

For some reason, Ryoko's jaw dropped open as she stared at him in a look that screamed 'utter, complete and total disbelief'. He was so startled by her reaction that he was about to ask her what the problem was . . .

He _was_, before the entire office suddenly chose that moment to rattle violently in tune with the discordant sound of a distant explosion

Several seconds later, the phone rang.

The pair of law enforcement officers stared at the piece of black plastic for two long rings . . . until Ryoko realized that it was the phone on _her _desk that was ringing. Sighing weakly, she answered the accursed thing.

"Yep . . . yep . . . un huh . . . Okay, the Sheriff will be there immediately."

Ryouga groaned loudly. "Oh, Lord, what now?"

His lovely assistant smirked wickedly. "Looks like Dr. Gero and Biko are having another . . . disagreement over whose robots are more powerful."

The already beleaguered sheriff sighed. "I guess I better go break it up then, right?"

A teasing smile and nod. "You might want to take the HAZSIT suit, though."

Nodding wearily, Ryouga tapped the button on his desk which opened the hidden closet with all of the funky safety gear in it. Pushing himself up from his seat, he moved to grab one of the gaudy looking yellow suits which slid out from the closet, when his partner chuckled in amusement.

"Hold on, Hibiki. Those are the Hazardous _Materials _suits. You're gonna want the Hazardous _Situations _suit."

He offered her a queer look. "What's the difference?"

Standing up (and incidentally phasing through her desk), Ryoko donned a smile of pure delight.

"Oh, you are gonna _love _this."

OOOoooOOO

Dr. Gero scowled across the verdant subterranean plain at the maniacally laughing, if somewhat scantily clad, figure of the infuriating Dr. Daitokuji. Between them, the once pristine meadow had been torn asunder by the battle being waged betwixt their respective creations.

His precious Number Eleven, looking very much like a rather handsome young man wearing a black body suit, dodged nimbly to the side as the ground where he had been standing erupted into a fountain of radioactive glass. The good doctor marveled at the perfect balance between form and function he had created in Number Eleven as his android fluidly spun to the side, unleashing a powerful blast of raw, crimson energy from the emitter imbedded in its palm.

Unfortunately, the potent blast did little more than scorch the six-inch, duranium plated armor of the lumbering sixteen foot monstrosity that the tedious young woman standing across from him had cobbled together.

"Absolutely no sense of style," he groused to himself.

The blasted thing looked like a cheap attempt at building a Transformer, and not the classic ones, either, one of the _Micheal Bay _Transformers.

Dr. Gero shuddered.

_Bah_. He'd be damned if he let an upright walking artillery piece, built by some spoiled lack wit, destroy _his_ creation. He reached for his trusty remote. Maybe it was time to move up to _sixty _percent of its maximum power-

"**Dr. Gero, Dr. Daitokuji . . .**" The booming voice nearly deafened the good doctor, even drowning out the annoying laugh of that lavender haired witch.

It was followed a moment later by a massive tremor which nearly toppled him from his feet. His android faired better, though Biko's cumbersome beast collapsed completely, to his amusement.

The source of the voice, and the seismic shockwave, was impossible to miss. Standing over five stories tall, towering over even his rival's overly large comptraption, polished gold and ebony armor gleaming in the sun was . . .

_Sheriff Gundam._

"Oh, hell . . ." the genius muttered.

He could almost see the fanged smile plastered across the face of their newly appointed sheriff through the two feet of solid Gundanium armor.

"**I'm going to have to ask you both to come with me.**"

_Fin._

**Chapter 1 **

Ranma 1/2

Eureka

The Road To Cydonia

Dragon Ball Z

Chobits

Project A-ko

Tenchi

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Cooking Master Boy

Yu Yu Hakusho

Bleach

**Chapter 2**

Kim Possible

Venture Brothers

Knight Sabers

Robotech

Naruto

**Chapter 3**

All Purpose Cultural Catgirl Nuku Nuku

Pokemon

Dexter's Lab

Jimmy Newtron

Invader Zim

X-Com

Men in Black

Pinky and the Brain

Full Metal Panic

**Chapter 4**

Power Puff Girls

My Life As A Teenage Robot

Marvel Comics

Stargate SG-1

Power Rangers

Sailor Moon (Come on, you really didn't see this coming? It's practically obligatory)

**Chapter 5**

Back to the Future

Dr. Who

**Epilogue**

Dark Titans

Raiders of the Lost Ark

Gundam (Any of the dozens of variations)


End file.
